Older and younger cat

[AndyBr]

New member, first post. This is a great resource for people!

Situation: I used to have two cats. One recently passed so I took this time shelter-in-place time to get a kitten.

The younger cat has been separated for about a month now in the bedroom (best sealable room in the house) and only for the last few days has had periodic visits with his big sister. With her former companion the older cat was bossy but with this pair it turns out the younger cat is more of a terror. The older one just wants to be left alone while the younger one sees a mobile playmate and giant cat toy. Squabbles are actually pretty minimal, but I worry about the older cat having fewer and fewer places she can call her own and not be vulnerable to an errant pounce and play. Right now there are precious few places she can call her own, and as the kitten grows older there will be even fewer.

Questions:

- Has anyone else had success with giving an older cat space of her own? What strategies have you used?

- I bought a cat door that can be programmed by microchip, with the intention of programming for one cat only. I originally thought it would b for the younger cat to protect her food. Now I'm thinking of using it for the older one (with the idea of switching the bedroom to be hers, and she could go in and out through the door but the younger cat couldn't). Thoughts? Especially on training the older cat to use this door (more broadly: training a specific behavior for an older cat)?

Thanks in advance for any insights you can give.

Andy

 

[AndyBr]

BTW the cat door is this: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00GAZZIMY/

It works pretty well. I haven't mounted it anywhere yet except a box to train the younger one. You have to turn it off at first, as there is a noticeable clicking sound when it recognizes her microchip. And I held the door open a little for him the first few times to show him that entrance was possible.

 

[Jemima Lucca]

I think your idea is brilliant really! I had that situation also, I wish I would have done that for the older cat. He was 16 when I got my kitten. He could have used the space. Your idea is spot on! Does the older cat show any interest?

 

[ArtNJ]

Wanting to help a stressed older cat is commendable, but unfortunately I think this approach will actually be harmful. They need time together to get used to each other. If the older cat is allowed to chose avoidance, it will do so, and they won't get time together, and things won't improve. There is a narrow window of time where the young one is perceived as a kitten, and while it may not seem like this is helping, it could well be a lot worse if a one year old was behaving the same way towards your older cat. Among other things, older cats don't attack kittens. So we don't want to waste kittenhood by allowing the older cat to hide. Another problem with allowing the older cat to hide away is what I call the Christmas Morning effect -- the longer the kitten is denied access, the more excited and rambunctious she is on seeing the older cat, and the older cat never sees chill kitten. Older cat needs to see chill kitten. Accordingly, I recommend that people use moderation in giving their older cat breaks and closed door love. You can definitely still give breaks and closed door love -- but YOU have to control it, and use moderation -- I just don't think it will work well if you let the older cat chose.

As evidence, I cite the many posts we have from people that have indoor/outdoor cats, where the indoor/outdoor cat starts staying outside all the time to try and avoid the kitten. What to do they ask. Things don't seem to be getting better they tell us. We usually recommend keeping the older cat in for a while, so they have that time together. Recently, we had someone thank us for this recommendation as it worked quickly. Of course, sometimes things don't resolve quickly, and can indeed take a long time, with the cats never reaching friendship. On rare occasions, the older cat can be stressed enough to interfere with eating and litter box use. On rare occasions, separate lives may deserve consideration. However, I wouldn't go into it with that assumption. Give them time together.

 

[AndyBr]

Thanks, that's good advice. Right now I have the luxury (?) of working from home so I can flexible. Each has made a try at the other's food, and that seems to be a bone of contention.

 

[ArtNJ]

Thanks, that's good advice. Right now I have the luxury (?) of working from home so I can flexible. Each has made a try at the other's food, and that seems to be a bone of contention.

Not sure how young the kitten is, but the necessity of kitten food is overrated. Kittens do have small stomachs, so they need to be able to graze or have more meals when they are small. So what I did was I gave the kitten a couple of extra closed door feedings with kitten food, and the rest of the meals they shared the same food. It was just a lot easier than trying to enforce separate bowls. People do say that eventually they get trained on which bowls is whose, but it always seemed like a really hard thing to me.