My Cat Is Completely Uncooperative

[elliesvictim]

I have an 18 month old sexed female. She was feral at 2 months when I found her. I love her to bits but she has to be dragged kicking and screaming to do anything. In fact almost all her favourite things ATM she once had to be held, coaxed and treated to try.
She loves sleeping on the couch next to me when I watch tv. I knew she'd love it but she was so resistant it took months of training. Now whenever She lies on the couch she purrs, stretches out, face smashes and snuggles.
ATM it's cold at night so I'm trying to get her to sleep inside my jumper/jackets for warmth, so she's warm and it frees up my legs that she normally sleeps on. But she is so stubborn, She sits there, warm mind you, giving me death stares and lip licking. She's so stubborn I've seen her shake of purring.
Does anyone else have a stubborn $h!t. Is this something that will pass?

 

[Willowy]

I'm not really sure what the problem is. If she doesn't want to sleep in a sweater don't force it. She's acting like a normal cat. They haven't been bred to work with humans like dogs have. They retain a certain distrust that can only be overcome with a strong relationship.

 

[mizzely]

My cats still don't like sleeping in a sweater/ jacket and I've had them for 15 and 7 years lol

 

[elliesvictim]

She sleeps under the doona, under my nose at night. She sleeps under the doona sometimes by herself. If I leave clothes out of the basket she lies on them. She sleeps on my chest and legs at night on the couch. It's not such a leap to be under my jumper/jacket to keep warm. We're having a bad cold spell where we are. I'm just trying to keep her warm. I'm sure she'll love it if she wasn't so resistant. I limit the amount of stuff I try to get her to do because she's so difficult. Her default seems to be panic! I was hoping someone has had the same and would say it passes.

 

[basscat]

I think you might have a cat.

 

[margd]

It sounds like you have a couple of problems: one is getting her to stop sleeping on your legs and the other is that she panics as a default mode.

The problem with her sleeping on your legs is not that she's not warm. If she wasn't warm enough, she wouldn't sleep there. Of course, you are absolutely right that she would also be warm if she slept under your jumper but cats are independent thinkers and are not easily convinced to change their ways. (As you are finding out with your girl!) The problem is that by sleeping on your legs, she is getting the warmth she needs from your body heat, as well as something else that the jumper can't give her - she has the reassurance and comfort of her human right there.

Just in case I have misinterpreted your post - are you urging her to sleep under your jumper at night while you are wearing it? This would seem to be ideal since she would have your body heat as well as the comfort of your presence but again - try to tell a cat that. You really can't force her to do this - you can only make it more inviting than your legs so that she decides on her own that sleeping against your chest is the better place to be. The time honored way to do this is by giving a treat when she's where she should be and withholding it when she's not. Unfortunately, she might go back to your legs once the treats stop coming because she likes it there, for whatever reason. One of those reasons, btw, may be that she prefers to feel unconfined in which case she may never accept sleeping under your jumper with you.

An alternative that might also help is to invest in a self-warming bed or a bed with a heating pad in it and put it on the bed with you. There are lots of products on the market so try a search and see if any of them seem like they might do the trick.

The second, and much deeper problem, is that she defaults to panic mode, as you put it. This may be in part due to her being feral up until two months, but may also be part of her natural personality. She is still quite young and it sounds like you have done very well with her so far, for example you have successfully convinced her that sleeping on the couch next to you is lovely, not scary. As long as you are persuading her by positive reinforcement and lots of affection, her trust in you will continue to grow. It may take awhile - every cat is different - but this automatic fear does subside quite a bit in many timid cats who are given the love and reinforcement they need.

You might find this article on behavior modification helpful. Here is another article with hints for dealing with timid cats that may also be useful.

Good luck with your girl. It sounds like she is very lucky to have such a caring human in her life.