- Joined
- Sep 2, 2014
- Messages
- 6
- Purraise
- 4
I have an appointment to euthanize at home tomorrow. This is so hard! With my two dogs, it was obvious -- crisis on the one hand, and the end of golden years on the other. My 13-year-old kitty (who I have only had less than two years, boo!) has lymphoma, chemo has stopped working, and basically I think I am euthanizing to avert panic/crisis. I look at all of the little self-quizzes, and yes, my kitty is eating, drinking, purring, wants to go outside. He is not in pain. But at times the past 5 days he is very low energy, and the mass in his throat is clearly growing, as he sounds at times like a pigeon, a honking Canada goose, or a kid with whooping cough. Seriously, gasping at times the past day or so.
I'm pretty sure, and my vet agrees, that this could now grow very fast (he had chemo 5 days ago, and we are thinking it is not working), and overnight I could find myself with a panicked kitty doing open mouth breathing. I want to avoid that, avoid having t throw him in the car in the middle of the night. But this is so hard, because he's begging to go outside right now. He's head butting me. He stalked a squirrel two hours ago.
But, he sounds terrible. And I know how it feels to have an asthma attack and feel like you cannot breathe. And this is a tumor, growing, so it can only get worse.
It is so hard how it changes every 30 minutes. Sometimes he settles down to sleep and you cannot hear his breathing much at all. Then other times I can hear him across the house, and he sounds like he is strangled.
Ok, so am I doing right by him? 20 hours to go. We had a nice day: salmon, snuggles, strolling the neighborhood, napping together in the sun on my bed. Just about perfect, actually. Maybe a nice note to end on. I want him to die peacefully.
Thanks.
I'm pretty sure, and my vet agrees, that this could now grow very fast (he had chemo 5 days ago, and we are thinking it is not working), and overnight I could find myself with a panicked kitty doing open mouth breathing. I want to avoid that, avoid having t throw him in the car in the middle of the night. But this is so hard, because he's begging to go outside right now. He's head butting me. He stalked a squirrel two hours ago.
But, he sounds terrible. And I know how it feels to have an asthma attack and feel like you cannot breathe. And this is a tumor, growing, so it can only get worse.
It is so hard how it changes every 30 minutes. Sometimes he settles down to sleep and you cannot hear his breathing much at all. Then other times I can hear him across the house, and he sounds like he is strangled.
Ok, so am I doing right by him? 20 hours to go. We had a nice day: salmon, snuggles, strolling the neighborhood, napping together in the sun on my bed. Just about perfect, actually. Maybe a nice note to end on. I want him to die peacefully.
Thanks.