Penny Follows Me Everywhere !

[bobbie sue]

I have a shadow and her name is "Penny" <smiling>.  She follows me everywhere and she doesn't want to keep me out of sight.  Last night I left her sleeping on the ottoman and went into the kitchen.  For a moment I had to step back and uh ohhhh.... I heard a distress sound and sure enough... it was Penny, since I had stepped on her paw not realizing she was right behind me.  While it can be cute at times, at others it is downright annoying.  When one wants peace and quiet in the bathroom I have to usually (not always) beat her into it and close the door before she appears at the entrance way.  I wonder why this is;  whether it is because she is part-feral and misses her "homies" and becomes lonely very quickly or is this indicative of her needing a playmate - another one of her species to interact with on a level which I simply cannot??

We have been pondering whether to adopt a young kitten from a shelter.  I fully realize that the two might not get along at first or even never for that matter but I do want to try.  Since Penny is high-strung and can get nippy but not in a vicious way, I do think she will eventually come to welcome a new addition since she is basically very sociable.  Years ago we adopted two kittens at the same time and we were fortunate in that they bonded quickly and became life-long close friends;  they slept with and played with each other, chased after and did everything together.  It was heart-warming to observe them.  On the other hand, my mother had two kittens and they did not get along;  they were always separated by two rooms strictly by choice.  If a person is lucky enough to have two cats that truly get along and are fond and affectionate toward each other, they are fortunate.  

I do think if she had a companion of her own species that would tend to make her less needy and always wanting to be with me since it does have its drawbacks, particularly when I am cooking, eating meals and doing my craft work.  Does anyone else experience their cats always wanting to be by their side and how do you feel and deal with this situation?

Thanks in advance for any replies.  Wishing all a good day.

 

[amethyst]

I actually have a few cats that are like that, not to that extreme, but that could be because I have 10 cats total. I have to leave the bathroom door open or I end up with a cat crying outside to door, sounding like it's dying.  Not all my cats get along, but they do each have their own friends among them. I think a playmate of similar energy level would help curb the neediness since she will have someone else to bug, especially if she use to live with other cats. Right now you are her only friend to play with, so anytime she wants to play or be loved you are her only choice. Picking out a new kitten at the shelter were you can see what each one is like, you can hopefully pick a similar one or one that complements your current one sounds like a good idea.

Basically when I first moved here I only adopted one kitten, within a month I adopted a second since the first one was so hyper.

 

[verna davies]

I have three young cats, 24 months,female 20 months female and 9 months male. The first and second didn't get on as well as I expected, no fighting but never in the same room. The second was like yours, always one step behind me. If I went upstairs, she'd follow me, when I went down, again she'd follow and always sit in front of me and meow. Hence I got number three. Luckily all has worked out well. They now all spend time together and play well. But...the second cat still follows me and the third follows her but not to the same extent as before. I feel like the pied piper on times but love it.
Perhaps your cat would benefit from a playmate but there are no guarantees. If you do have another, choose carefully. I would have a male and with the same temperament as Penny. I think it is lovely that she wants to be with you but can understand how you feel.

Let us know what you decide.

 

[bobbie sue]

 
I actually have a few cats that are like that, not to that extreme, but that could be because I have 10 cats total. I have to leave the bathroom door open or I end up with a cat crying outside to door, sounding like it's dying.  Not all my cats get along, but they do each have their own friends among them. I think a playmate of similar energy level would help curb the neediness since she will have someone else to bug, especially if she use to live with other cats. Right now you are her only friend to play with, so anytime she wants to play or be loved you are her only choice. Picking out a new kitten at the shelter were you can see what each one is like, you can hopefully pick a similar one or one that complements your current one sounds like a good idea.

Basically when I first moved here I only adopted one kitten, within a month I adopted a second since the first one was so hyper.

Oh my!  10 cats!  How do you manage?  If I had even 2 or 3 exactly like Penny, I think I'd have to turn to drink! haha

If you don't mind my asking, do you have your own large home or some acreage on which they can roam safely at times?  

We live in a large apartment but still, I think Penny misses her roaming days as a semi-feral.  We surmise she must have been fed when she appeared at some home routinely but perhaps when they moved, the new owner didn't welcome her return and so put her in a car nearly 3 months ago and dropped her off in a different area where she eagerly approached my son when he beckoned her and the rest is history.  

I do agree with you that she needs another cat playmate to interact with but I just don't know how I would go about choosing the right one.  The shelter where I go have these large wire cages and when you see one you think is nice or cute or for whatever reason, you can take one out and hold her.  In those few minutes how is one supposed to correctly gauge which one would be a perfect match???   I would feel badly if I happen to choose a kitten which Penny would dislike even after getting accustomed to her.  I just assumed a female would be less territorial even though I'm sure they are all "fixed".  

I guess, after all is said, it really is just a matter of the luck of the draw.  Hopefully, they will get along as my other two females did so many years ago.  It brings a smile to my face just thinking of those happy times.

Thanks for your input.

 

[bobbie sue]

I have three young cats, 24 months,female 20 months female and 9 months male. The first and second didn't get on as well as I expected, no fighting but never in the same room. The second was like yours, always one step behind me. If I went upstairs, she'd follow me, when I went down, again she'd follow and always sit in front of me and meow. Hence I got number three. Luckily all has worked out well. They now all spend time together and play well. But...the second cat still follows me and the third follows her but not to the same extent as before. I feel like the pied piper on times but love it.
Perhaps your cat would benefit from a playmate but there are no guarantees. If you do have another, choose carefully. I would have a male and with the same temperament as Penny. I think it is lovely that she wants to be with you but can understand how you feel.

Let us know what you decide.

 

Thank you for your comments.  Yep, you were finally lucky that they all spend time together and play.  I suppose some cats are needier and more clingy than others and even when they find a new playmate some of that same behavior remains.  I look at it as a great compliment and I also feel as you do being a Pied Piper.

I am actually surprised that she has made such a positive transition from an out-door semi feral to living in an indoor situation with people.  However, she still is kind of temperamental and doesn't lap sit or appreciate too much petting. She missed that important time frame of socialization with humans as our previous cats had so this behavior is understandable.  

The sad thing about it is that at times I have this desire to just scoop her up and lavish hugs upon  her but she won't tolerate that I know.  Last night we attempted to place her on my husband's lap to see what happened;  she kind of freaked out and couldn't wait to get off.  She is always near us though.... she likes the contact and hates to be alone and neglected in any way.  Had she been raised differently with us humans, she would welcome close contact and enjoyed it.

Oh well... we each are how we are and it's all a matter of acceptance and love.

 

[amethyst]

 

Oh my!  10 cats!  How do you manage?  If I had even 2 or 3 exactly like Penny, I think I'd have to turn to drink! haha

If you don't mind my asking, do you have your own large home or some acreage on which they can roam safely at times?  

We live in a large apartment but still, I think Penny misses her roaming days as a semi-feral.  We surmise she must have been fed when she appeared at some home routinely but perhaps when they moved, the new owner didn't welcome her return and so put her in a car nearly 3 months ago and dropped her off in a different area where she eagerly approached my son when he beckoned her and the rest is history.  

I do agree with you that she needs another cat playmate to interact with but I just don't know how I would go about choosing the right one.  The shelter where I go have these large wire cages and when you see one you think is nice or cute or for whatever reason, you can take one out and hold her.  In those few minutes how is one supposed to correctly gauge which one would be a perfect match???   I would feel badly if I happen to choose a kitten which Penny would dislike even after getting accustomed to her.  I just assumed a female would be less territorial even though I'm sure they are all "fixed".  

I guess, after all is said, it really is just a matter of the luck of the draw.  Hopefully, they will get along as my other two females did so many years ago.  It brings a smile to my face just thinking of those happy times.

Thanks for your input.

Yes I live on an acreage in a house, in the middle of nowhere down gravel roads. My closest neighbor is over half a mile away, so not much traffic, only a few cars a day. Plus I'm surrounded by grain and hay fields so literally hundreds of acres to roam and hunt, though they normally stay on my property. Most of my cats are indoor/outdoor cats, only 3 are strictly indoor only. It's not too bad really, I am home all the time so caring for my pets (I also have 3 large dogs and 2 chinchillas) is pretty much my job, and they keep me company while my husband is at work. The only time it's really a problem is in the mid winter, where I live 40 below is not uncommon, so all the cats have to stay inside. To be clear though I didn't intentionally get 10 cats, all but 2 are one way or another the result of cats getting dumped on my property. Animal shelters up here are already over flowing with cats, so if I didn't keep them they would have likely been euthanized (especially my feral, Tux).

The best way to pick a kitten in the shelter is look them over, and pick one that seems outgoing and playful. I know the ones sitting back, being polite, or sleeping are cute too, but you need one that is going to help tire Penny out and keep her busy. If they have toys there for you to play with the kittens with try to entice them to play, if not, see if it would be alright to bring a toy (wand toys work best) to "test out" the kitten you are interested in.  A male may actually be a better idea then a female, though either one would work being a kitten. Also it's Penny that is going to be the territorial one if anyone is going to be, the kitten will be moving in on her territory.  Also I find my females to be more territorial in general then my 3 males (who are all fixed), the females are the bosses, lol.

 

[bobbie sue]

Thanks Amethyst, I enjoyed reading the account of your animals and I will consider what you said about making a choice of a kitten when the day comes.  My vet has told me that Penny is tough and he recommended I keep the Feliway diffuser on for 3 weeks prior to our bringing a kitten home so she will be chill enough to accept a newcomer.

 

I need to have my outlets adjusted by the superintendent since they are horizontal and not vertical so placing the Feliway diffuser on correctly is impossible.  After that we will be ready to begin our search at a popular shelter where we adopted our other two back in 1987.  

Here's hoping that we choose the right kitten and that the two get along well together.

P.S.  You are fortunate to live in a rural area.  That's always been my dream actually... born and bred a "city gal" but always questing for the country life instead.  New York City is too frenetic for me!

 

[verna davies]

Don't be disheartened that Penny won't sit on your lap. Kiwi, my middle cat (the follower) hates being picked up and wouldn't entertain the thought of sitting on my lap but since having Buzz, the third cat, she now sits on my lap most nights. It has to be her choice though. If I put her on my lap she jumps straight down.
You are right, it is the luck of the draw when choosing a new cat or kitten. The shelters here in the UK often have some history on the cats for rehoming, just take your time and dont let the staff at the shelter rush you into choosing. Good luck with your decision and I look forward to hearing what happens.

 

[bobbie sue]

Don't be disheartened that Penny won't sit on your lap. Kiwi, my middle cat (the follower) hates being picked up and wouldn't entertain the thought of sitting on my lap but since having Buzz, the third cat, she now sits on my lap most nights. It has to be her choice though. If I put her on my lap she jumps straight down.
You are right, it is the luck of the draw when choosing a new cat or kitten. The shelters here in the UK often have some history on the cats for rehoming, just take your time and dont let the staff at the shelter rush you into choosing. Good luck with your decision and I look forward to hearing what happens.

I am just curious, did you get Kiwi when she was a really young kitten since she doesn't care to be picked up or to sit on your lap?  I just assumed that young kittens raised from 8 - 10 weeks old would be socialized early and be very loving and come to be accustomed to sitting on one's lap if they were handled consistently.

Our previous other cats, adopted from about that age were very loving, enjoyed being held, petted and sat on our laps without hesitation.  I thought it was a matter of nurture prevailing over nature but perhaps it is not.  Since each cat is as unique as we, that must account for the varying preferences.  

I'll keep updating the situation.  

Have a good day!

 

 

[verna davies]

I had her at 10 weeks old. She was one of a litter of 3 and had been given to the cat shelter as an unwanted litter 2 weeks earlier. I get the feeling that the family at the home she was born down did not handle her a lot. Pickle doesn't like to sit on my lap often either. Again she was surrended at 8 weeks old with her mother and I had her a week later. Buzz was born in the cat shelter and was socialised well from birth and is a loving lap cat so it seems that the more they are handled from birth, the more loving they are but I assume there are some exceptions. I can only talk from my experiences but having Buzz has changed both the other two for the better.

 

[orange&white]

I've owned two or three cats at a time since the late 1980's.  Prior to that, I only had one cat at a time.  My observation is that cats do get some comfort from having another member of the same species around, even the cats who choose to sit off in a separate room most of the time.

I think one reason that we humans were given two hands is so that we could pet more than one cat at the same time.