Sabrina

[jillsmo]

Hello! I'm brand new here, my friend Juleska recommended I join, because I just adopted a 9 month old stray from a local shelter and am working on integrating her into our home. I have 2 cats already, both outdoor, one of which is exclusively outdoor (his choice) and 2 kids. 

So far I've established a "base camp," which is the closet in my bedroom, and since I brought her home 2 days ago (almost exactly 48 hours as I write this) she hasn't left the closet at all. She eats at night when I'm sleeping, she's been using the litterbox appropriately, but she's SO shy and timid, she hasn't been showing any interest in venturing out during the day at all. I've been doing my best to leave her alone, I go in there about once an hour and give her a finger to sniff, which she does. She let me rub her chin once but otherwise I can't get any closer. I've been doing that "slow blink" thing and one time she closed her eyes for me.

Anyway, I welcome any advice anybody has. I know that patience is the key and I also know that I totally lack it right now, so this is a challenge for me. Also I've never done anything like this before so I feel really out of my element, which is why my friend suggested I join here, so I can have one place to gather your suggestions, have something to refer back to, and also chart progress.

Thanks!

 

[artiemom]

Welcome to TCS!!  There are plenty of people who have experience with what you are currently experiencing...

I have never had to isolate a cat..only one cat at a time..so I cannot speak from personal experience.

But I think you just need the patience that Juleska has advised...

It has only been 2 days!! Two who days for your new kitty to get adapted to an entirely new environment...take it slow and easy...

The good thing is that she is eating and pottying appropriately,....that is huge!!

What you could do is to spend some time in the same room. Sit and read; read to her..talk to her..let her get used to your voice. 

You are doing great!! Seriously!! I mean it....

There will be more people coming on here to help you..but these are just a couple of things that I thought of...

slow and easy is the way to go!!!

 

[margd]

Welcome to TCS and congratulations on your new family member! 

   It is not at all unusual for a new kitty to stay in her safe area for several days, even weeks, if they are extremely shy.  You are doing the right thing in letting Sabrina come to you, but there are some things you can do that will help her feel more secure.

When you visit her, sit at her level and talk to her.  Don't look directly in her eyes very often as she might feel intimidated by that.  Read to her if you run out of things to say.

You want her to associate you with good things, so take treats with you.  At first, put them right in front of her but over time, move them closer and closer to you until she follows.

Since she is so shy and anxious, a calming aid might be helpful.  

*Feliway is one such product available as a spray or plug in diffuser.  It's based on pheromones that cats emit when they are feeling calm and happy.   http://www.feliway.com/us/Feliway   Amazon reportedly has the cheapest prices.

 *Composure is another calming aid, available as a treat or liquid.  http://www.vetriscience.com/index.php?l=product_detail&p=9008103030

 *Rescue Remedy is available as drops - many members have had good luck with this: http://www.bachflower.com/rescue-remedy-pet/

Playing is one of the best things you can do to bond with your Sabrina.  At first, you can use something as simple as pulling a string around to get her attention (be sure to keep the string out of reach when you're not there.)  You can also give her a stuffed toy to keep her company - if she likes catnip, one containing catnip is a good choice.

The following articles might help:
[article="32804"]How To Help A New Cat Adjust To Your Home  [/article][article="32735"]10 Must Know Tips For Happy Living With A Shy Cat  [/article]
You will also need to go through an introduction process with the indoor/outdoor cat.  The following article describes how to do that.
[article="32680"]How To Successfully Introduce Cats The Ultimate Guide  [/article]
Hopefully I have not overwhelmed you with all of this!  It sounds like you are off to a good start and hopefully Miss Sabrina will be out and playing in no time!  

 

[jillsmo]

Thank you! This isn't overwhelming at all. So far she's been up on the shelf, in the back, so it's hard for me to get on the same level. I put a chair in there so I can stand on it to get up to her, and I go in there every hour or so. In the meantime I'm spending all my time right outside the closet, in my bedroom, moving around, talking, and singing

 

[artiemom]

You are doing a great job....it will be no time before she is coming out to play with you...and to get the treats!!

 

[margd]

 
Thank you! This isn't overwhelming at all. So far she's been up on the shelf, in the back, so it's hard for me to get on the same level. I put a chair in there so I can stand on it to get up to her, and I go in there every hour or so. In the meantime I'm spending all my time right outside the closet, in my bedroom, moving around, talking, and singing

It sounds like you're doing all the right things.  Fingers crossed that she emerges soon! 

 

[juleska]

Yay! Jillsmo's here!

Yeah I've been peppering her with advice on various Facebook comment threads and thought it was getting hard to keep track of everything. Plus I know this community is super knowledgeable and would be able to help her more than I can on my own.

 

[jillsmo]

So I'm sitting here at 1:30am, and she has suddenly decided that tonight is her time to emerge from her closet. She came out briefly and sniffed around, and then ran back to her shelf. It's been about 30 minutes since that happened and she's on her shelf, occasionally meowing. When she does that I talk back to her in my best "talking to a toddler" voice... (soft) "hi, you... hey. How are you? Do you want to come out?" etc. How can I help her be more comfortable?

 

[juleska]

The fact that she came out (even briefly) while you're awake and that she is now vocalizing is progress!

 

[jillsmo]

She's been hissing at me a lot today It's hard not to take that personally

 

[margd]

Don't worry.  Sabrina is only hissing because she feels insecure right now.  She'd be hissing at anyone who came close to her, so it's not personal at all.  At this point, allow her to set the schedule - if she's hissing more, back off a little bit.  Be sure to take a treat with you every time you go in to visit her.  She'll eventually figure out that when you appear she gets a tasty delicacy and isn't hurt or threatened in any way.  It does take time but will be all the more rewarding when she finally trusts you.  I totally understand you being impatient as patience is not my strong suit either, but it will pay off

 in the long run.  

 

[jillsmo]

Good idea, I haven't been taking treats in every time. Thank you so much for your time and advice, Juleska said you guys were awesome and she was right!

 

[jillsmo]

So we're on Day 6 and I'm getting discouraged. Shouldn't she have at least stopped swatting at me by now?

 

[sue f]

I am of the opinion that the only way to get a cat to warm up to you is to ignore him.

That said, I feel for you; I got my latest cat from a shelter in December, at just the same age as yours is now.  So not only did I take a frightened animal out of one universe and plop her into another, I had to give her antibiotics twice a day!

I was lucky, she chose me at the shelter, so the transition wasn't too bad--what I wasn't prepared for was the the Terrible Teens, that age yours and mine are going to be in for the next year or so.  Teenage cats can be unpredictable, and sometimes a bit surly, and here we are just wanting to feel the love!!

The treats are a good idea, and I hear the Feliway works for some cats (not mine).  As long as she is eating, drinking, using the litterbox, you have the battle half won.  Don't visit as much (if you can stand it!), and see if she settles a bit.  The thought occurs that she is hearing the other cat or the children and feels a little uneasy because she can't see the perceived "danger".

 

[mrpurrrfectcat]

I wouldn't approach her too much, wait for her to come to you. If she is swatting you, it may be because you are getting a little too close, a little too soon.
Don't take it personally, this is a whole new environment for her and as she was a stray she has a lot to adjust to.

Feliway defusers are really good and playing with her if she wants to. Just being in the room with her calmly doing something else, so that she just gets used to being around you. Reading to her is good because you are not looking at her as cats can find eye contact intimating and reading keeps a calming tone.

If she is eating, drinking and using her litter box then she should settle well if you give her time.

Of course, I don't think that the odd treat here and there will do any harm

 

[margd]

I'd give Sabrina another few days but I'm wondering if the fact she's on a shelf is some of the problem.  How large is your closet?  Is it large enough that you could block access to the shelf and put an upside down box on the floor with a door cut out of it for her to hide?  Maybe if she was on the ground, she'd be more inclined to come out and explore.  You could also sit beside her that way and she would have the option to approach bit by bit, urged on by the treats.  Some cats approach gradually, coming a bit closer every day or so.    

It also might be a good idea to reduce the frequency of your visits if they are stressing her out.   Maybe every hour is too often - try every three or four.   She needs a chance to let her natural curiosity take hold.  The fact that she's come out before is a good sign.

Six days is not very long so hang in there!    

 

[jillsmo]

Hello everybody! So, it's been about a month, I found out that Sabrina was feral when she got to the shelter, which I suppose explains why this has been so hard. We've gotten to the point where she spends all day hiding in the dresser but she comes out every night to play; only when I'm there, she doesn't come out when I'm not there. When I play with toys with her, she's always very responsive, unless I try to get her too close to me, and then she backs off. She spends the WHOLE night jumping around and destroying my room and all my belongings, especially the toilet paper. She really hates toilet paper! But she still spends all day hiding in the dresser, and she still hisses at me when I peek in at her. Eating, drinking & litterbox has always been fine and appropriate.

So, now I'm looking for tips on how to encourage her to come out of hiding during the day! And how to get her to feel more comfortable around me, even though I'm pretty sure I'm the only human she trusts at this point. Thanks again!! 

 

 

[juleska]

Yikes! Sorry none of us replied to you, Jillsmo. I guess it got lost in the shuffle. I know from our offline discussions that she is making steady (but slow) progress. I think you're very close to turning a corner with her. Don't get discouraged. You're doing all the right things!