Please help me :(

[thalia0717]

I Saved my cat when it was a baby and the mom abandoned him. he is now almost 5 years old. My fiance and him didnt get along and hes bit him several times. I always defended the cat cause he would punish the cat by lightly smacking him on the butt or yelling so I told him he deserved it. He always was good to me. The first 3 years I paid alot of attention to him but he was always in a bedroom because my brother inlaw was allergic. We would keep the window open and at times hed go out. The last 2 years I didnt spend much time with him and I recently moved to an apartment. My father in law didnt want him in their house so I took him with me.

He was scared the first two days but then was fine. I have had him at my place 2 weeks. I work long hours but when Im there I give him alot of attention when he wants it. A few days ago my fiance spent the night and he moved and the cat bit him. it broke skin but not enough to bleed but it hurt. It wasnt the first time hed bit him however.

I played with my cat last night before i went to sleep. In the moddle of the night while I was asleep he dug his teeth into my arm. He punctured the skin so bad that I couldnt get it to stop bleeding now I have an infection and had to get shots. I was going to take him to the animal foundation where its no kill because simply im afraid. I am very attached to him but not to where Im going to be scared everynight to go near him and I am.

My fiance wants to keep him but I am afraid that one day he will bite someone other than us or our child. I have never had him act this way towards me and I am heart broken.

Can I please get some opinions on what to do. I will not let him back to my apartment I am afraid. Whether his family lets the cat stay or not I dont know, but if they do I want to know that I made the right decision if I keep him. thanks kindly.

 

[yayi]

Originally Posted by THALIA0717

. I will not let him back to my apartment

Where is he now?
When was his last check up?
A sudden change of behavior could be a sign of illness.

 

[rad65]

It sounds like your cat was suffering from multiple things. First, he was edgy because of the move, as you said. He then saw your fiance, who he apparently doesn't like because he uses physical reprimands, so he bit him. He was probably still being aggressive from that incident when he bit you, especially if he's never shown aggression towards you. Misplaced aggression is very common in cats, as they spend most time inside and you are the only one to vent on.

Also, you've had him for 5 years, he should be considered family. Don't let one bite (I don't count any of your fiance's bites, if it's due to him reprimanding your cat incorrectly) affect how you see him.

 

[thalia0717]

He is at my fiances place for now. The first time he was a year or so old and we were sleeping and he bit my fiance. then a year or so later we moved him to the bedroom upstairs cause of his brother and my fiance was using the computer one day the cat jumped on the computer desk starred at him and then he attacked his wrist. Thats when he spanked his but with a stick ( i was misinformed i just got this story from my fiance-i thought he hit him first and that it was more than those two times) and the last time it was this past week at my apartment. I feel so sad. But i look at my arm and i feel pain and so i am torn

 

[rad65]

Is your cat declawed? It's odd that he's going for bites before swiping.

 

[hissy]

Tell your fiancee if he hits this cat one more time, you are going to hit HIM with a stick. if your cat feels threatened, he will attack. When someone hits, smacks, taps or hurts a cat, they never forget. They just never do and they can and do become aggressive. Honestly, if my husband ever hit any of my cats it would be the last time he would see me or the cats. Even a small tap is dangerous. you need to talk to your fiancee and set him straight about leaving this cat alone. If he doesn't then you are going to have more attacks because it is misdirected aggression. If they hit an animal, when are they going to strike a child, or you?

 

[thalia0717]

I was misinformed as I stated in previous post he smacked him once because he bit him for no reason but that was the only time and the cat has gone after him 2 other times -for a total of three. he is not declawed....i dont know what to do now. i am afraid to bring him back to my place.

So he has bit my fiance a total of 3 times. Twice while he was sleeping on leg and once while he was on computer and he didnt even touch him all he did was look at him. And then he has bit me once (but like i said I havent slept in same room with him in 2 years or so probably)

 

[rad65]

It could be that your cat is getting overexcited and forgetting what a play nip is. It sounds like most of the bites happen at night while you are asleep. Is it possible you're rolling on top of him or something, and he's biting reactionarily? You could close him out of thebedroom at night, since that seems to be his problem area/time. Honestly, your cat has only bitten someone four times according to you, in five years, you have nothing to be afraid of. That means 1822 out of the last 1826 days you've owned him, he hasn't bitten someone. That's a solid track record.

Though, if he had to sleep outside and hasn't been let in since you started this thread, he might be pissed at you for that, too.

To be honest, it sounds like you're overreacting a bit because the one time he bit you, it got infected. That is bad luck, and traumatizing if you hate shots, but it's not his fault that his teeth have bacteria on them. I don't know, I just feel I wouldn't consider giving my cats to shelter if they bit me on average once a year.

 

[thalia0717]

He has been in the room he was in before I took him to my apartment. I doubt i rolled on him my dog sleeps with me and I never have a problem. But she is smart enough to move if i hit her on mistake not attack me. I cant keep him in the bathroom or out of the bedroom where I sleep because he puts his claw under the door and tears up my carpet....If tearing up the carpet isnt enough the noise would make you pee yourself. I have tried blocking the gap from under door to floor but it doesnt help. Its not just the biting although that was the major issue. I cant keep him locked out of the bedroom cause he trys to rip through my carpet and if hes not biting me and sleeping with me he wont let me sleep. ALl he does is come up to me and head butt me or meow or purr and although thats cute when I work 14 hr days id like to sleep peacefully. If i had him back at my place id probably have a heart attack if he came anywhere near my face. Im not trying to make excuses but i am pretty upset over this and very tired from pain and no sleep

 

[seattleeco]

Well, most of the nocturnal behavior in your latest reply sounds like a typical young cat to me. If you do work 14 hour days, he's probably lonely and a bit attention-starved. I'd consider getting him a buddy, another cat. The scratching outside your door is pretty normal (our cat does it too if we don't let him sleep with us), and there are ways to deal with it that I think have been detailed elsewhere on this forum. Or, I can come back and post about it later.

All I can say is that it really doesn't sound like anything too out of the ordinary. He probably needs more playtime and attention than he's getting right now, so either you and your fiance need to provide that or you need to get him a companion who can help burn off steam. Sorry you're stressed, but take a deep breath and a step back: he's part of your family, so there are a lot of different things to try that will help restore the relationship you both want to have.

 

[thalia0717]

My hand is really swollen and bruised. Im confused. the place i went to the doctors they have cats and are lovers but told me to give him away that if hes been like this to the age of 5 there is no changing his behavior. Hes not a young cat. hes 5. I get everyone here saying keep him and all medical opinions to give him away if hes that aggressive and biting when no one is bothering him. I havent given him shots ( i never had an animal growing up i didnt know...and hes not fixed) if i did that now, do you think it would help at all? I dont want to be afraid.

 

[rad65]

Neutering calms down cats a lot, it is definitely worth doing. Also, if he ever got out, he could inpregnate some females and add to the overpopulation.

 

[cheylink]

Originally Posted by THALIA0717

My hand is really swollen and bruised. Im confused. the place i went to the doctors they have cats and are lovers but told me to give him away that if hes been like this to the age of 5 there is no changing his behavior. Hes not a young cat. hes 5. I get everyone here saying keep him and all medical opinions to give him away if hes that aggressive and biting when no one is bothering him. I havent given him shots ( i never had an animal growing up i didnt know...and hes not fixed) if i did that now, do you think it would help at all? I dont want to be afraid.

Please make an appointment to have him neutered and vaccinated ASAP. You obviously love him and want to do what is right for him....I am shocked that any veterinarian would suggest " give him away" before suggesting the most obvious probability.......

 

[threecatowner]

Originally Posted by cheylink

Please make an appointment to have him neutered and vaccinated ASAP. You obviously love him and want to do what is right for him....I am shocked that any veterinarian would suggest " give him away" before suggesting the most obvious probability.......

I don't think the vet suggested it, I think it was her doctor that said give him away.

Years ago we had a cat - Cujo, aptly named - that had lived on the street most of his life and would attack like a crazy cat. Chased my mom and bit the back of her leg pretty bad once.

We took him in, had him neutered, and he calmed down quite a bit. He ended up being one of the most lovable cats we ever had.

Neuter, neuter neuter, please! That will make a world of difference!

 

[thalia0717]

I really appreciate all the help. Can someone tell me why that helps so much (neutering)? and at the age of 5 will it help as much as if i did it when he was a baby/ also finances are tight i was saving his life wasnt looking for an animal but have done my best with him....where can i get info on vaccines and neutering at a lower cost? Vets in las vegas are so expensive.....and yes it was the 2 different doctors and coworkers even those with cats who said thats not normal....you should find him another home.

 

[hissy]

I'm surprised he isn't spraying your home like a fire man putting out a fire. Neutering calms them down but it doesn't happen overnight. It takes a few months after a neuter for a male to calm down. But it would stop him from biting you. Also it isn't his fault that you got so infected. You have cat scratch fever (as do I) I almost lost my hand a few years ago because I too am susceptible to cat scratch fever. be sure your tetanus is up to date.

 

[thalia0717]

another stupid ? im sure but what is cat scratch fever??? my supervisor said it today too....also will it takes months for him to stop biting or will that happen right away?

 

[yayi]

Originally Posted by THALIA0717

I havent given him shots ( i never had an animal growing up i didnt know...and hes not fixed)

So, for clarification, your cat was never brought to a vet? Perhaps it is time that you invest some money on a visit. The veterinarian will not only provide the overdue health check up of your cat, suggest you have him neutered and give you more info about feline care.

 

[farleyv]

OMG, he is not neutered? We have the responsibility when we take on a cat to take care of it.

Start with the neutering. You may find this will help considerably.

I can't imagine hitting my cat with a stick.

 

[miao_kitty]

Some notes:

- Your cat might have bitten your fiance in the first place because he was new and maybe taking your attention away from the cat. Your fiance SHOULD discourage biting but not to the point of hurting the cat. A loud noise also helps.

- If he's biting you at night, he might also be playing. As others have said, since cats are nocturnal, the middle of the night is their prime time to hunt. My cat does it sometimes where he's running around like he's chasing invisible mice. If you or your fiance moved in the bed at night, he might think you're the prey and try to bite you. Shermie does that with your toes, like he's hunting. If he bit you hard enough to draw blood, that definitely is bad luck but since it was only one time you shouldn't freak out yet. However, if you do get your skin punctured by a cat YOU DEFINITELY SHOULD GO TO THE DOCTOR'S RIGHT AWAY because cats' mouths are full of bacteria and if left untreated or poorly treated with antibiotics you can get an infection.

- A squirt bottle might work as a bite deterrent as long as you don't get water directly in his ears or eyes. It may also help as a deterrent to keep your cat off the bed.

- It is possible to keep your cats out of your bedroom. Like one other person said, there are tips floating around in these forums. Also, you might have to endure a few nights w/ earplugs and a noise machine but the cat will get used to it if you stay consistent. Also it'll help him if you leave toys, scratching post and bed in another room so he'll have something to occupy him.

- If he acts like he has excessive energy I would definitely get a laser pointer or wand or ball or some kind of toy where you can wave it around and let him go nuts for a while. it worked like a charm w/ my kitten. he'd sleep a good amount at night.

- and yes, DEFINITELY TAKE HIM TO A VET! You can ask your local shelter if they do veterinary care or if they can recommend a cheap play for a neuter. It will help A LOT...and it will take some time of doing some of the things listed above but like others have said, he should calm down.

- Please, please, please, please, please don't give him to a shelter and tell them it's b/c he's aggressive. That will make him a more likely candidate to be put to sleep and it will SEVERELY limit his chances of being adopted. He doesn't sound like an aggressive cat (i.e. he's not attacking your feet all the time or growling/hissing/biting constantly). And also, he is your family and adopting an animal means taking on the responsibilities of care and working with the difficult times. At least try these things before you make the decision that you can't handle him.


I would say definitely try things that other people have recommended. And IMHO your cat is not aggressive but just misunderstood. Best of luck!