The "What's on your mind?" Thread -2017

[segelkatt]

No matter what opinion people may have about Al Gore his book and DVD called "An Inconvenient Truth" show the result of global warming in many instances.

 

[arouetta]

I'm on a short budget too but will not go "cheap" for my cats' food, they are my furry children and I would not shortchange my human children because one of them needed a special diet.

If I were to spend $50 or more a week on the cats, I would have to shortchange my human child. It would be a choice between feeding the cats or feeding the kid. I do what I can for both, which means no organic and frozen veggies over fresh and ground beef instead of nice cuts of steak. Everything in life is a trade-off. I don't think I've done too bad, considering the age and general health of both my kid and my cats.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

No matter what opinion people may have about Al Gore his book and DVD called "An Inconvenient Truth" show the result of global warming in many instances.

I posted an article from Mother Nature News on FB the other day showing green things growing on Antartica. Beautiful, yet horrible to those who understand the implications.

arouetta so long as one is doing the best one can with what one has, no one should pass judgment. I really don't think the comment was meant as such, though, because I know how caring segelkatt is.

Rainy and quiet here today. I put out a water bowl for the wanderers, and it is being used. I worry about them having clean water in this heat.

 

[arouetta]

Yeah, I probably took it the wrong way. I guess it's a knee-jerk reaction left over from the Mommy wars, where no matter what you do a good chunk of people feel that your damaging your child by (working, staying home and not working, using daycare, not using daycare and depriving social contact, etc. etc.).

I'm sorry segelkatt.

 

[foxxycat]

Just popping in quick. I'm sure you a have seen the news. My employer has locked us out of our job. I'm picketing 8-9 hours a day. It's been scary because we can't do anything. The salary people still talk to us. This is coming from the investment company that loaned the bankruptcy money. They are known union busters. They must be so upset because thet couldn't bust this union.

I may not agree with the vote but I remain solid in supporting whatever decision the majority makes.

We had one guy drive by yesterday calling us "have a nice life You a $$ holes"

Friggin bonehead. Luckily no one has thrown anything at us. Many people don't know that we are a custom welding and machine shop. They think we make washing machines and computers!

 

[arouetta]

Just popping in quick. I'm sure you a have seen the news. My employer has locked us out of our job. I'm picketing 8-9 hours a day. It's been scary because we can't do anything. The salary people still talk to us. This is coming from the investment company that loaned the bankruptcy money. They are known union busters. They must be so upset because thet couldn't bust this union.

I may not agree with the vote but I remain solid in supporting whatever decision the majority makes.

We had one guy drive by yesterday calling us "have a nice life You a $$ holes"

Friggin bonehead. Luckily no one has thrown anything at us. Many people don't know that we are a custom welding and machine shop. They think we make washing machines and computers!

Oh dear.

Are you getting paid for picketing, like unions often do? I hope so.

 

[segelkatt]

I sent a note to foxxycat on another thread about that, a lot depends on what the union did before the lockout.

arouetta - no offense taken. Of course I would never feed my cats before feeding my children and I would not expect anyone else either. I do find it peculiar that you would spend $50.00 or more a week for your cats' food or did I understand that wrong? I have 5 cats including the foster, one weighs 19 lbs and another weighs 13, so those boys eat a lot, and I spend approximately $150.00 per MONTH for their food and a $45.00 more for litter.

 

[arouetta]

arouetta - no offense taken. Of course I would never feed my cats before feeding my children and I would not expect anyone else either. I do find it peculiar that you would spend $50.00 or more a week for your cats' food or did I understand that wrong? I have 5 cats including the foster, one weighs 19 lbs and another weighs 13, so those boys eat a lot, and I spend approximately $150.00 per MONTH for their food and a $45.00 more for litter.

Back when I was getting Blue Buffalo, the bags were $20 at the local PetSmart and I needed between a bag and a half to two bags a week, and Blue Buffalo was the cheapest of the quality foods there. Sometimes I think about switching to wet food, but based on previous experiments it would come to 2 of the 5.5-6 ounce cans per cat each day (or 4 of the 3 ounce cans per cat per day). Anything less leaves them so hungry they will steal meat off of plates. That comes to 42 larger cans or 84 smaller cans a week. Either way, ouch.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Oh dear.

Are you getting paid for picketing, like unions often do? I hope so.

She sent me a quick message via FB today. Spending most of her time on the picket lines. The big advantage of the lock-out rather than striking is that the employees can file for unemployment if they are locked out, but NOT if they strike. That makes a huge difference to them. She'll be back as soon as things get calmed down!

 

[margd]

I also heard from foxxycat who says that the unemployment benefits are being expedited which is excellent news.

It's discouraging that people yell and (might) throw things at striking employees. I don't recall that being the case years ago, when unions were more common. For all the problems associated with unions, they are supporting workers against exploitation and their demise in this country has left a lot of people hurting.

 

[segelkatt]

I have not heard back from her but I had looked up the info on NH Unemployment Insurance regarding Labor Disputes and sent it to her. Most people do not know how to look up this info and even if they did would not know how how to interpret it. The laws are pretty much the same in every state because the program is mostly funded by the Feds and does not change much over the years. That is why my advice to her was valid although I have not worked for UI in Calif for 8 years. I was quite sure that she was not "on strike" but had been locked out with no way to go to work. When there is a strike one can cross the picket line and thus become what is known as a "scab" and go to work. The people who are on that kind of picket line will not be eligible for UI. But people who are locked out for no cause of their own are eligible. The line is not the same kind of picket, those people have no way to go to work, the doors are locked.

 

[segelkatt]

Anyone can FILE for Unemployment Benefits, if the person is eligible is another matter. Never ASSUME you are not eligible because you are usually wrong. Even somebody who has quit a job may be eligible, it depends on why the person quit and that possibly varies among states. Also, somebody who has only a part time job but is available for full time work can file and possibly get part benefits. Spread the word, that law is nationwide. Yes, I'm an expert on this after 20 years of determining eligibility.

 

[mani]

I'm wondering if there is a thread to vote on the photo contest? The entry thread was closed (not just closed to entries but also to posts) so can't ask there. Normally one is created right afterwards but notifications have been wonky for me ever since the new site went up. SO hoping someone "in the know" sees this! AND hoping I get the notification if someone replies to me, ha!

Hi @donutte
It's up now.. just in case you missed it.

 

[foxxycat]

Just wanted to say we are not Striking! !!!!!!!


We got locked out! For now wait for the next move. Union will file charges against the company for unfair labor practice. They walked out of mediation meeting. We are willing to forgo raises But not stripping of benefits. The salary people already lost those benefits. They should have unionized.

In this political environment-it would be in the best interests if all working class people unionized. Many companies are doing away with ot. They instead hire two crews for two different week shifts. This is bad news for workers. Pretty soon we won't have any jobs that offer more than 30 hours a week.

I picketed today for a good 9 hours. Filed for unemployment benefits. Enlisted in job search. Going to look at training for vet technology. Let the state help with costs.

 

[foxxycat]

Thank you segkat for your help. Yes I've spent all Friday when everyone left for the day using up PTO since I don't think rhey will pay it. I elected to stay the day so I could research this unemployment thing. Some salary person said that I need to research and not listen to half truths. Ok whatever.
I also hung around so I
could keep an eye on salary people. They have been breaking rules left and right.

This week we noted many people taking tons of smoke breaks. If it was us we would have been written up. They also had someone driving a fork truck who normally wears high heels and in the office. I don't know if rhey had experience.

We also heard three salary people gave their notice.

The company is forcing salary people to do our jobs which is ridiculous. The arrogance of these pinhead people amaze me.

The ones welding now used to weld but now thwy are engineers. I tell you I'd be madder than a wet hen if those people forced me to go work on the shop floor. No air conditioning. Dirty and hot. Shake my head.

I tell you what person will want to work for a company who doesn't give a rats behind about them??!!! The arrogance!!!!!

 

[segelkatt]

Start looking for another job immediately, this one is unlikely to come back and if it does you won't have the seniority or anything else you had before, it will be as if you had started at the bottom at a brand-new job with whatever benefits they want to give you. Your old job is gone, period. If there is an offer of work from them it is considered a new job, not your old job and you can refuse it if it is not anywhere near what you had before.
UI also requires you to look for a new job but you don't have to accept just any old job, it should be as close as possible to your usual occupation at approximately the same rate of pay and benefits. You also don't have to apply for work that is outside your usual travel time to get to work unless you are planning on moving. Of course you don't have to look for the same kind of work, you can look for anything for which you are qualified. Keep good records for anything you do to acquire work, which newspapers you perused, which websites, where you have applied and the results if any, this also keeps you from applying at the same place over and over.
Don't spend too much time picketing or UI will say you are too busy with that to be available for work elsewhere and will disqualify you then. You never know who sees you picketing and will turn you in, particularly employees of your former employer. Only picket outside your usual work hours and that means all shifts. They require you to be able (not sick or injured) and available during usual work hours for your kind of work.
If you go for any kind of training make sure it is outside of usual work hours or that you would be willing to give up the training for a job, so beware of paying a lot of money or your willingness to give up the training would be suspect. Thus: night school for a night watchman would disqualify the night watchman, and day school for a secretary would disqualify the secretary. Again: able and available. There are many such traps. If in doubt send me a Private message, I'll look up whatever NH UI says, we don't have to tell the whole world.

UI means Unemployment Insurance, just in case you are wondering.

 

[artiemom]

Start looking for another job immediately, this one is unlikely to come back and if it does you won't have the seniority or anything else you had before, it will be as if you had started at the bottom at a brand-new job with whatever benefits they want to give you. Your old job is gone, period. If there is an offer of work from them it is considered a new job, not your old job and you can refuse it if it is not anywhere near what you had before.
UI also requires you to look for a new job but you don't have to accept just any old job, it should be as close as possible to your usual occupation at approximately the same rate of pay and benefits. You also don't have to apply for work that is outside your usual travel time to get to work unless you are planning on moving. Of course you don't have to look for the same kind of work, you can look for anything for which you are qualified. Keep good records for anything you do to acquire work, which newspapers you perused, which websites, where you have applied and the results if any, this also keeps you from applying at the same place over and over.
Don't spend too much time picketing or UI will say you are too busy with that to be available for work elsewhere and will disqualify you then. You never know who sees you picketing and will turn you in, particularly employees of your former employer. Only picket outside your usual work hours and that means all shifts. They require you to be able (not sick or injured) and available during usual work hours for your kind of work.
If you go for any kind of training make sure it is outside of usual work hours or that you would be willing to give up the training for a job, so beware of paying a lot of money or your willingness to give up the training would be suspect. Thus: night school for a night watchman would disqualify the night watchman, and day school for a secretary would disqualify the secretary. Again: able and available. There are many such traps. If in doubt send me a Private message, I'll look up whatever NH UI says, we don't have to tell the whole world.

EXCELLENT advice!!!! thank you for offering your help..
a lot of things I found out on the web, but you have clear, concise information.. and stuff that I never knew.. although my issue is disability.. You NEVER know WHO is watching and FILMING... be careful...

 

[segelkatt]

If you had state disability (not all states have that) I could probably look it up, but I suspect you have disability through Social Security which is different, I don't know how to look it up and probably would not interpret all of it correctly. Federal law has different wrinkles.

 

[tallyollyopia]

What kind of people hold a birthday party for a one-year-old in a bar?! Good for you, Cindy. They've already ditched you; it's definitely time for you to ditch them! This "invitation" is nothing more than a request for money, and you owe them nothing.



Fun! Sounds as if, when you're done with it, you'll have some kind of cool cat playhouse. Just add some carpeting in strategic places.



I was born with no sense of smell. I remember (vividly) the time I bought a small carton of milk from a vending machine in a break room, and it turned out the milk had gone sour. I ended up with sour milk all over my clothes, and it wasn't at all funny.



This is very difficult. I think all you can do is to be there for her, let her talk about it and try to help her understand what may have driven this person to use drugs. It is possible to be non-judgemental without condoning dangerous behavior. Kids are smart enough to know the difference between "He used drugs because he was unhappy and couldn't find any better solutions" and "It's okay to use drugs to numb yourself."





Margret

It's a difficult concept for a lot of people to grasp, but a sense of smell is important. We have the sense to protect us from foods (and other things) that can hurt us.

I just ran into this story today: Student beat him, then others kicked him. Later, 8-year-old kills himself

What on earth was the school thinking, telling the mother that her son had fainted?! If he was unconscious after being beaten, he probably had a concussion and a mere trip to the nurse's office is not sufficient for that. And not telling her that he'd been kicked while lying there unconscious? This poor mother had no chance at all to take proper care of her child in the aftermath of a violent assault because no one had told her there had even been an assault. As for how much the child remembered, well, obviously enough to feel desperate, and probably not enough to ask for help.


Margret

I'll tell you what they were thinking; they were thinking they didn't want to get in trouble.

I was reaching for something above my head today and I realized it didn't hurt. Huh? So I stretched my arm where it just won't go and there wasn't much discomfort left.

For two and a half months I do the right thing and keep pushing my shoulder as much as I can so that I neither lose muscle strength nor lose mobility and it doesn't get better. Work doesn't schedule me for a week and while I have walked some at the fitness center I have completely ignored the weight set, which I know I shouldn't ignore it, and I get a lot better in just a few days???? What the heck???? How does doing the right thing not work but doing the wrong thing work?

I'm so confused.

Look on the bright side--it feels better!

The other day the store had a sale where you spend $25 and get $5 off. The cat food came to $24 so I looked at the cat treats. I had a coupon for any Fancy Feast treats and I grabbed the cheapest one (Duos).

Three days ago I opened the bag and two of my cats gobbled them up like I had been denying food for a week. Not surprised about the third, he's never accepted a treat in his time with me.

The crazy thing is that normally Shadow has a meow that just says "Service me now servant!" But the last two days she's had a meow that just says "Please, please, please, I love you, I love you lots." I didn't figure it out until this morning, she's begging for those treats. I don't know if they are putting addictive substances in them or what's going on, but those treats are a definite hit.

I usually get suspicious when something like that happens.

I'm just checking in on this thread for the first time in ages and am trying to catch up- so much has been going on with everyone! For now, just wanted to ask tallyollyopia how your grandmother is doing? Lupus is such a nasty, nasty disease. I had a mild case for decades that is now in remission but ended up learning a lot about it and my heart goes out to anyone with this terrible affliction.

Does your grandmother have any a medical power-of-attorney or end-of-life directive on file? Your mother really shouldn't be frozen out like this and it should be clear to the hospital that your grandfather isn't in a position to help. Perhaps it would help to talk with the Patient Advocate (every hospital has a program for this) and find out what needs to be done legally so your mother can get some information and have more input.

Wishing your grandma the very best.

My mother is the medical power-of-attorney--the hospital just doesn't want to deal with her.

I had a heart attack 4 years ago, due to Afib. I wasn't diagnosed with High Blood Pressure until about 2 years ago so, along with medication, I had to lower my sodium intake.

I DO have a few tips that work (IF you apply them!).

Of course, the first thing you are told is to go on a low-sodium diet and/or no added salt. Sodium intake should be approximately 1,500 to 2,300mg per day. Americans consume, on average, about 3,400mg per day -- wayyy too much!

When you think about it, 1,500mg (recommended daily intake) is equal to 0.75 teaspoons of salt - there is that much on an order of McDonald's fries! If you just HAVE to have fries, order them with no salt.

Fast foods and Processed foods are you worst enemies! Do you know that one Big Mac has 1,007mg of sodium?! That is 2/3 of your daily required intake! Lunch meats and other packaged foods are loaded with salt. Buy low-sodium deli meat. There is really no difference in the taste. Or, better yet, but fresh chicken breast, broil it and slice it yourself.
Buy lower-sodium cheeses. Do you know that 1/2 cup regular cottage cheese contains 458mg of sodium? Switch to Nonfat or Fat Free cottage cheese - it only has 9mg per 1/2 cup! If you are used to adding a slice of cheese to your ham sandwhich or burger, try Swiss at 54mg per slice as opposed to American cheese which contains 368mg per slice!
Here's a link for sodium content in popular types of cheeses:
Sodium in Cheese

Pass up the canned soup aisle and start making your own soup. One can of Campbell's Chicken Noodle soup has 1,081mg of sodium; Broccoli Cheese soup has 1,500mg of sodium. There goes your entire daily allotment of sodium!

When cooking at home, we all add salt. Stop! Instead of adding salt to your tomato sauce while you're cooking it, add it at the very end or once it's on your plate. You will use half the amount. Another way to cut your sodium intake when cooking is to discover spices!
Mrs. Dash has a variety of different (salt free!) herb and spice mixes that add a lot of flavor to foods. I have about 30 different spices in my cabinet and the more I use them, the more I learn how to mix them in different combinations for different flavors. I cook with a LOT of onions, garlic, and ginger, too. Ingredients like lemon zest, balsamic and flavored vinegars, fresh herbs will give your palate a chance to shed its salt addiction – your preference for salt can be unlearned. Your taste buds are reawakened. Within days, they start enjoying new flavors and flavor combinations.

One more thing I will add is this: We all know that salt is a big cause of water retention, and water retention elevates our blood pressure. If you want to get rid of water... drum roll... drink more water! Why? The more you take in, the more you put out! Drinking water keeps your kidneys active and it flushes all the unwanted sodium out of your system.
Note: Soda, and many flavored drinks (especially sports drinks), even 'healthy' drinks contain sodium. For instance, Crystal Light -- many flavors, including the Energy Wild Strawberry and Raspberry Ice, contain no sodium, according to the nutrition labels. Some, including Pomegranate Cherry, contain 10 mg per serving. The highest sodium content is 35 mg per serving in the Natural Lemonade flavored drink mix. Even the V8 Splash drinks have about 15mg per 8 ounce serving. Stick with natural fruit juices - orange juice has about 2mg of sodium.

See where I am heading with this? You can cut your sodium intake in half if you just make a few simple changes in what you eat. Then, you can 'treat' yourself to a few chips now and then.
Learn to read labels, and keep in mind the amount of sodium listed is the amount in ONE serving.

Avoid salt substitutes! Salt substitutes are not a healthful option for everyone. Many salt substitutes contain potassium chloride in place of sodium chloride. Potassium consumed in excess may be harmful for some people. For example, many persons with kidney problems are unable to rid their bodies of excessive potassium, which could result in a deadly situation. If you have kidney problems or are on medication for your heart, kidneys or liver, it is best to check with your physician before using salt substitutes in place of sodium.
And if you are using substitutes, they are just mimicking the flavor of salt and will not eliminate your craving for it.

Write down how much sodium to consume every day. You don't have to go 'cold-turkey' (but if you do, be sure the turkey is fresh and not processed! LOL). Gradually cut down and you'll find yourself saying, "OMG! I can't eat that! It is way too salty!"

I hope this has given you some ideas on how to adjust your sodium intake and retrain your tastebuds!

I recommend making your own soups anyway. When you do that you know exactly what's in the soup. AWM is allergic to onions, but a lot of pre-processed products sneak onions in under the heading "spices" so you can't always tell by reading the label.

There are so many things blooming out in the yard! Also the clovers we planted are coming up... just not where we meant them too just yet. It is windier here than I anticipated.

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The only thing that bloomed in our yard was the amaryllis that I planted years ago (and thought was dead because it hasn't bloomed since). The late frost that woke the amaryllis killed everything else--the blueberries, pears, ornamental plum, etc.

I'm new here but I scrolled back a bit because I find other peoples lives and thoughts fascinating. Always looking for ways to broaden my horizon

This morning I read an article about the negative side of positive thinking. Most of its source material came from an exposé written by Barbara Ehrenreich. Basically the author asserts that pathological positivity "encourages us to deny reality, submit cheerfully to misfortune, and blame only ourselves for our fate.” She goes onto say that unhinged optimism promotes the idea that , “either you look on the bright side, constantly adjusting your attitude and revising your perceptions–or you go over to the dark side.” ...and that kinda thinking can lead to terrible disappointment and more unnecessary pain.

I agree with a lot of what was written, as I wish to seek a balance in the way I respond to my circumstances. I've noticed that the alternative ways of interpreting reality invoke rather interesting responses from the eternally optimistic-positive-thinking-cures-all crowd Don't get me wrong, I admire some of the qualities in those who are capable of consistently feeling that way but not everyone is wired to compartmentalize like that. It's a blessing not afforded to everyone.

Another thing I thought about today was how I'm going to behave after I bring my cat home on Monday. I'm worried that my anxious energy will make kitty nervous or make her want to hide from me -- which is ok, because I'd want to hide too if I were in a new, unfamiliar environment. I know the adjustment period from being in a shelter to going to a forever home has gotta be tough and I plan on giving her the time and space she needs.

Practical thinking with a positive outlook is more beneficial I think. Back when I still had the Achieva (it had to be retired to a junkyard) the car broke down on a regular basis and due to the work schedules of everyone else (I was looking for work at the time) it would sometimes be hours before someone came to pick me up or help with the car. What did I do? I packed a "break-down" bag with books, flashlight, a blanket that I could just toss over the trunk of the car for something to lie on, snacks, and heat-resistant drinks.

 

[tallyollyopia]

Interesting outlook. I myself tend to wobble between pessimist and realist ("The glass is half empty" and "Water's at the halfway point, where's the faucet?") but I have heard that when things go wrong, outsiders that are into positive thinking actually blame the person. "You should have had a better outlook, being negative is probably why (insert negative here)" is one such example. Another is "I focused on the positives and that's why I didn't (insert negative here), you should try it so it doesn't happen again to you".

But while a positive mindset can mitigate things a little bit, it can only do so much. Yeah, there's a few studies that suggest a positive outlook might bolster the immune system just a tad, but there's others that have found no connection and no one is sure if the relationship is causal or coincidental. And even if it's causal, it could equally be that the slightly more effective immune system is what's driving the mindset.

When looking at the social aspect of positive thinking, it can be the worst cruelty. A common example is telling an infertile woman that she just needs to relax because other women have had surprise pregnancies after giving up and relaxing. That's basically blaming the woman for not being able to conceive because she's not positive enough. I've heard of similar statements to cancer survivors, that other people with the same exact cancer kept a good outlook and that's why it stayed in remission. So it's the cancer survivor's fault if it comes back because the mindset wasn't right.

The flip side of it is not the suggestion, but the open statement. For example, the poor are poor because they just don't try hard enough because one (in my opinion lucky) person started out poor but managed to rise above that. The reality is that a fair amount of luck is needed, right place at the right time, and everyone's internal resources are different. If you biologically need one extra hour of sleep, that could prevent the same exact work/study/sleep schedule that another person adhered to in order to progress. If you apply for a scholarship at the wrong time, you don't have the money another person received to pay for schooling. If your glasses break, that's an expense the other person didn't have, and your ability to travel and study is also affected in a way the other person's wasn't.

So yeah, positive thinking can be nice, if there's a heavy dose of realistic thinking to keep it in check. Without the realistic thinking the social consequences can be severe.



My best suggestion is to find an outlet for that anxious energy. I'm not talking big, like cycling for an hour, but something small like a fidget thingy that's all the rage now. Something to focus the mind and keep the hands busy. That will dampen the vibes you give out. Beyond that, the cat's personality will be the main denominator. I one time brought home a shelter cat and within hours he was Mr. Confident and owned the house and the other two cats.

I can't agree with you more. I can't tell you how many times I've heard, "You should be able to do it because so-and-so did."

When Pretzel came home with us she was extremely anxious. Then she started exploring and discovered the kitchen. Oh, good! There will actually be food! Happy, happy, joy, joy! And from then on she was okay. It really does depend on the cat.

Some illnesses seem to foster mindsets that contribute to the illness, and if you're able to counter the mindset your chance of surviving is significantly improved, but still not guaranteed. There's good research about the use of things like meditation to help with cancer, for instance, but it's not like it's a miracle cure-all. And some of the meditation tapes they sell for patients are incredibly dangerous, IMO. Many years ago I had a friend named Barb with terminal cancer, and a mutual friend and I went looking for a good meditation tape for her. We found one, specifically labeled for cancer patients, and bought it. Then we had the good sense to listen to it before we gave it to Barb. This tape started out by saying that the very fact that you have this tape means that you're ready to heal, and therefore will heal, because we "choose" everything that comes to us. Really?! Barb chose cancer? I don't think so! For that matter, Barb was also a rape survivor. She was only in our city because the man who raped her was a big mucky-muck in city government where she came from, and she had been forced to leave town after he raped her. And the only part of that that Barb chose was surviving.

When my father was dying of cancer I was a member of a support group for caregivers. One of the women there was having trouble understanding why she got so angry when a "friend" of hers complimented her. What was the compliment? "Oh, I admire you so much! You're so strong! God never gives us more than we can carry, so you must be strong, what with the way you're helping your mother deal with her cancer. I could never be that strong!" Translation: Your mother has cancer because God is rewarding you for being strong, and I don't have to worry that something like that will happen to me because I'm not strong. No wonder it made her angry.

Margret

I found a bumper sticker I liked. (I bought it in case I ever get another car.) It says, "If God never gives us more than we can handle, God must think I'm a bad@$$."

God never gives us more than we can carry. Those are probably the most dangerous words in existence. So very many people endure something that they can't handle and the fallout is ugly.

The absolutely most extreme example of this that I can think of is that Andrea Yates' pdoc told Rusty Yates to never get her pregnant again, the PPS was getting more and more severe with each delivery and she was going to go completely crazy with another pregnancy. And good old god-fearing Rusty said those exact same words and got Andrea pregnant again and five innocent children were lost to her psychosis.

I hate those words. I absolutely hate them.

In that case, I'd have to say it wasn't God giving her the burden.

There's a certain mindset in religion that says:

• If you're rich it means you're good and God is rewarding you.
• If you're poor it means you're evil, lazy, or otherwise unworthy, so God is punishing you.
• If you're sick it means that God is testing you; if you only have enough faith you will survive. Unless it means that you're evil and God is punishing you, in which case you'll prove God to be right by not having enough faith to survive.
• All hardship is a test from God, and a chance to prove that your virtue, but no matter how many tests you pass, all it takes is one failure to prove that you're evil.
• There are no shades of gray. You're either good or evil, and strength = goodness and weakness = evil.

I say "religion" rather than "Christianity" because I strongly suspect that something like this shows up occasionally in all religions. And no matter what nominal religion a person is, this particular mindset is calculated to make it okay to be uncharitable, in all senses of the word. It's an easy way to avoid loving your neighbor as yourself and to justify greed and smugness, but sooner or later karma rises up and bites people who think this way on the ass. (I mean "karma" in the common Western usage -- people get what they give.) Because, sooner or later, we all experience hardship of some kind, and if we're very fortunate we have enough loving friends to either help us survive it or at least make our passing easier.

Margret

I've done research on other religions/cultures, and I've found variations of that theme in just about every one I researched. One of the most insidious was one that claimed that this life is a punishment for the sins committed in the last life.