Need some help with a new kitten

[amara]

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Hi all, I need some advice on a new 12 week old kitten.  We’ve had her three days now and she will not stop wailing-all day every day.  I realize she is probably scared being away from her mom and siblings, and I am hoping to find a way to make her transition easier on all of us.

We have her confined to our bedroom at the moment.  When someone is in the room she loudly meows or cries constantly from underneath the bed.  She very rarely comes out from there, and if she does, she won’t come anywhere near us.  Then she loudly meows (and sometimes howls) when she walks, meows sitting there, even meows grooming herself.

 The second she hears the door open for someone to leave, she starts screaming.  She doesn’t stop until that person reenters the room.  She does this when she hears the front door open when we come home from work and when we leave for work as well.  I can’t really comfort her, because she won’t come near me during the day.  It is starting to take a toll on us as she cries all night long preventing sleep, but if we leave the room she starts screaming so loudly I’m worried she will wake the apartment neighbors.  Last night she did crawl up on the bed with me for a while and as long as I petted her she would stop meowing, but the second I stopped she would start up again.  She is very nonaggressive-no biting, clawing etc.

I put a heating pad and a teddy in the bed we bought for her, but she refuses to sleep in it.  We’ve ordered some feliway and a snuggle kitty and those should be here tomorrow.  She has a clean bill of health prior to coming to us, but she also has a vet appointment tomorrow to make sure she is ok.  Can anyone give me any advice on how to handle this or should it stop when she gets more comfortable?

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[tulosai]

Hi! 

First, you are right that she is scared and confused, and yes, this behavior should stop or lessen once she gets used to you.  Do you know if she was particularly vocal in her old home?

Second, have you been talking to her? I'd try sitting in the room with her for a prolonged period of time and perhaps reading out loud to her or just talking to her.  Some cats find music soothing as well- harp music especially.

Normally it's best to let them come out on their own timetable, but since it's already been 3 days, there is no harm in trying to coax her out with a toy so long as you aren't insistent about it and let her play with the toy or not as she sees fit.  Interactive toys like da bird tend to work best for this.

She is also probably just lonely.  Might it be a possibility to get her a friend? She might do significantly better with a litter mate if that is financially possible for you, and I truly do think it's worth considering. 

Best of luck with your new addition  

 

[amara]

Thanks for the advice.  I don't know how much she talked before we got her, I can certainly check on that though. I have been talking to her and my husband and I talk to each other in the room so hopefully she is getting used to voices.  Unfortunately another cat isn't an option at the moment as much as I'm sure she would like to have one around.

I'll try doing some more coaxing with her and maybe some music will help.  I just worry we're doing something wrong!

 

[lamiatron]

 
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Hi all, I need some advice on a new 12 week old kitten.  We’ve had her three days now and she will not stop wailing-all day every day.  I realize she is probably scared being away from her mom and siblings, and I am hoping to find a way to make her transition easier on all of us.

We have her confined to our bedroom at the moment.  When someone is in the room she loudly meows or cries constantly from underneath the bed.  She very rarely comes out from there, and if she does, she won’t come anywhere near us.  Then she loudly meows (and sometimes howls) when she walks, meows sitting there, even meows grooming herself.

 The second she hears the door open for someone to leave, she starts screaming.  She doesn’t stop until that person reenters the room.  She does this when she hears the front door open when we come home from work and when we leave for work as well.  I can’t really comfort her, because she won’t come near me during the day.  It is starting to take a toll on us as she cries all night long preventing sleep, but if we leave the room she starts screaming so loudly I’m worried she will wake the apartment neighbors.  Last night she did crawl up on the bed with me for a while and as long as I petted her she would stop meowing, but the second I stopped she would start up again.  She is very nonaggressive-no biting, clawing etc.

I put a heating pad and a teddy in the bed we bought for her, but she refuses to sleep in it.  We’ve ordered some feliway and a snuggle kitty and those should be here tomorrow.  She has a clean bill of health prior to coming to us, but she also has a vet appointment tomorrow to make sure she is ok.  Can anyone give me any advice on how to handle this or should it stop when she gets more comfortable?

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this might seem evil, but my bf did this, and it worked wonders for me when we adopted Jet (10 weeks old female). she would go under the bed and NEVER come out. I wanted to give her her space so i never forced her out. but it was getting to the point where she wouldn't eat, she wouldn't do anything but stay down there and sleep. My bf literally taped the under of the bed with trash bags so none of my kitties could get other there. she hid from us for a while where ever she could (she would usually just go in her crate on under one of my pillows, which is better than being under the bed). she was forced to interact with us...and literallly in two days, she would greet us when we entered the room. She was a bit stand off-ish, when we tried to pick her up, but eventually that passed.

It seems extreme, but it worked for us. Maybe she needs to just get used to you guys. 

also please look into her breed. Some breed of cats are more vocal than others and will wail and cry and meow for hours on end. if that's the case, there's nothing really you can do. 

Just seems like she needs to get used to you guys and not the under of your bed. she likes company.

 

[lamiatron]

 
Thanks for the advice.  I don't know how much she talked before we got her, I can certainly check on that though. I have been talking to her and my husband and I talk to each other in the room so hopefully she is getting used to voices.  Unfortunately another cat isn't an option at the moment as much as I'm sure she would like to have one around.

I'll try doing some more coaxing with her and maybe some music will help.  I just worry we're doing something wrong!

just be patient, and loving, and caring like you have been. ask questions, get answers and never settle. you're doing the right thing =) you're gonna give your kitty a loving home. just make sure when she's in hiding she at least eats like she's supposed to and goes to the litter box. (or you can go the extreme route like me and my bf did..which i posted in another reply to this same thread).

go with your gut, but have confidence! you've already done the greatest thing ever by giving her a nice home =)

 

[xenot]

The only time I've heard of that kind of behavior from a cat was when my older sister got a kitten from a private owner.  The kitten was neurotic.  It screamed day and night and even hissed if you came near it at times.  It's ears were almost always in the downward angry and/or anxious position so they named him Yoda.  After a while, the kitten began driving her and her family crazy and this is a woman who really, really loves animals.  She finally took the kitten to the vet for a very thorough check up, because the last one turned up nothing, and low-and-behold, the vet found tiny needle marks between the kitten's toes and in other regions of his tiny body.  The vet suspected that the kitten came from a lab where they were injecting the cat with drugs or chemicals for testing purposes.  This was years ago and I don't know if that kind of cruelty still goes on.  The vet actually recommended that they put the kitten down because he was suffering from such chronic anxiety that was most likely impossible to remedy.  Your kitten does NOT sound as bad as the one my sister had, believe it or not.  But I still would urge you to check his/her body for needle marks if you don't really know the person from whom you bought the animal.  Poor thing.  I feel so sorry for him/her.  One thing I did for a very needy puppy was that I actually carried that little pooch in a fanny pack over my stomach day in and day out until she finally could be weened off of my constant vigil.  At the time, I had a very understanding boss who let me take this pooch to the office because she was quiet as long as I was there ... didn't make a peep in fact, and she didn't effect my job performance at all.  I don't know what your lifestyle will allow, but who knows, it might work!  You might also want to invest in an animal behaviorist if you just can't find a solution and you don't want to give up on the little guy/gal.

 

[amara]

Thank you everyone.  I think being able to be at home for the past few days helped quite a bit.  She has completely stopped meowing and screaming and has settled down quite a bit.  I've almost forgotten just how loud and unhappy she was!

She does still seem very scared of us humans and runs if she sees us walking in her direction or near where she is hiding.  She will play with the cat dancer toy or sit on the couch/bed with you as long as you don't try to move toward her or touch her.   I've been picking her up for a few minutes every day and brushing/petting/talking to her to try and get her used to me as well.  Hopefully with time she will come around.

 

[lamiatron]

 
Thank you everyone.  I think being able to be at home for the past few days helped quite a bit.  She has completely stopped meowing and screaming and has settled down quite a bit.  I've almost forgotten just how loud and unhappy she was!

She does still seem very scared of us humans and runs if she sees us walking in her direction or near where she is hiding.  She will play with the cat dancer toy or sit on the couch/bed with you as long as you don't try to move toward her or touch her.   I've been picking her up for a few minutes every day and brushing/petting/talking to her to try and get her used to me as well.  Hopefully with time she will come around.

you are doing the right thing! good luck to you =) i have a kitty in my home i'm working with now, she was a stray up until 3 weeks ago when we adopted her, so she exhibits similar behaviors to your kitty. Also try petting her softly and for limited amount of time while you're feeding or her she's eating. Let her know you're not just the food bringer, that you care and love her too. 

 

[jujubee]

One thing you could do when you're gone is to have the radio on, like on a talk show channel or something. Maybe the kitten will feel like there are people around. They do that at the shelter I volunteer at 

.