Semi-feral Heeellpp

[caelesto]

Eleven was living outside my apartment building and though she was always kind of skittish, after a few weeks of feeding her, she became extremely affectionate with me. So when I found out she was pregnant, I managed to catch her and get her to the home of a friend until she had her kittens and then she could get all her shots and get spayed. My plan was that when all that was done and the kittens were adopted, I would take her back and try to keep her inside.

Well she's been in my apartment for 2 weeks and she doesn't remember me at all, which I didn't expect her to, especially after what must have been a confusing and scary couple months away. But she's been content hanging out in the bedroom.

But then this evening after I fed her, the door didn't latch when I closed it, and I didn't realize it until after she nudged it open. She took a few steps out of the bedroom, had a sniff of one of my cats--no hostility or hissing at all--but she was super nervous and went back in the bedroom, and I shut the door and I thought she was ok. A little more skittish than she had been the last 2 weeks, but ok.

Eleven is not ok. She is super distressed, and she won't stop howling, and I don't know what to do. If I stay in the room with her, she howls. If I leave her alone to give her space, she howls at the door. It's been hours, and she won't stop, and I feel terrible, but nothing I do seems to help. There's no consoling her. I'm going out of my mind and I feel like a fool for thinking I could do this, part of me feels like I should have just left her to have her kittens outside.

I have no support, no one to help me at home. Do I leave her to howl until she eventually tires herself out and calms down on her own? Do I stay in the room with her even though she doesn't trust me and is still afraid of me?

I'd appreciate any suggestions/advice. Please!!!

 

[elliesvictim]

There are articles about feral cat adoption available online if you have time.
The main gist seems to be not to engage until the cat realises she's not in danger.
The howling is her vocalising "I'm scared". Leave her be until it passes. Don't engage her, don't touch her and don't talk to her. Anything you do will be viewed as a threat. She should calm and will engage you when she's ready.
Obviously the experience has upset her so be patient and try not to let the howling get to you.
Good luck.

 

[caelesto]

Reaching the 24 hour mark and she's still howling. I feel like a failure for wanting to give up and throw her out. I feel like I am regretting this every second of every day and that makes me feel like a horrible selfish person.

 

[caelesto]

So after all that, it turns out Eleven really just wanted out of her room.

I've been letting her out for as long as she wants, letting her go back to her room when she's had enough or is getting too nervous. It's never longer than five minutes, and she actually prefers to wander around with my 2 cats in the room as opposed to me shutting them in the bathroom. Harley and Ivy have not warmed to her yet, but it's still early days. I'm letting Eleven set the pace. And feeling much better about the situation. Thank you elliesvictim for your input!