New Kitten Troubles

[DKM3921]

Hi everyone! New here. I adopted a kitten from a rescue back in October. The sweetest thing you ever did meet. He was found abandoned very young with his litter mates and was bottle fed. As a result, he's very trusting of people. He's high energy and loves everyone and everything, especially other cats. We had a neighbor that had a kitten about the same age and they had "play dates" 3 times a week and would spend hours running around chasing each other and then fall asleep curled up together. Unfortunately they moved, and my now 11 month old Salem is super lonely and bored.

We decided to get a 7 month old from the same rescue. She was found with her litter mates at 5 months old, and was the last of them to be adopted. The rescue told us she's "amazing with other animals, especially cats, but kind of timid around people". I've found the opposite to be true. She doesn't like to be picked up, but she's warmed up to me and will come over for pets and cuddles. It's been about a week of keeping her in a separate room (they both started pawing at the door), then a screen in between them (again they did well with this), and today was the first day I let them roam freely together (under my supervision). They are fine when not interacting directly with each other, but Salem is curious and excited about the newest resident. However, as soon as he approaches her it all falls apart. She keeps hissing and growling whenever he gets within 5 feet of her. He lays on his back, belly up, doing his little meows, showing absolutely no aggression, but she continues to hiss, growl, and I just had to pull him out and put him in my bedroom because she chased him into a corner and was trying to claw him. He put up no resistance and just looked incredibly confused. I don't know exactly what to do. I'm really surprised at her hostility being the new cat and being young. Should I keep them separate for a few days and reintroduce more slowly? (side note: both are fixed and about the same size; Salem is small for his age. I also live in a one bedroom apartment so the separation is difficult)

 

[moorspede]

Yes, separation is difficult in a one bedroom apartment, congratulations for doing so well, my black cat got out after three days.

Don't be discouraged, things are going quite well. Cats are territorial, she's not confident and fearful about being in Salem's territory. He sounds like a sweetie which will make getting to know each other easier.

I put feliway on 24/7 for the first couple of weeks, it helped calm them, you could try that or another calming product.

The major thing is to get your new cat to own the space, she needs some time alone in your living area while Salem is in another room for a few hours at least, perhaps after Salem has had a play and a meal and is about to go to sleep? Otherwise, she will be too wary to explore and rub against the furniture, and basically make it her territory as well. This would be time to bond with her, grab a fishing pole toy or something similar and play with her.

If you don't have cat trees or shelves for the cats to perch off the floor getting one or more would be good. A place in front of a window would be ideal. Bringing a cat off the floor builds confidence, she can watch what is going on and feel secure. I bought a cat tunnel and put it in the near the doorway. It makes cats feel safe to have walls around them and cat tunnels are great to play in.

I think you mentioned that she was not hissing at the door, does she hiss through a slightly open door? If so, Jackson Galaxy has a method where he feeds each cat on each side of the (cracked) door, he starts with the bowls quite far away and gradually moves them toward each other. It allows them to associate the other cat with good things (food). His vid is on youtube, it's called "The best way to introduce your two cats."

If you find they are both scrabbling at the other side of the door to be with each other you could just grab a toy and engage them both in a game, give them treats and affection. The game will allow them to concentrate on the toy rather than each other and they will come to associate the other cat with good things.

This article will give you some tips.

How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide

 

[elliesvictim]

Trim both their claws so they limit the damage they can do to each other.
Do some reading on cat body language such as nose touches and tail language. I do nose touches with my cat coz it tells me if she's cranky and it gives her a way to communicate with me.
Don't freak out, cats often look like they are being far more viscous than they actually are.
You may need to give it a little time and if you see them communicating well or getting on, hyper praise and treat.
Good luck

 

[DKM3921]

Thank you!!! Happy to say that following your advice they're now getting along They aren't perfect, but Misty (finally picked out a name for her!) no longer sees Salem as a threat. She gives him the occasional bop on the head when he invades her space too much, but no more hissing or growling. Caught them sleeping on the couch together with him grooming her.

There's one other thing I was curious about. He's fixed (has been for months), but about a month ago he started trying to (for lack of a better word) hump things? Usually it's this one blanket and we don't punish him or get upset; just let him do his thing (don't use that blanket anymore though. Once made the mistake of having it over my legs. Never again haha). I thought it was a result of having too much pent up energy and boredom. However, once we got Misty (and she let him within 5 feet of her) he keeps trying to mount her? She (also fixed) humors it for a couple seconds then turns around and smacks him a couple times with sheathed claws and runs away. It doesn't seem to be causing any harm, I'm just curious why it suddenly started? I understand the stress of a new cat could cause this to happen, but it began before we got Misty and there didn't seem to be any trigger for it.

 

[elliesvictim]

I'm no expert but I think desexed cat still have sex. They just can't reproduce and have a diminished sex drive. Add it to questions to ask your vet on your next visit.

 

[daisyd]

Read the below :

If you're concerned that neutering your cat will irrevocably alter his personality, don't worry -- he'll be just fine. In fact, some cats don't even lose the urge to mate after they've been neutered, though try as they may -- and they sure will -- they won't ever be able to reproduce.