My cat's friend 'missing'

[Fijit]

Hi,

Long story, but...

A year ago my cat had kittens. They were all adopted and she was neutered and started getting fat, which I'm worried about and don't really know what do to much about. She's mainly an indoor cat but will go out into the front yard and venture into the neighbour's garden too.

Anyway, about 2 weeks ago, a stray that i had been feeding for 3 months decided he wanted to come in, because it has recently gotten cold.

I let him into the spare room. My cat hated him for the first 2 days but then got used to him and enjoyed having him around. She felt braver with him around and wandered more; she was more active. (Backstory: my cat got attacked when she was 6 months old and has been super scared/ nervous around other cats, apart from the father of her children, since then, so I was impressed at how well she took to him).

So I took the stray to the vet to get him checked over and it turned out he had a microchip and the owners wanted him back.

I was so disappointed but had to let him go.

Since then, my cat has seemed depressed. I can just see it in her eyes. She's not much of a cuddler anyway but since then she's been even more closed off.

What do i do?

I'm thinking of getting another kitten for her? But she is so nervous around other cats to start with and I'm scared she may not accept a new one.

 

[ArtNJ]

To accept another adult cat within two days is really unusual for an adult cat over two and makes me think there is a very good chance your cat will accept a kitten. If your cat is younger than two, they tend to have an easier time of it.

Being nervous around visiting outside cats doesn't really count. However, disposition is a possible wrinkle. If the "stray" was very chill, that might have made him easier to accept. A kitten will probably *not* be chill, and instead will quite possibly be totally relentless about trying to play, and could thus conceivably be harder than the stray, if the stray was very chill.

You might want to follow our guide this time around, even though things worked out so well last time:

How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide – TheCatSite Articles

 

[Fijit]

Yeah the stray was super chill. My cat hissed at him for 2 days and jumped near him trying to scare him and he stayed sat there, averting eye contact with her each time.

That's why i think she was okay with him so quick. I'm just trying to get advice on if you think she's depressed because she's lonely and if getting another cat would do her good.

Thanks

 

[ArtNJ]

You said she seemed to really enjoy having the other cat around and now seems depressed and your the best judge of that. I was just saying there is always a risk to adding another cat unless you are putting two kittens together which is basically risk free. If you could get an adult cat known to be super chill with other cats that might be best, but that is really hard to do. You need current information. That they were super chill with pets they have known for years is irrelevant, and that they did well when introduced to a new cat 18 months ago isn't really relevant either -- cats get worse at handling intros as they age. Kittens are generally the lowest risk option when you don't have this kind of reliable recent information to match two adult cats by temperment, and are always an excellent match for a young active adult cat. But in general you have to be prepared to introduce them slowly and put up with some stress for a while. You have to be prepared for the possibility that they will never be friends and your purpose won't be achieved.

All of that said, the fact that your cat did so well is encouraging, and either a kitten or an adult cat with a recent history of doing well with new cats would have a good chance. Just have a backup plan. Some shelters allow one to give back a kitten, for example.