Nervous About Getting A Second Cat...

[mcv585]

Hello! I've been thinking about getting a second cat for years now and I'm so nervous! I was wondering if anyone had any advice or could calm my nerves a bit.

I've have my male cat for four and a half years, since he was three months old. The first two years I had him, I also had a rabbit. He loved that bunny so much. He was devastated when it died. So I know he can be good with other animals, but he hasn't been around one in years. He is a really mellow cat - he's adorable and friendly but he's definitely not an alpha male. So I worry about him with another cat coming into his territory. I don't think he would protect his territory, he would just submit to another alpha.

I found this lovely little female cat who is nine months old and so loving and kind. Her personality reminds me a lot of my current cat. I would love to bring her into my home, but I'm so nervous about how it would go. My cat is my best friend, and I don't want to do anything to upset him. They did a test with her at the shelter to see how she reacted to other cats and she was hesitant but curious and just fine. I came home after visiting her yesterday and left my clothes out for my cat to smell. He was not happy at first, but then started investigating and seemed ok. Don't know if this was a good idea or not, but I thought maybe it could start getting him used to her smell.

Do you have any advice? Do you think two mellow cats with similar personalities could get along? Should I go for it? Or is it better to just leave things the way they are and have just one cat?

 

[thricenine]

I just did this (and posted the same kind of thread about being worried - my first cat is also my best friend). My cats are both younger than yours - Dinah is an almost 2-year-old territorial/kinda high strung female and Binx is a 3 month old neutered male. I was super worried about Dinah adjusting to a new kitten because she doesn't do well with change at all, and she doesn't like strange people much less strange cats but actually it went really well! It also went uncommonly fast? But both are very young, and both have the same friendly/curious sort of personality and love to play. Binx is a cuddler, tho.

I did a lot of scent-swapping, let Dinah sniff my hands after I'd played with Binx and used her favorite toys to play with him so she associated him with having fun. (She's not food-motivated so the feeding thing didn't work for me). For the first few days there was a LOT of hissing and growling from her and general unhappiness but I just made sure to go at Dinah's pace and let her have space/do her own thing. I was attentive to her and kept to our routine but didn't force her to play or do anything she didn't come to me wanting to do. By day 5 she'd touched noses with him and wandered away and by day 6 they were chasing each other around and play-fighting. I was prepared for it to take months and months of slow intros, but think it went so quickly because B is so young and hasn't developed cat manners/behavior yet so he is both tiny and wanted to make friends immediately.

But I totally think you can do it, and that cats do better in multiples. Dinah is definitely happier and much calmer now that she has someone to show the ropes/boss around a bit.

I ended up not fostering Binx before, but that was a cool idea that got suggested to me, that you could ask the shelter about.

I think one of each is a good mix when you've just got two. Girls are generally the boss of the house in my experience.

Does your current cat play very roughly? That's something I dunno about (since mine doesn't) and would just supervise carefully when they eventually have face to face introductions.

 

[DreamerRose]

I think your cats will get along just fine. I adopted a second cat and my resident cat was absolutely delighted to have a playmate. The important thing is to introduce the new cat slowly. There is an excellent article here on TCS that tells you how to do it: How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide

 

[mcv585]

Thanks so much! I really hope my introductions go as smoothly as yours did. When did you finally let them meet face to face? And how long was it before they were comfortable in the house together without you having to worry about any problems?

My cat is not rough at all. He's very kind and friendly and a bit of a pushover, so I'm hoping that the new cat doesn't walk all over him!

 

[mcv585]

I think your cats will get along just fine. I adopted a second cat and my resident cat was absolutely delighted to have a playmate. The important thing is to introduce the new cat slowly. There is an excellent article here on TCS that tells you how to do it: How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide

Thanks a bunch! I've read so many articles, but I'm still so nervous!

 

[DreamerRose]

Thanks so much! I really hope my introductions go as smoothly as yours did. When did you finally let them meet face to face? And how long was it before they were comfortable in the house together without you having to worry about any problems?

My cat is not rough at all. He's very kind and friendly and a bit of a pushover, so I'm hoping that the new cat doesn't walk all over him!

Mingo parked himself outside the door to the bedroom where I kept Lily as soon as I brought her in the house, so I knew he was going to get along with her. I rushed through the introduction somewhat because it seemed like they were getting along so fine. I let them eat on either side of the door with the door open a little so they could see each other. It was going so well, after site swapping and so on, that I let Lily out after only a week. Lily was a little anxious at first, but Mingo did nothing to threaten her, so she got used to him quickly. I guess it was probably a week later that I left them together while I went out, and when nothing happened, I stopped worrying about them.

Mingo is somewhat aggressive, but now the two will groom each other and share a chair or watch the birds together. I've had Lily about nine months. Mingo staked out two areas - my bed and the computer room - that he wouldn't let Lily come in, but he is relenting some on that. They play and rough house together, but if Mingo gets too rough, I interfere and make him stop. He is very sensitive to my direction, so he's learning to stop when she complains.

I don't think your new cat will walk all over the resident cat. Your existing cat may be like Mingo and be a little territorial about a few places he wants to keep for himself.

Good luck to you. Two cats are more fun than just one!

 

[tinkerbeltink]

Like you, I was nervous about a second cat. I considered it because I had a grown male who was loving, docile, had model behavior, etc., and I thought he might be lonely. I loved him and I thought he might enjoy a companion that was like him.

I introduced a kitten and saw a different side of him I had never seen before. I used common tips involving gradual introduction, etc. It was a month before I could trust him to be alone with her in another room. It's now been a few years. They now can sleep next to each other and play chase games. However, there is never mutual grooming and he will, sometimes, bully her by biting. They aren't best friends in the sense I thought they might be.

I was shocked because he is the total opposite with me and other humans. The cat he is to her and the cat he is to me is two totally separate cats. I've often wondered if his reaction to her has always been about her and not, necessarily, any kitten I would have introduced. I say this because she was a high maintenance kitten who was very destructive with tearing up carpet, furniture, etc. As an adult, she has a sweet nature, but dislikes being held. She is also slightly hyper, but this has been gradually improving with age. If he would welcome it, I think she would be totally receptive to mutual grooming, closeness, etc with him, but he won't do it. One of my reasons for my thinking his reactions to her are about her, specifically, is because he was once, briefly, around another kitten that was not mine and he was fine. He was younger and it was before I got this second kitten, but he was different with that one.

I am saying all this to suggest not to base the success of introducing a new cat fully on the personality of the first one. Mine was the perfect cat for a human. To this day, he has been an excellent pet. He just didn't react well to a second feline or the one I adopted in particular.

One thing you could consider doing is putting yourself on a rescue foster list. This might allow you to introduce a second cat, or cats, to see how things go with your own cat. If things go well, you could always proceed to adopt. I usually suggest this because cats can be so unpredictable in the "introduce a new cat" thing. This allows you to see if they are interested in being permanent friends and what you will be dealing with for the rest of their lives. I think this isn't just good for you, but good for them. Good luck!

Hello! I've been thinking about getting a second cat for years now and I'm so nervous! I was wondering if anyone had any advice or could calm my nerves a bit.

I've have my male cat for four and a half years, since he was three months old. The first two years I had him, I also had a rabbit. He loved that bunny so much. He was devastated when it died. So I know he can be good with other animals, but he hasn't been around one in years. He is a really mellow cat - he's adorable and friendly but he's definitely not an alpha male. So I worry about him with another cat coming into his territory. I don't think he would protect his territory, he would just submit to another alpha.

I found this lovely little female cat who is nine months old and so loving and kind. Her personality reminds me a lot of my current cat. I would love to bring her into my home, but I'm so nervous about how it would go. My cat is my best friend, and I don't want to do anything to upset him. They did a test with her at the shelter to see how she reacted to other cats and she was hesitant but curious and just fine. I came home after visiting her yesterday and left my clothes out for my cat to smell. He was not happy at first, but then started investigating and seemed ok. Don't know if this was a good idea or not, but I thought maybe it could start getting him used to her smell.

Do you have any advice? Do you think two mellow cats with similar personalities could get along? Should I go for it? Or is it better to just leave things the way they are and have just one cat?

 

[lalagimp]

Yue was mad! Tommy is an explorer and it was a small apartment so he decided he was going to be all over the place and she was yelling for the first day about what are you doing in my things?! She just couldn't believe the nerve of this guy. She's the cat that spent the first three days with me in the closet when she'd moved in. They were so opposite. I brought him home because I just knew he was amazing and she'd been smacking my dog around. Within the next two weeks she decided to start pooping in my bed. She's lazy so I put up a baby gate in my door way that Tom would just jump over, but she wouldn't. I took it down after a week or two and she didn't poop in my bed again.
They're actually really good to each other. She was about 5 months old and he was 2-3 months. Now they're 8 years old and we have other cats.

 

[mcv585]

Thank you everyone for all your help! I went and picked up my sweet little new kitty this morning and she has been cool as a cucumber all day. She is set up in the bathroom and is totally content and so loving and happy already. My resident cat was sniffing and staring at the bathroom door for a bit. He just seemed a little hesitant and curious, not upset at all. After about and hour or two, he is back to his normal schedule. He isn't acting weird AT ALL. I can't believe how calm both of them are. They may have even already glimpsed a peek of each other because I live in a small space so it's hard to keep them completely separate. I hope my cat will be welcoming when he finally meets her, but so far he doesn't seem upset at all!

 

[thricenine]

Congratulations!! I hope the introduction continues to go smoothly!