Someone you love owes you money

[clairebear]

If you need the money badly tell the person that, if they care about you they'll do their best to pay you back.

 

[mbjerkness]

My BIL has done this several times to my DH. He never pays it back, It upsets me ( hurts my feelings), it doesn't seem to bother DH. We are always there for him, It isn't the money for me, it is the lack of respect.

 

[theimp98]

Originally Posted by GoldenKitty45

I say only loan money if you can afford NOT to get it back!

yep.


anyway, i would guess they are still having money issues. or they would have paid you back

 

[mrblanche]

Originally Posted by cococat

Someone I love and am close to (family) owes me money. They have for 2 months. I need this money really bad. I have called them, they say they will send it but never do.
What would you do?

I would tell them to consider it a gift, but to never ask you for money again until it's paid back, since you can only afford to make that kind of gift once.

 

[cococat]

Originally Posted by mrblanche

I would tell them to consider it a gift, but...

That is along the lines of what my husband said. I can't just drop it or let it go, well - I can and will-, but I do want to mention to this individual what is going on in my head and how things will be handled from now on. This person likes to live their life with a least conflict as possible, so do I, it would be easy to brush this off and never say a word about it, but instead I will do the thing I don't want to do, talk about it

and let them know I don't expect repayment anymore, but also let them know how things will be from now on. It would be so much easier just to ignore it, but ignoring things doesn't make them go away all of the time.

 

[rone]

Originally Posted by cococat

It would be so much easier just to ignore it, but ignoring things doesn't make them go away all of the time.

I sympathize with you. After being burnt so many times by siblings I find it easiest to just say no. Or if it's urgent, I only loaned what I can afford not to get it back.

I'm the only one married in the family (has one younger sis & bro), mom & dad seem to think since we have double income therefore we can afford to live more comfortably. Every time when any family member ask us for help and get a no for answer, their first response was "how can you not have money?"

 

[rapunzel47]

Originally Posted by mrblanche

I would tell them to consider it a gift, but to never ask you for money again until it's paid back, since you can only afford to make that kind of gift once.

I was going to organize my thoughts on this and post a reply, but I really like this approach, so I'm just going to say

 

[cococat]

Originally Posted by Rone

I'm the only one married in the family...their first response was "how can you not have money?"

Same here but really it just means you have way more of all types of expenses!

 

[jugen]

Oh hon,
I've been there lots and since my sis doesn't work and was having issues, we went to support her during a hard time and thus gave her some money. Well the next week she called and was saying how she didn't have food or litter for her cats even though we bought her 50 pounds of each and she only had 2 cats at the time. I was upset that she'd even pull that trick knowing that I'd help her out with her cats and kids, but apparently she didn't think about how it'd only been a week since we got her all that food and litter. So now she gets Christmas and birthday gift cards for her for clothing stores and pet stores and the kids get gift cards too. I won't be wasting money on her extravagances anymore. She needs to get a job and pay for her stuff herself.