Hello to all, I just started a new thread instead of bumping old one, brief history is there was a feral male cat at my job, that over almost a year time I tamed down to "pet" status , I took him to be neutered, and to a new home 30 miles from my job, in 3 weeks time he made it back to my job, thinking he came back to me, I took him home ( although I have extremely small place, and 3 well adjusted cats here already, which is why I had not chosen to take home to begin with ) I had a giant crate set up for 1st night, and part of first day, he managed to push his way out when i opened it next day, but made it clear he did not plan on leaving me, so I started letting him have quite a bit of free time outside of crate, my 3 were not that upset, my 2 boys did a lot of hissing/growling when he got close, and Andy my new boy basically acted like they were not there, after a day or two he started puffing back up at them, when they directly threatened him.
I have had him about 2 weeks, and one day, there was one fight that broke out between my older male, and Andy that resulted in some tufts of hair, but no blood, or scratches, Andy has become extremely playful, but just with himself, and leaves, sticks, etc. he cannot figure out how to play with toys, me, or the other cats, but I have seen him attempt to play with my older 2 boys, and they FREAK out thinking he is trying to attack them, so they growl, hiss even more, instead of getting better it seems their relationship is getting more tense, tonight I think ( did not see start of it ) Andy charged me younger boy, really scaring him, I do not believe it was play, but I scolded Andy and he ran out , and started being silly , and playing, and then a few minutes later I heard an altercation between my older male , and Andy, with Andy running to hide when I yelled, my resident 3 are still eating, and mostly acting normal, but my younger male that seems the most upset has been staying hidden, and acting reclusive , while Andy acts quite bold, and confident, which he has actually been almost since day 1, I am feeling guilty that my 3 are being made to feel like this, and Andy generally has been a very good boy, I would have a very hard time rehoming him, as it would have to be somewhere I am 110% sure would keep him in, until he adjusted to someone/somewhere new, or I am afraid he would try to return, if he made it 30 miles over unknown territory, he may try again from even farther, I am in a rural , farming area where most ppl consider cats just outdoor/barn pest control, or to be shot, so finding a suitable home would be super tough, and risky.
I have thought about the reintroduction , separating phase, but feel like we are past that, since often the interactions are neutral, or good with at least attempts to play, but again , I feel like the negative episodes are too common, and not improving, in some ways they are becoming more confrontational since Andy at times is starting to display aggression, perhaps because he is getting more confident in his "new" territory, I guess I may be expecting too much for being 2 weeks into it, but am counting on this to work, he has been neutered about 6 weeks now, not sure if maybe some of the tom cat is still in him, I just do not want the aggression on his part to increase or I know it will never work, my resident cats I know will get used to him, and accept him, sorry this is long, something I found VERY odd tonight was usually Andy is very bold, and confident by himself, sits in my doorway, first to come in, or go out, but when he charged my younger boy tonight, which again seemed aggressive , and not play charge, I scolded him, and shooed him away, and then a few minutes later he , and my older boy were having a showdown that I heard, but did not see, Andy acted scared, and took off, even when i kept trying to catch him to put in him "time out" he was running from me, which he has NEVER done, except when he was still very feral, and I had not done anything to make him act like that.
I have had him about 2 weeks, and one day, there was one fight that broke out between my older male, and Andy that resulted in some tufts of hair, but no blood, or scratches, Andy has become extremely playful, but just with himself, and leaves, sticks, etc. he cannot figure out how to play with toys, me, or the other cats, but I have seen him attempt to play with my older 2 boys, and they FREAK out thinking he is trying to attack them, so they growl, hiss even more, instead of getting better it seems their relationship is getting more tense, tonight I think ( did not see start of it ) Andy charged me younger boy, really scaring him, I do not believe it was play, but I scolded Andy and he ran out , and started being silly , and playing, and then a few minutes later I heard an altercation between my older male , and Andy, with Andy running to hide when I yelled, my resident 3 are still eating, and mostly acting normal, but my younger male that seems the most upset has been staying hidden, and acting reclusive , while Andy acts quite bold, and confident, which he has actually been almost since day 1, I am feeling guilty that my 3 are being made to feel like this, and Andy generally has been a very good boy, I would have a very hard time rehoming him, as it would have to be somewhere I am 110% sure would keep him in, until he adjusted to someone/somewhere new, or I am afraid he would try to return, if he made it 30 miles over unknown territory, he may try again from even farther, I am in a rural , farming area where most ppl consider cats just outdoor/barn pest control, or to be shot, so finding a suitable home would be super tough, and risky.
I have thought about the reintroduction , separating phase, but feel like we are past that, since often the interactions are neutral, or good with at least attempts to play, but again , I feel like the negative episodes are too common, and not improving, in some ways they are becoming more confrontational since Andy at times is starting to display aggression, perhaps because he is getting more confident in his "new" territory, I guess I may be expecting too much for being 2 weeks into it, but am counting on this to work, he has been neutered about 6 weeks now, not sure if maybe some of the tom cat is still in him, I just do not want the aggression on his part to increase or I know it will never work, my resident cats I know will get used to him, and accept him, sorry this is long, something I found VERY odd tonight was usually Andy is very bold, and confident by himself, sits in my doorway, first to come in, or go out, but when he charged my younger boy tonight, which again seemed aggressive , and not play charge, I scolded him, and shooed him away, and then a few minutes later he , and my older boy were having a showdown that I heard, but did not see, Andy acted scared, and took off, even when i kept trying to catch him to put in him "time out" he was running from me, which he has NEVER done, except when he was still very feral, and I had not done anything to make him act like that.
