my cat bites my brother my mom and i

[sofia123]

just a couple weeks ago my cat started biting everyone except my dad but here is a list of all the things bad that happened in her life so please try to figure something out                                 

                                           bad things: spayed, separated from sibling, left behind when family is on vacation , badly treated by my brother at early age and that is all

 

[yayi]

Why is spaying a bad thing? 

 What happened to her sibling?

The rest of the things you mentioned is not only bad but cruel. 

It is unclear about the biting. Does your cat go around looking to bite you? Or does she do it when you pet her? The best thing to do is to have her checked by your veterinarian. It is likely there are health issues and being in pain might be one of them. 

 

[mservant]

A couple of other questions:

How old is your cat?  And, when you say badly treated, what type of thing and was it just once or a number of times?

When she was separated from her sibling was it when she was adopted by your family or at a different time, and how old was she?  Do you know how old she was when she was separated from her mom?

When left alone when people were on vacation was your cat left totally on her own with some way to get food, or was someone else coming in to feed her?  How long was she left like this? Was it a few days or a few weeks?  Was it quite recently?

I am sorry your cat is biting people but it is good that you want to understand why she is doing this, and maybe to help her. 

 

[sofia123]

she got separated from her siblings when we got her because they were not adopted yet. but I told my mom we should tell a vet but she says we should handle her but at vets are nice to her but my mom is not nice to her and she bites if you pet her the wrong way and also if you stare into her eyes and they dialate 

 

[sofia123]

she was 4 months when we got her and when we got her I do not know if she had a mom anymore. and badly treated is being kicked and yelled at and people were coming to feed her but alone without my family and she got separated when we adopted her

 

[mservant]

This is a sad story and I hope you are able to help her.  Your little cat does not sound like she has had much of a chance to learn to trust people, and her biting may be to defend herself as she has had bad experiences with people before.  

Most cats do not like to be looked at straight in the eye, direct eye contact is s threatening thing for cats and they will want to defend themselves even more or to run away if people do this to them.  If you look a cat straight in the eye it is best to blink and look away if you want them to feel less threatened.

If a cat has been hurt and hit by people it will take a lot of time and gentle treatment to regain trust, and if people go near , or touch a cat that has been hurt in this way then biting is one of the few ways it has to defend itself.

If your cat has been kicked it is possible she has internal injuries that could be causing pain and maybe serious illness. If she has internal injuries and pain this will make her bite even more, especially when people touch her.  It would be best for her to be seen by a vet.  Is it possible for you to get her to a vet?

Thank you for wanting to help her and to make her life better.

 

[sofia123]

she is probably not hurt but she bites me like 10% my brother 40% my mom 49% and my dad1% and I will get back to you if she goes to a vet.

 

[sofia123]

oh and when I look at  her straight in the eye I do blink and look away but the only one who does not blink and look away is my dad. and I think this is just sad but my friends call her evil and fat but she just does not trust some people and she is a longhair.

 

[Willowy]

Look, if your mom isn't nice to her it's no wonder that she bites. Cats who are abused almost always become aggressive. She needs to be able to trust you and everybody else she lives with. If your family members cannot behave in a trustworthy way I don't think anything will change.

 

[sofia123]

My mom does not abuse her but just does not like my cat

 

[Willowy]

Cats can tell when they aren't wanted :dk:. It's a negative feeling and of course they react to it. The only advice I can give is that people shouldn't touch her when she doesn't want to be touched.

 

[mservant]

If you want to play and touch your cat when she chooses to be near you but there is lack of trust because of all the other things that you describe, you can try to build up some trust and learn signals using things like wand toys.  If she is intersted in these you can play with her at arms length, interact and bond with her, but also touch her with them and start to understand where she feels OK being touched and where she doesn't?

 

[mservant]

Another thought, does she have any high spaces and safe spaces she can go to when she wants to?

 

[sofia123]

she does not but we are going to get her a climbing perch but her safe spot is sitting on her chair or rug. and I do not want you guys thinking that my mom abuses her so please do not think that.

 

[mservant]

Please believe, I am just trying to find out a little bit about your cat so people reading this post can try and help you to make changes for her.  I do not want to make any assumptions and my experience of this site is that most other people do not do that either. Everyone here loves cats and we want to support people who are looking to help their cats, whether it is about health, or behaviour, or any other area of humans and cats sharing their space together.

It is good to hear she has places where she feels safe and that you are looking to get a climbing perch for her.  It can give them their own viewing place, and the more a cat feels they can see what is around them and have some control of their environment the better the chances of them feeling safe and relaxed there.  How old is your cat, and what is her name. I assume you have her photograph as your avatar:  She has a very cute face:-)

 

[sofia123]

she is about 2 1/2 and her name is sofia but we call her sofie

 

[mservant]

Pretty much the same age as my Mouse then!  He'll be 3 in February.  She is still quite a young cat.  I am sure if you can give her more safe spaces around her home, that she knows where she is welcome and loved and where she can go when she feels anxious, then you can start to rebuild trust, get to know each other again, all start to feel happier around each other.  

Is your brother still there / very young?  Does he still live in the house?  Is Sophie still coping with the behaviours that were not good from him or has that now stopped? 

 

[sofia123]

yes my brother still lives with us but he stays away from her and when we got her he was10 and now he is12

 

[sofia123]

 without cats life would be a mistake

 

[mservant]

OK, so am I along the right lines in thinking we have a 2 1/2 year old cat and a family that need to build up trust and learn about what is and isn't OK for each other so that things can relax a bit?  And that you want to be able to play and stroke Sophie and be fairly confident she is OK about it and won't bite? 

Also that you love your cat, your mum isn't a cat fan, and your cat and your brother keep their distance?  I'm not sure about your dad, whether he wants to be around your cat or not?

Is Sophie indoors all the time or does she get out?  If she is indoors or indoors most of the time does she choose to be in the family living areas or in your room?  Is there a choice for her?  Is there any tesnion around her food, litter or fur getting all over things and needing cleaned up (as she will probably pick up on these things).  And what toys and play things does she have to keep herself busy doing cat things when she wants to be active but not play with people?  Young cats usually need quite a bit of activity at that age and she will have more pent up energy and frustration if she hasn't got enough to do, and be at more risk of stress and depression.

  Gee, sorry, I am full of questions tonight!