Scary stray cat aggression to my other cats

[mojoseph]

We have two cats: Mostly Feral, as shy as she sounds, and Drama, a laid back, but vocal male. This August, a pregnant stray showed up. We didn't want to start a feral colony, so we housed mama in the spare room until she had her babies, all four of which we found homes for.

She is at the vet being spayed today. Here is my worry. She has been brutally aggressive to our two cats. We thought once the kittens were gone, she might calm down, but she hasn't. She can sort of tolerate our male, but I caught her yesterday preparing to attack him while he slept -- back arched, fur on end, ears back. It takes no provocation. She attacks our female still on sight and these are not squabbles, she is deadly serious.

Is there any hope that after her spay, she might come around?

I am attached to her, she is the sweetest cat to humans and has zero aggression toward people. She is good with children and never minded total strangers handling her kitties.
But she is stressing me out to the point I can't relax in my own home. She is either out and the other two are shut up and begging to be out or she is locked in her room and trying to get out. We even have to lock the bedroom door from the inside because she can open it. (We have to pick the lock to feed her.)

Exhausting!

I might be just venting, but any advice would be great. I ordered a Feliway diffuser that should arrive tomorrow.

Another problem is that Drama can forgive anyone anything and would be fine if Mama would, but Mostly Feral absolutely hates and fears her now, so it isn't just a matter of Mama coming around, it is Mostly ever getting over her several beat downs.

 

[shadowsrescue]

Did you do proper cat to cat introductions or just allow the cats to get to know each other on their own?  It makes a big difference.  Cats are very territorial by nature and will do anything to protect their space.  Mama was heightened because of her kittens as well as her hormones.  She should settle down somewhat once her hormones shut down.  That will take a few weeks. 

Feliway diffusers are great.  Just be sure you have enough.  Sometimes you will need two or more depending on the lay out of your home.  Composure liquid Max works very well to help calm aggressive cats.  It does not sedate them but instead helps the cat to feel more calm and in control of their bodies.  You can mix it into their wet food 2x a day.  Amazon has the best price.

Here are a few links and a video on cat to cat introductions.  If you follow the plan, it will greatly help the situation.  Yet it takes time.  Some cats like each other right from the start.  Other times cats have difficulties.  Last year when I brought a feral into my home, introductions between my resident cat and the feral took 6 months.  I made a huge mistake and rushed the process at the end.  I so wanted them out and about together.  It backfired on me and the process seemed never ending.  Yet, I stuck with the process and at exactly the one year mark there was peace in my home.  The two cats now play and like to hang out together.  You just need lots and patience and time. 

http://www.catbehaviorassociates.com/a-simple-little-trick-to-use-during-new-cat-introductions/

http://www.aspca.org/pet-care/virtual-pet-behaviorist/cat-behavior/introducing-your-cat-new-cat

http://jacksongalaxy.com/2010/10/01/cat-to-cat-introductions/

http://www.thecatsite.com/a/introducing-cats-to-cats

 

[p3 and the king]

To be honest, Feliway doesn't work for everyone and every situation.  But it can't hurt to try it.  I've never had results with it.  I do get good results from the calming collar, though. 

She may calm down a little after spay.  Some of her "attitude" may be due to hormones.  But it won't be instant.  It takes about a month for the hormones to leave her system.  In that time, try to keep her separated and calm.   Work on building her confidence and getting her OK with you, and the home.  Ferals or semi ferals have a different language and system than indoor cats and it can be a lot more work to get them to coexists peacefully.  It's not impossible, though.  Just take it slow and don't push them too hard.  It's their time table, not yours. 

You can try positive reinforcements with food or play. 

 

[mojoseph]

Thank-you for all the advice. No, we did not do any kind of introducing. We are admittedly cat idiots as far as behavior issues.

I've had cats on and off all my life, every one a stray. Besides initial obligatory hissing, everyone eventually either became buddies or ignored each other with icy disdain.

We've dealt with the occasional "Smack, smack, run. Stop. Lick hindquarters with studied unconcern" but the determined and violent assaults of Mama were a real shock.

When she showed up in August and we realized our latest very, very young stray was also pregnant, we let her live in the garage until the vet X-rays showed spines, then popped her in the spare room until she had the babies. My very, very first kitty birth.

Then we just let everyone out in turn, both because of her aggression and the unknown of our cats' reaction to the kittens.

Now for the real kicker. We took her to get spayed Tuesday and they said she was too full of milk to do the surgery. Then they said "We also think she might be pregnant again."

We assured them there was no way. Nope. None. Then we remembered the day we realized she could open her own bedroom door. She was out of her room when we got home and bolted outside when the kittens were young. Once.

Another X-ray ordered. No spines. (Duh, she's not even showing).

But.. I think we are going to have her spayed next week anyway. I feel horrible. I just can't do it again. And she's so young herself.

I never knew cats could be so stressful and heart-wrenching.