spicy kitty need advice

[caity_bean]

hi! my partner and i just got a new kitten jasper. he’s 2 months old and we’ve had him in the home for less than a week. he is a sweet but chaotic baby w kitten energy.
since he’s a kitten we are introducing him to our friends cuz who doesn’t love kittens and when we do this we say please don’t play with the kitten using ur hands as the toy or he’ll think ur hands are toys or play with him too aggressively because we don’t want him to think it’s ok. one of our friends didn’t listen and now he loves biting hands and plays quite rough now so yay.
my issue now is we have 3 other cats 3yrs(M) 1 1/2(F) and 11m(M). with our 11m old cat rudy he’s been quite playful w jasper through the door and is doing well w peeking in the door crack at jasper so we thought hey let’s let them meet for little in our room play for a bit, because rudy seems ready, and put jasper back in the bathroom when it becomes to much. we let jasper out and he is doing fine for about 5 seconds. he then proceeds to chase rudy (which is normal) but then when he gets to rudy he will latch on to rudy, bite down hard, and make these aggressive long meows w airplane ears when biting on rudy and back kicking his stomach. meanwhile rudy is hissing and trying to get jasper off of him and jasper seems to not listen nor care and keeps coming after rudy doing the same thing. we separated them and we tried again after a couple of hours but it was the same thing.
so my question is do we just let rudy and other cats (when their ready) teach jasper that’s not ok or can we step in and also teach jasper? we aren’t quite sure what to do because if we don’t let jasper socialize w the cats how will he learn to not do that but if we do socialize him he’ll get beat up and possibly a fight might break out. also see below the cutie patootie below

 

[Alldara]

When I am stopping a kitten from doing something to another cat I sit myself down by the other cat and just use one hand on the kitten's chest to stop it from going in the direction of the other cat.

This works best if your RC isn't running obviously.

As for biting, make a loud, high pitched EEP sound when he bites. This is the same sound another kitten would make and he should be very surprised by it.

He will need a kicker toy or something similar to get that wrestle energy out on. I recommend one of those obnoxious holiday oven mitts as you can slip your hand in and out of it to entice him, but nots not hand shaped or textured. If he gets your skin, your arm or something, EEP immediately and halt playing for a moment.

During face to face introductions, the initial goal is to do something with the cats. Food time, play time are excellent times because you don't want them hyperfocused on one another. You want them doing something together, in a parallel-play style. Letting them exist without a plan or some style of enrichment together is end-game things.

 

[caity_bean]

the loud eep is a good idea! we’ve been doing this thing where we’ll play w jasper and when he starts to get bity we take remove the toy and put our hands under our arm pits and then we see him winding up to go for our hands but he’ll usually just lunge lightly and then go do something else and when he does that we bring the toy back out but i like the eep
as for the face to face we did try toys but jasper just had his eyes set on rudy like toys he did not care for even when rudy would his and growl jasper was like i don’t care i’m coming for u haha so that’s what kinda concerning

 

[cmshap]

the loud eep is a good idea!

I had to do the same thing with my cat, Willy. He was not a kitten when I took him in as a stray (he was just shy of 1 year old), but he had been on his own for a while, and he learned play habits, for better or worse, from me.

I had never had a cat before, and I taught him some bad habits by playing with him using my hands. He wasn't too bitey/scratchey at first, so it was cute and fun... until it wasn't.

I then started getting serious about educating myself about cat care and behavior, when it was clear he was going to stay with me for life, and I realized my mistakes. I had to untrain this hand-attacking behavior.

Of course, I provided him with tons of toys, and tried using toys to distract him when he got in an aggressive-play mood, but he'd still go after my hands. I would shout "NO," then immediately put him down on the floor, stop all play, and ignore him for a while. If he jumped back up on my lap, I'd keep putting him down on the floor again.

This took some time, but it worked.

 

[caity_bean]

thank u for the advice! and i agree it is cute but i know in a year or two it’s not gonna be fun hahaha

 

[Alldara]

caity_bean I can understand the concern but it's really normal behavior. That's why I suggest just using your body to block and grab a toy with your second hand. The hyperfocus behavior will go away after dinner time.

The kitten is wound up from being alone and in a small space. Can you take him to your bedroom for a closed door play session before intros?

He's a kitten, so he doesn't understand 'no' yet. That's why I suggest the EEP sound. I also do not recommend ignoring as you may find, as some do, that the behaviour just escalates as he learns you eventually have to do something if he does enough things. He's engaging in normal kitten behaviour that all kittens need to grow out of. A loud sharp EEP should make him pause, wait a moment and then resume play. EEP again if needed. You can walk away if he does it again, but if he follows and tries to engage in a new or gentle behaviour, you'll want to reward that with attention.

Ghost was really rough with feet when he first got him. He's 2 approximately last May. It didn't take more than a few weeks. My wife had to go "Eeep Eeep eeeeep!" At him a few times too. (Think like a yip a dog makes when injured)

Occasionally, my boys are still young and I might hear them EEP at each other or they get too excited and I have to EEP. The bonus is that I can do it if I watch them get rough with a guest too. You said yourself you might not always be able to get a guest to disengage.

 

[caity_bean]

yes! i’m gonna try that instead of the hand blocking thing the eep seems to be more effective! and r u suggesting doing a play session w the kitten before we bring the other cats into the room for introductions?

 

[Mamanyt1953]

Eeping is incredibIy effective, as is hissing, which is what Mamacat wouId be doing with a rambunctious kitten. And you get street cred for knowing the Ianguage (or so I teII myseIf)! A sharp hiss wiII stiII stop my 15-year-oId girI in her tracks, aIthough she wiII taIk back at me!

 

[Alldara]

yes! i’m gonna try that instead of the hand blocking thing the eep seems to be more effective! and r u suggesting doing a play session w the kitten before we bring the other cats into the room for introductions?

Yes. A big one then start with food together when kitten is nice and hungry.