surprise aggression

[folkpunk]

Hi! I am new to this site, but I am super desperate for some help. I adopted a cat from a local shelter about three months ago, he is a year and a half old. He is typically an extremely sweet boy, until he isn't. If he doesn't get his way he will attack, but I can typically see the signs and fend him off. He will just sit down and stare and then his eyes will dilate and his tail will start switching- this is when I know I have to start watching him. I can usually grab him by the scruff and support him at on his back feet and make him stare at me to show him he is not alpha and typically after a while he backs down. Although I have a friend and every time she comes over he is extremely aggressive towards her in particular. She won't even be doing anything and he goes right for her face/shoulders with no warning signs. She does have a male cat at home and he just got fixed (Mouse, my cat was fixed when I picked him up from the shelter), I know before this her cat had a problem spraying. He doesn't do this to any one else really. I am at a point though that I am really scared that he is going to seriously hurt someone because it just comes out of nowhere sometimes. I really don't know what to do and if I can't find a solution soon I will have to take him back to the shelter, but I really don't want to because I really love him. If anybody had any thoughts on what I could do to help this I would be so thankful. 

PS: I've read a lot about aggression on cats online and I know that a big thing is play because the cat is bored, but I really don't feel like this is the issue- especially since he really targets my friend or tends to do it when he isn't getting his way. I just need him to not think he is the alpha in the house, but I don't know how to do that. 

 

[manemelissa]

Sounds like redirected aggression. If it seems like nothing is happening around the time a cat attacks, and it seems to come out of nowhere, it's most likely redirected aggression. Meaning, there is something triggering it that you're not aware of. In this case, you've already kind of pinpointed it-- your friend's cat. He's smelling your friend's cat on her and is thinking this cat is trying to invade his territory. With no cat to attack, he attacks the next best thing-- the person that smells like him. Intact (not neutered) males can be even worse for another cat to smell, so this may also ease up since the other cat has been recently neutered.

I would stop with the scruffing/staring thing. It's probably only making your cat more insecure and frightened. Instead of challenging your cat, why not try slow blinking at him when he appears agitated? Slow blinking at a cat can sometimes calm them down and show that you aren't a threat.

I would separate your cat into another room when your friend comes over. If that's not something you can do, you can try to ask your friend to come in clean clothes that haven't had her cat on them to cut down on some of her cat's smell. However, she's still gonna smell like him. Has she tried feeding him? Associating the smell of the other cat and her with something pleasant like food may help your cat be calmer around her.

A little article on redirected aggression from this site:

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/re-directed-aggression-in-cats