- Joined
- Jan 2, 2018
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Hello, Im new here and could really use some advice. It's been several years since we had a cat prior to this. We adopted two kittens, a littermate male and female pair, November 1st. They are now 6 months old. They’re both very sweet with us but the boy is causing so many problems we’re contemplating returning him to the shelter, which we feel bad about. I’ve had cats in the past but never more than one at a time. I specifically wanted littermates because I read that they would have an aamzing bond but that hasnt been the case.
The girl is truly a sweetheart and has never caused one problem, ever. She’s also the smaller of the two, by far. The boy bullies her to the point that we cant show her affection if he is around. He’s very jealous and constantly butts her out of the way. So we started separating them and giving her affection in a different room for an hour or so a day.
But it’s with food too. They have separate food bowls placed across the room from each other but if the boy sees her eating he charges her and pushes her out of the way, same with drinking water. I dont know what to do about that other than separate them. But then whats the point of having two cats? He also pounces on her when she’s trying to sleep and she never wants to play with him. She ends up hissing and swiping at him before retreating under the bed. So basically, she lives under the bed and he guards all resources from her.
So, that’s the first of our two big issues. The second is that the boy has litterbox/poop problems. He also doesnt clean himself. He poops in the litterbox, then immediately will go and jump on our bed and sit on it, leaving a brown stain and a ridiculous amount of litter. Its almost like he prefers to do this to rid himself of litter and wipe his bottom instead of licking his bum like most cats do.
I change the sheets and wash the duvet every day. Yesterday morning I found poop and litter on my pillow. This cant go on. I have a toddler and he touches everything. Im paranoid about poop spots on the floor (we have dark wood floors) or in various places I can’t readily see them. If I shut him out of the bedroom then he sits on the carpet or couch. He doesnt scoot, and they just got all their vaccines and everything so I wouldnt think its worms. We have to try to catch him after he uses the litter box and wipe his bottom. But he usually goes at night after we’re in bed or during the day when we arent home, then jumps up on the bed. He’s also recently started treading his back paw in it so there are now poopy paw prints all over floors and bed. I cannot live like this. My whole house feels disgusting to me.
I’ve scheduled a vet visit for later in the week, but honestly I feel exasperated that one cat is causing this many problems. I’ve always had clean cats so this is strange to me. The bullying behavior is my main concern because I feel like my female kitten is miserable around him. Shes so much happier and more playful when they are in separate rooms. Its affecting our bonding with both of them. Her because we have such limited access to her, and him because we are frustrated with his behavior. We do give them both equal affection though as best we can.
Any advice or suggestions? Are we horrible for thinking about returning him to the shelter? I am taking him to the vet first obviously, but Im worried this is behavioral. I thought kittens at this age would be able to properly clean themselves.
*Also, they are on TOTW dry food and Blue Buffalo Wilderness canned. They get an 1/8th of the (big) canned each twice a day.
The girl is truly a sweetheart and has never caused one problem, ever. She’s also the smaller of the two, by far. The boy bullies her to the point that we cant show her affection if he is around. He’s very jealous and constantly butts her out of the way. So we started separating them and giving her affection in a different room for an hour or so a day.
But it’s with food too. They have separate food bowls placed across the room from each other but if the boy sees her eating he charges her and pushes her out of the way, same with drinking water. I dont know what to do about that other than separate them. But then whats the point of having two cats? He also pounces on her when she’s trying to sleep and she never wants to play with him. She ends up hissing and swiping at him before retreating under the bed. So basically, she lives under the bed and he guards all resources from her.
So, that’s the first of our two big issues. The second is that the boy has litterbox/poop problems. He also doesnt clean himself. He poops in the litterbox, then immediately will go and jump on our bed and sit on it, leaving a brown stain and a ridiculous amount of litter. Its almost like he prefers to do this to rid himself of litter and wipe his bottom instead of licking his bum like most cats do.
I change the sheets and wash the duvet every day. Yesterday morning I found poop and litter on my pillow. This cant go on. I have a toddler and he touches everything. Im paranoid about poop spots on the floor (we have dark wood floors) or in various places I can’t readily see them. If I shut him out of the bedroom then he sits on the carpet or couch. He doesnt scoot, and they just got all their vaccines and everything so I wouldnt think its worms. We have to try to catch him after he uses the litter box and wipe his bottom. But he usually goes at night after we’re in bed or during the day when we arent home, then jumps up on the bed. He’s also recently started treading his back paw in it so there are now poopy paw prints all over floors and bed. I cannot live like this. My whole house feels disgusting to me.
I’ve scheduled a vet visit for later in the week, but honestly I feel exasperated that one cat is causing this many problems. I’ve always had clean cats so this is strange to me. The bullying behavior is my main concern because I feel like my female kitten is miserable around him. Shes so much happier and more playful when they are in separate rooms. Its affecting our bonding with both of them. Her because we have such limited access to her, and him because we are frustrated with his behavior. We do give them both equal affection though as best we can.
Any advice or suggestions? Are we horrible for thinking about returning him to the shelter? I am taking him to the vet first obviously, but Im worried this is behavioral. I thought kittens at this age would be able to properly clean themselves.
*Also, they are on TOTW dry food and Blue Buffalo Wilderness canned. They get an 1/8th of the (big) canned each twice a day.