New Cat Hiding

[susanm9006]

The picture at left is my beautiful but semi feral Willow. When I adopted her six years ago, she hid under a bed and refused to come out if I was in the room for many weeks. Not toys or treats or me hanging out in the room would tempt her out. So eventually I opened the door so she could explore while I slept. By the second night she had disappeared to a hiding spot I later found was inside the recliner sofa. Several weeks with no sign of her except I could tell she was eating and using her litterbox. Then she started to race from under the sofa to her safe room in the evening while I sat on it. It took even a few more weeks before she would go from room to room multiple times in the day and weeks after that before she would actually sit in a room with me present. Next she would come up along side me but tear away if I so much as looked down or reached for her. She would climb the back of the sofa and sniff my hair but if I turned to look at her she was gone in a second. It was maybe six months before she would allow me to touch her but when I did she was stiff and gave no reaction that said she enjoyed being petted. It was several years before she would come up to me and actually purr while I petted her. Now she will come up ever few days for a brief pet before sprinting off. But whatever room I am in she follows, she spends hours in the evening just staring at me and at bedtime every night she lies besides me for a brief cuddle and pet before heading to her sleeping spot at the foot of my bed. She has just started wanting to sleep near my head, doesn’t stay there the whole night but is inching forward. She has also started giving me a quick elbow lick as she gets near me. She may never be a “regular” cat but she is getting closer all the time. I treasure her as she is.

With some cats progress is measured in months or even years, but with patience she will come along. A sense of humor over their dramatics and stubbornness also helps.

 

[happilyretired]

Thanks for your suggestions! I've never had a 'hider' before either. My last two guys were exactly like your Ruby--totally at home within 15 seconds.

No, she doesn't eat in front of me. In the beginning, she seemed to only eat at night when I am sleeping, but now she'll eat in the morning, too, but only after she's convinced I'm occupied somewhere else in the house or I've gone out. She seems to keep good track of me:-)

I have wonderful sun in my house! The problem is that since she's been here, we've had a run of rainy, cloudy dismal days. This morning, there was great sun in the living room where she's hiding, but she wasn't tempted. My vet (and others here) have recommended a feather wand and/or laser light as 'irresistible to cats--but she must have a will of iron
because she ignores them.

She is actually freely exploring [I see evidence in the morning] and seems comfortable in the house; it seems to be ME she wants to avoid. I've managed to show her that I am the one dispensing the treats, but that doesn't seem to have improved her opinion of me.

I will check out that thread you referred to on strays and ferals. My first cat was a stray who adopted ME, and she was slightly wary, but she didn't hide at all and adjusted to me and the house within a day.

 

[happilyretired]

The picture at left is my beautiful but semi feral Willow. When I adopted her six years ago, she hid under a bed and refused to come out if I was in the room for many weeks. Not toys or treats or me hanging out in the room would tempt her out. So eventually I opened the door so she could explore while I slept. By the second night she had disappeared to a hiding spot I later found was inside the recliner sofa. Several weeks with no sign of her except I could tell she was eating and using her litterbox. Then she started to race from under the sofa to her safe room in the evening while I sat on it. It took even a few more weeks before she would go from room to room multiple times in the day and weeks after that before she would actually sit in a room with me present. Next she would come up along side me but tear away if I so much as looked down or reached for her. She would climb the back of the sofa and sniff my hair but if I turned to look at her she was gone in a second. It was maybe six months before she would allow me to touch her but when I did she was stiff and gave no reaction that said she enjoyed being petted. It was several years before she would come up to me and actually purr while I petted her. Now she will come up ever few days for a brief pet before sprinting off. But whatever room I am in she follows, she spends hours in the evening just staring at me and at bedtime every night she lies besides me for a brief cuddle and pet before heading to her sleeping spot at the foot of my bed. She has just started wanting to sleep near my head, doesn’t stay there the whole night but is inching forward. She has also started giving me a quick elbow lick as she gets near me. She may never be a “regular” cat but she is getting closer all the time. I treasure her as she is.

With some cats progress is measured in months or even years, but with patience she will come along. A sense of humor over their dramatics and stubbornness also helps.

You give me hope! I can be patient (although frustrated). My Molly [temporary name, as I need to have some contact with her before I 'know' the name] has had the door to her safe room open from the beginning. I initially had two food stations and two litter boxes in different places so that she might get to one or the other more easily. Amazingly, she seemed to 'know' where I kept the litter box [closet in my computer room] and where the food should be [kitchen], so she was roaming at night from her second day here. Last Saturday, she was in the living room, and I tried to get her to play with a few toys. She didn't, and I left them on the rug. Each morning, I'd see toys in different places, so I suspect she was also playing during the night.

When you say, "I treasure her as she is," you are echoing my 'cat philosophy.' Each of my 3 previous cats had very different personalities, and I loved them as they were. And that's how I plan to be with this one. You've encouraged me that eventually she won't totally avoid me, and even while she's hiding, I've bonded to her and love her.

So long as she's eating and using the litter box so I can monitor her well being, I can wait until she's ready to be more 'visible.'
'

 

[happilyretired]

We had a ‘breakthrough’ (of sorts), and I’m encouraged.

I went to sit in the living room and read, and she popped out from behind the table, eyeing me warily.
Right next to the table is the wing chair that has always been a favorite of my cats (and which I know she’s been in).
In retrospect, I think she wanted to take a nap in the comfort of the chair and was weighing whether her comfort was
worth trusting me to leave her alone.

As with cats, comfort won out, and she hopped into the chair—but still watched me. I tried to talk to her soothingly, and then I went back to my book—and she went to sleep! I’ve read that a cat will only sleep in your presence if he/she trusts you, so this may be a turning point for us.

Alas, after about an hour, I got up, and although I walked away from her toward the back of the house, she went back into hiding. After about 15 min., I went back to the living room. She was hiding—but she’d managed to eat all the treats I’d left for her—so while I was away, she’d crossed the room to near the chair I’d been sitting in.

Baby steps.

 

[susanm9006]

Thanks wonderful. She’s doing great!

 

[rubysmama]

Baby steps are good. Progress.

 

[happilyretired]

I was perhaps too optimistic yesterday! She is back to hiding, but worse, this morning she used the couch as a litter box!
She has never gone outside the litter box, but it's in a closet in a room where I use the computer. This morning, I was on the computer for quite a while very early, and I wonder whether she 'had' to go and did not want to risk being around me?

I work on the computer a lot, and she's never had an 'accident' before. I don't quite know what to make of this. Thoughts?

I offered her treats this morning, but she didn't emerge. I am no longer going to leave them for her. I will only put them out if she sees me--i.e., she doesn't have to approach, but she has to be visible; I'll put the treats down and leave.

 

[susanm9006]

Was this couch the one you were sitting on the previous day? If so, perhaps a message or marking it has hers.

 

[happilyretired]

No, I rarely sit on that couch.

 

[happilyretired]

I just wanted to let everyone who helpfully posted know that 'hiding' has an end! After 2 weeks, she emerged cautiously, and would stay in the same room with me--if I kept my distance. Today, 18 days from arrival, she welcomes my presence, has rubbed her heat and cheeks on my hand (marking me as hers!), and even 'invited' brief petting.

She can still be skittish, and I'm keeping the bedroom doors close until she seems entirely comfortable, but we seem well on the way to 'happily ever after.'

 

[susanm9006]

Outstanding! I think she is going to be a wonderful companion.

 

[rubysmama]

Great news! I love "happily ever afters".

 

[happilyretired]

I have to mention that I really couldn't settle on a name, and a friend suggested that since I liked Molly, she should be Molly Brown (as in The Unsinkable) because of all she's been through, and my friend didn't even know that she actually IS brown (brown mackerel tabby). It fit perfectly! I've used it today, and it is HER.

And just in time for me to order her personalized Christmas stocking.