Just thought I'd post here as well. Reading the previous posts on this thread has been therapeutic, but I'm heartbroken right now. I have a colony that currently numbers, all together, around 11, the majority TNRd, with varying degrees of socialization and frequency of visits. Six of them, I would call my "regulars", they show up every day, have bonded to me very well, some of them let me (and sometimes demand that I) pet them. The others come and go, are still somewhat afraid of me, but do show up to eat every now and then. Anyway, four days ago (today is the fifth day), one of my "regulars" disappeared. She just did not show up for the morning feed with the others. I was a little concerned at first because she has not missed a day in over six months, but didn't panic immediately. However, she has not shown up over the weekend either, and now I fear the worst. She was one of my favorites, very friendly, very playful, I had designated her the queen of the colony. It had taken me a long time to trap her for the TNR process, but I managed a few months ago. She would greet me every morning and every evening. She has essentially been a staple of my life for more than a year. It's unbearable to think I will not see her again, but in my heart of hearts I know that to be true. This is very unlike her. I have no idea what could have happened to her, I walked around the complex and drove around the parking lot but did not see her anywhere. About 7 months ago, I had another beloved one disappear the same way. It's probably the only bad part about caring for ferals that I can think of.