I have a kitten who I took in when he was about a couple weeks old (he was found in a box on the side of the road, seperated from his mother). Now, he is about 2 months old, a lovely boy! But I have an issue with him being overly attached to me. He will constantly meow and cry even if I'm in the room because he wants to be right on top of my shoulders/chest. I'm okay with clingy, and I love him to death, but when he's so clingy to the point that he MUST be on me at all times and will constantly cry when he isn't, it gets overwhelming and annoying. I was wondering if I could have any suggestions for this type of behavior?
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Overly Attached Kitten
- Thread starter seokseok
- Start Date
Hi!
Can you obtain a heartbeat toy for him to snuggle with? He also needs playtime and maybe even another kitten buddy, but if you hang in there your sweetie should grow out of this
Can you obtain a heartbeat toy for him to snuggle with? He also needs playtime and maybe even another kitten buddy, but if you hang in there your sweetie should grow out of this
Your poor boy is lonely! Normally he would have mom(plus maybe some aunts or a grandma around... and their kittens) plus his siblings to play with/learn from. Right now you have to be both mom and siblings.
If it is at all possible I would adopt another kitten. If you can’t do that I would look for other Singleton kittens or a litter around his age that you can foster for a month or two. Yes a brother or sister would be best but sometimes you can’t get that second cat.
If it is at all possible I would adopt another kitten. If you can’t do that I would look for other Singleton kittens or a litter around his age that you can foster for a month or two. Yes a brother or sister would be best but sometimes you can’t get that second cat.
They grow out of it to a large degree. To help your sanity in the meantime, establish rules and don't break them. For instance, "when I am on the computer you can be in this lovely basket right near me, but not on my lap or the keyboard." Another one I use would be "while I am in this chair, you can be in the cup of this scratching post right next to me or behind my head, but not on my lap . . . whereas the other chair without the scratching post side table is where you come on my lap." If you are not entirely consistent, and sometimes give in to the meowing, it will be a long road while you wait for the kitten to mellow.
Unfortunately, its often still hard even with rules. For example, my younger cat is still very affectionate but still tries to come on my lap when I'm in boxers just after waking up. And that I don't allow.
Unfortunately, its often still hard even with rules. For example, my younger cat is still very affectionate but still tries to come on my lap when I'm in boxers just after waking up. And that I don't allow.
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I think one of the good things you can do to create a confident, non-clingy kitten out of a kitten that lost his cat mom and siblings too early is to set up a lot of established patterns each day that the kitten can come to recognize and trust. Some people think that this would only mean patterns associated with when you serve them food or when you clean their litter box or when you are regularly in the house versus out of the house, but I definitely also think it also means setting up patterns for loving times and cuddle times that the kitten can trust will happen each day. Usually a clingy kitten just doesn't know when, for example, food will reliably be provided, or when cuddle times will most likely happen, et cetera -- they are either just too young to watch or know your patterns well, or they just don't know how to read your signals yet. Don't ignore the idea of setting aside regular and specific cuddle time for kittens, that's my point. (Not saying you are! just suggesting doing well-rounded patterns they can look forward to.)
Cats learn a lot from watching your body language and habits, along with listening to your voice. Often when a kitten is extra clingy or "meow-y", occam's razor points to it just being a matter of them being famished again (kittens need to eat a LOT as they grow!). But it can also mean that they are not confident of what is to happen next with you (cuddles? food? are you leaving soon? is it time for your shower? is this when you are usually happy? is this the time you usually watch tv or are on your phone?) and so they are afraid to totally let go and walk away, so to speak. If they feel more confident that there are patterns of a "time for everything" and that they know those regular times and habits of yours, I've found that they are more relaxed and confident. They don't have to be "worried" over everything and extra clingy should they only see you at certain times of day. They know what certain times of day offer up for them, with you, and can come to rely upon that. And they become more confident. Does that make sense?
I have a cat who was orphaned along with her siblings at 4 days old, and solely fostered by humans until we adopted her -- so she really pays attention to all of my human body language, habits, and patterns. Sometimes she was clingy growing up -- but if they gain confidence and stability, they grow out of it and calm down. You don't necessarily have to get other kittens to help occupy a single cat, although most people do, it seems. It just depends on the reasons behind your choice of having one cat versus many cats.
I have raised 2 orphan litters and they both were super close to each other until around 4 months old when they started being more independent. That said since I assume you have to work I would defiantly get an extra kitten. They comfort each other and make each other feel more secure. Even the kitten lady advices to avoid raising singletons if at all possible (she has many videos on YouTube under the kitten lady.)
The 3 kittens I just raised still rely on each other at 9 months old as buddies/friends/sparring partner. My teen kitty visits his brother so he can wrestle with him ...... and annoy his sister a bit. The boys were best friends from day 1 !!! When they are in my mom’s backyard during the day I only need to know where one is to know where the other one is. Yes a schedule helps. Time helps. Still at the end of the day you are not a cat and don’t speak cat. It is why I always have 2 cats if I can (my apartment limits me to one.) Plus kittens learn boundaries from each other, especially at that young.
The 3 kittens I just raised still rely on each other at 9 months old as buddies/friends/sparring partner. My teen kitty visits his brother so he can wrestle with him ...... and annoy his sister a bit. The boys were best friends from day 1 !!! When they are in my mom’s backyard during the day I only need to know where one is to know where the other one is. Yes a schedule helps. Time helps. Still at the end of the day you are not a cat and don’t speak cat. It is why I always have 2 cats if I can (my apartment limits me to one.) Plus kittens learn boundaries from each other, especially at that young.
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danteshuman
- there may be many reasons a person or a family would choose having only a single cat. We all cannot be a home-to-many, despite our wanting to do so. Fun & Supportive Thread For Single-cat Households Only
I think this is wonderful, if possible, but often unrealistic and unnecessary. I think you should try to set up a routine but not stress yourself out if you need to make changes. Kittens are adaptable. And they’ll adapt to differences in your schedule between weekends and weekdays, vacations, day trips, change in shower times, going out in the evening etc. I work in medicine and have a 5 month old kitten who is ok (or seems to do ok) with my sometimes irregular schedule (ie, sometimes working nights, sometimes working 24+ hour shifts). My coworker also had a kitten at this age while working irregular hours, and she’s a totally awesome well-adjusted cat.I think one of the good things you can do to create a confident, non-clingy kitten out of a kitten that lost his cat mom and siblings too early is to set up a lot of established patterns each day that the kitten can come to recognize and trust. Some people think that this would only mean patterns associated with when you serve them food or when you clean their litter box or when you are regularly in the house versus out of the house, but I definitely also think it also means setting up patterns for loving times and cuddle times that the kitten can trust will happen each day. Usually a clingy kitten just doesn't know when, for example, food will reliably be provided, or when cuddle times will most likely happen, et cetera -- they are either just too young to watch or know your patterns well, or they just don't know how to read your signals yet. Don't ignore the idea of setting aside regular and specific cuddle time for kittens, that's my point. (Not saying you are! just suggesting doing well-rounded patterns they can look forward to.)
Cats learn a lot from watching your body language and habits, along with listening to your voice. Often when a kitten is extra clingy or "meow-y", occam's razor points to it just being a matter of them being famished again (kittens need to eat a LOT as they grow!). But it can also mean that they are not confident of what is to happen next with you (cuddles? food? are you leaving soon? is it time for your shower? is this when you are usually happy? is this the time you usually watch tv or are on your phone?) and so they are afraid to totally let go and walk away, so to speak. If they feel more confident that there are patterns of a "time for everything" and that they know those regular times and habits of yours, I've found that they are more relaxed and confident. They don't have to be "worried" over everything and extra clingy should they only see you at certain times of day. They know what certain times of day offer up for them, with you, and can come to rely upon that. And they become more confident. Does that make sense?
So do your best at a schedule but don’t stress out!
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A
altairose
, my main points were to make your patterns frequent and regular enough to be recognizable by the kitten, but also to make purposeful cuddling time a daily thing. Some clingy kittens need that regular cuddle time so that they don't feel upset in general. If a cat is hungry, it usually gets fed; if a cat wants to play, time is usually spent playing with the cat. So if a cat wants some cuddle time, I think it's also good to make dedicated time for that as well -- and then they'll ease up on the human just like they do after they have been fed and after they have had playtime.
Pushpurrcatpaws raised a good point, --how much, and how frequently, are you feeding your little one?
Eight weeks old is still a very young kitten and it sees you as it’s mom. So, I wouldn’t withdraw any cuddle time right now. In another month he will become more confident and outgoing and then you can start gradually pulling away and establish boundaries that you are more comfortable with. Probably by four or five months old he is going to be more interested in running around and playing than hanging out with you.
In a month you will be missing the cuddles!!! My kitties quickly learned that if I put a blanket on my lap, it is snuggle time!
Please note I suggested fostering a second kitten (or a litter of kittens) for a while if the OP could not adopt a second kitten. I understand that a second cat isn’t already possible. I have an only kitty that is super attached to me ..... until we visit my mom and he gets to play with his brother!
Please note I suggested fostering a second kitten (or a litter of kittens) for a while if the OP could not adopt a second kitten. I understand that a second cat isn’t already possible. I have an only kitty that is super attached to me ..... until we visit my mom and he gets to play with his brother!
