My Cat is Too Spoiled and Difficult

kittyluv387

kittyluv387

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Just kind of venting here and would like to hear about other cats as well if you have any stories!

When I first got my 2nd cat Nemo he was a 2 year old stray. My old apartment had a lot of abandoned cats :(. He was very reserved, calm and well behaved! He did enjoy attention but didn't really seek me out. When I started living with my bf later he ended up adopting his own cat from my old apartment so we had 3 cats. We considered Nemo to be the "good" one. Nemo was reserved but I was very persistent and showered him with love and attention as I did with all the others. He slowly but surely came out of his shell and by the 2nd year he was like a totally different cat! He's now super affectionate, friendly and very brave. He will greet strangers. But problem is once we moved into a house a couple years ago he has started acting very demanding and bratty. He would walk around the house meowing constantly for attention. He would constantly have to be snuggling me. With all this extra space he's less interested in cuddling with the other cats. I also from time to time let him and the others go outside into the side yard while I supervise. Now he walks around meowing to be let out all the time. It sounds like he might be unhappy but I think he's so happy in a house with the extra space. He has aged backwards even though he is now 9 and will be turning 10 in March! The others have slowed down more with age but he is more active, alert and playful. And to be clear the others are demanding as well, they are used to getting tons of attention afterall but Nemo is on a different level. He has turned into a very vocal cat and you can just hear his brat tone when he's not getting what he wants. He is very healthy as well aside from his issues I manage and he gets regular dentals even because he is prone to plaque. So it's not like he has a new illness we don't know about because he looks great and nothing shows up in the blood test.

I don't know what's with him but while we are guilty of spoiling the cats we haven't spoiled him more than the others. And my bf and I get so sick and tired of him sometimes. He is so demanding! I feel like I need a nanny for him sometimes. And on top of that he has medical issues I have to manage. He is very prone to constipation so we have to give him lots of water in his wet food with miralax, probiotics and I basically have to wipe his butt with baby wipes everyday after he poops. I think he has slight mega colon from his stray days when he was obese. One of the neighbors got too excited about feeding him and I remember he was very very large. Now since he needs so much water he has the biggest pee clumps and they are also so annoying to deal with. I just feel kind of mad sometimes because I never wanted kids and I feel like I basically have a disabled child which is not what I signed up for. Our lives would be so much easier if we just had our other 2 cats. I know I sound horrible but I know I'm a very good cat mom to him. But I have to say I really regret taking him home with me sometimes because his personality and health issues are just a lot to deal with. But at the end of the day we love him and he is truly a sweet and friendly boy. We also don't want to be the 2nd owners to abandon him and plus he's going to be a senior soon. His original owners didn't contact the shelter when they were called. No real solution I guess. Who else is going to be able to deal with this demon cat?? Just venting and if there are any stories to relate to or laugh about I guess that's all that can be done about it.
 

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ArtNJ

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Its pretty normal that if you give a cat an inch, they want a mile. When I had indoor/outdoor cats, they thought I was a doorman and whined if they didn't like my job performance. And I've got one cat now that is very forceful about trying to come on laps, and another that whines for attention when bored.

As far as wanting to be near you, if your desk is big enough, a basket somewhere on the desk helps. If the desk isn't big enough, a scratching post with a cup top near enough for you to pet the cat. The idea is to redirect the cat to those spots so they dont have to be on you every second.

Whining for attention? Well, you can do some more cat enrichment stuff. Just cardboard boxes with holes in them can apparently be super fun (google for videos) -- I've never done it, but after watching the videos we plan too. And folks on here have many other ideas for cat enrichment. Might be an article on that, dont recall. Ultimately though, sometimes you do have to ignore the cat and/or clearly let the cat know "not now". Have to be more careful with a nervous cat, but you won't hurt your relationship with a well adjusted and bonded cat by lightly stomping your foot or clapping so they know not to climb on you.
 
danteshuman

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A set outside time everyday or a daily walk or better yet a catio should help. Nemo may be bored & meowing to go out....... but he settles for cuddles. Try playing with him more and hanging a bird feeder or two near a window. Then put a chair or cat tree or kitty ledge by the window so your kitties have a place to lay/sit while they bird watch (or as I call it “hunting with their eyes.”)

I have a clingy cat with a bit of separation anxiety...... when he was 3 months old he had a failed adoption of 2 weeks & it took him 6 months to get over his severe separation anxiety!!!!! I’m talking a month of loud panicked cries every time I showered becuase he did not want to go in the shower with me..., & being in the bathroom with me was not close enough...,, severe separation anxiety! During those 6 months, I did not react when he left the room I was in or came back in the room. I used to throw toys into the hall or the other room to try to encourage him to go into a room without me. It worked! (I give my boy tons of love and if he comes up to me and gets on my lap, I pet him for however long he wants.) So you might want to look at your response to him coming back in the room with you, to see if you are accidentally rewarding that behavior. 🤷🏻‍♀️
 
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kittyluv387 said:
Just kind of venting here and would like to hear about other cats as well if you have any stories!

When I first got my 2nd cat Nemo he was a 2 year old stray. My old apartment had a lot of abandoned cats :(. He was very reserved, calm and well behaved! He did enjoy attention but didn't really seek me out. When I started living with my bf later he ended up adopting his own cat from my old apartment so we had 3 cats. We considered Nemo to be the "good" one. Nemo was reserved but I was very persistent and showered him with love and attention as I did with all the others. He slowly but surely came out of his shell and by the 2nd year he was like a totally different cat! He's now super affectionate, friendly and very brave. He will greet strangers. But problem is once we moved into a house a couple years ago he has started acting very demanding and bratty. He would walk around the house meowing constantly for attention. He would constantly have to be snuggling me. With all this extra space he's less interested in cuddling with the other cats. I also from time to time let him and the others go outside into the side yard while I supervise. Now he walks around meowing to be let out all the time. It sounds like he might be unhappy but I think he's so happy in a house with the extra space. He has aged backwards even though he is now 9 and will be turning 10 in March! The others have slowed down more with age but he is more active, alert and playful. And to be clear the others are demanding as well, they are used to getting tons of attention afterall but Nemo is on a different level. He has turned into a very vocal cat and you can just hear his brat tone when he's not getting what he wants. He is very healthy as well aside from his issues I manage and he gets regular dentals even because he is prone to plaque. So it's not like he has a new illness we don't know about because he looks great and nothing shows up in the blood test.

I don't know what's with him but while we are guilty of spoiling the cats we haven't spoiled him more than the others. And my bf and I get so sick and tired of him sometimes. He is so demanding! I feel like I need a nanny for him sometimes. And on top of that he has medical issues I have to manage. He is very prone to constipation so we have to give him lots of water in his wet food with miralax, probiotics and I basically have to wipe his butt with baby wipes everyday after he poops. I think he has slight mega colon from his stray days when he was obese. One of the neighbors got too excited about feeding him and I remember he was very very large. Now since he needs so much water he has the biggest pee clumps and they are also so annoying to deal with. I just feel kind of mad sometimes because I never wanted kids and I feel like I basically have a disabled child which is not what I signed up for. Our lives would be so much easier if we just had our other 2 cats. I know I sound horrible but I know I'm a very good cat mom to him. But I have to say I really regret taking him home with me sometimes because his personality and health issues are just a lot to deal with. But at the end of the day we love him and he is truly a sweet and friendly boy. We also don't want to be the 2nd owners to abandon him and plus he's going to be a senior soon. His original owners didn't contact the shelter when they were called. No real solution I guess. Who else is going to be able to deal with this demon cat?? Just venting and if there are any stories to relate to or laugh about I guess that's all that can be done about it.
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Sounds like you and he may not be a good personality match.

Some people like cats that are vocal and demand attention - to you he’s the demon cat, to someone else he might be the best cat ever. I have a friend with a highly vocal/demanding cat who thinks it’s adorable and holds entire conversations with him.

I’d suggest you start looking for another home for him. You shouldn’t have to put up with a cat that drives you nuts, and he should have an opportunity to have a human that appreciates his personality. Maybe you can just be his foster human while you help him find his forever human.

When it’s not a match it’s just not a match. You’ll have helped him even if your home is just a stop on his journey to his forever home.
 
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