Needy Cat

[MorrisonsOwner]

My cat is a male 5-year-old tabby that is allowed indoors and out. He's a sweety, but also very needy. He will sit and stare at me until I "follow" him to where ever he wants to go. If I don't follow him, he will either just sit and stare at me creepily or start meowing. If I don't respond to the meows, he will start biting. Needless to say, I am always the one to break rather than him.

But 9 times out of 10, it is to follow him into the kitchen to his food bowl. He usually still has dry food in it from feeding time, so he'll eat that. It's almost as if he wants me to be in the room with him while he eats. I used to be away 10 hours a day for work and he found his food bowl on his own then, so I'm not sure why when I'm home he needs me there. Sometimes he'll notice I'm gone and come back to get me so I can watch him eat.

I'm now working from home, which makes it even harder. He is constantly coming to me not only to eat, but to be entertained. I know he can play on his own, and find his food on his own, but how do I break this behavior of depending on me? Most times I throw him outside just to get some peace, but as the winter months are coming, I'm a little worried.

I should also mention things I've tried:

• We have a birdfeeder that he watches
• I will sometimes move his food bowl into the office to get some peace
• He grazes on his dry food during the day but gets wet food at meal times
• I am a renter and my landlord has only allowed one cat, so a friend for him isn't an option
• He's an aggressive biter, so I don't want to ignore him and get to that point
• He has plenty of toys and can entertain himself with a single hairband

Thanks!

 

[ArtNJ]

Is there room on your work desk for a basket? If not, try a scratching post with a cup top that you can put nearby. If the cat can be nearby and maybe gets some pets now and then until he settles, that might help.

Its OK to tell a well bonded cat no, and to reinforce it, if need be, with a louder "no!" a clap or stomp. (I understand that doesn't always seem to work, but it should be tried. Biting to get attention is not ok, even if its relatively gentle.)

Giving in just makes things worse in the long run.

 

[Alldara]

Alternatively to the great suggestions above, or alongside ... Can you consider bringing a snack of sorts to your office for him? A treat ball or something? We bring our cat's dishes to the bedroom at night (also my office). It was just an easy compromise for our home. But it stays in the food area the rest of the day. We also had a couple of electronic toys for awhile that we could rotate out. It really was a matter of them settling in to our work at home routine, and also, making sure they get some before work play with us. I also try to spend 5 minutes or so on my lunch when I'm WFH.

If those things fail on a particular day, can you shut your door? Even just 15 minutes or so to say "hey. I'm not going to tolerate this behaviour." I would say each of my cats has had to have this punishment? at least once when getting used to WFH. Mostly Magnus. He will take a temper tantrum at the door, and we wait for him to calm down, or our meeting to be over. Whatever is first.

 

[Furballsmom]

but also very needy.

It's almost as if he wants me to be in the room with him while he eats.

There recently was another poster who had the same issue of his cat meowing and begging him to follow him to the food dish, and she actually wouldn't eat until and unless he was there. It got to be quite a problem. He's been gradually working to train her to learn it's ok to eat without him being "right there".

Can you consider something like clicker training, to not only engage a very smart brain but to help that when you click, then you'll throw a toy, or when he hears that click, then he should expect one treat, etc etc. to stop him from getting used to leading you to the food bowl.

The only thing I can think of as to why these cats do this is maybe because that's one way they can ensure your complete and undivided attention and/or a slightly different thought, they're taking advantage of their human being home all day, they love you and they want you off the computer box to be with them, but I'm guessing. They can often be like five year old children (said lovingly about both cats and children lol).

 

[Margot Lane]

I have no suggestions as I am ALso a wuss. But the hairband worries me. Depending on thickness, have read about cats swallowing hairbands, so, might keep an eye on that. (You might check out our PICKLE thread: a toy all cats seems to appreciate).

 

[danteshuman]

My guy is needy but I’m not working from home. My take? Teach your cat a schedule & give yourself a morning, lunch & afternoon break at set times. During those breaks give him some play and maybe a treat. If he starts to meow (since he is biter) tell him no or sush then ignore him. If he keeps it up, tell him no and kick him out of your office for 15-60 minutes (run a box fan or two to drown out the protest meows.) Stick to it & he will learn you you are working he can only get a quick quiet scratch and that you will take breaks at certain times to be with him.

Also give him a cst bed or chair nexy to you or your computer so he has a place to be by you while you work. Back when I had a computer, this arrangement worked and kept my very needy cat off the keyboard.

 

[ClumsyBear]

Oof I have a needy tabby as well.. I'm not sure if that's very helpful.. but I find that other than keeping him out of the room, bringing him into the activity works great. For example, I might explain what I'm working on, or talk to him while I'm exercising. When cooking, I might lift him up so he can see what I'm doing. He just likes being included, and eventually he's had enough and will do is own thing.
I think the big thing with working from home is meetings.. he's definitely tried to interupt them. I usually just apologize to my coworkers and by now they know he's a needy cat.. they usually ask to see him too, so I grab him and show him on camera. He gets attention and he's happy. Although he might remain next to me. I'll usually offer him a toy once it's time for him to go, and thay usually works - as opposed to just trying to get him to go away.. it's definitely more effort, but I found it's helped

 

[maggie101]

Would a trixie puzzle help?

 

[Neko-chan's mama]

My cat needs to be watched while eating too. Her feeding station is in the living room due to this. Could you move his kibble bowl to your office? Some cats feel safer if their humans watch them eat. I guess they trust us to not let anyone ambush them while they're vulnerable.

 

[MorrisonsOwner]

I have no suggestions as I am ALso a wuss. But the hairband worries me. Depending on thickness, have read about cats swallowing hairbands, so, might keep an eye on that. (You might check out our PICKLE thread: a toy all cats seems to appreciate).

Thanks for the concern! No worries though - it's the thick hairbands. I've watched him play with them many of times and he's never swallowed them, so I trust him with them. He likes to fetch/run after/catch them more than anything.

 

[MorrisonsOwner]

My guy is needy but I’m not working from home. My take? Teach your cat a schedule & give yourself a morning, lunch & afternoon break at set times. During those breaks give him some play and maybe a treat. If he starts to meow (since he is biter) tell him no or sush then ignore him. If he keeps it up, tell him no and kick him out of your office for 15-60 minutes (run a box fan or two to drown out the protest meows.) Stick to it & he will learn you you are working he can only get a quick quiet scratch and that you will take breaks at certain times to be with him.

Also give him a cst bed or chair nexy to you or your computer so he has a place to be by you while you work. Back when I had a computer, this arrangement worked and kept my very needy cat off the keyboard.

Thanks! We're working on a schedule, so hopefully that will help. Currently my office area doesn't have a door on it, so I'm working on remedying that too.

 

[maggie101]

I had a small piece of cardboard torn from a box. My cat went crazy over it. Ishe also likes playing in a box with chew toys and holes cut in it. She loves the noise a box or shipping paper make