Kitty's giving me the cold shoulder lately

[runekeeper]

I mentioned this in my recent thread in the Nutrition section. My Kippy, while certainly eating better than before, has begun acting differently. He used to be a very vocal, perky, affectionate cat, and while he does have his moments of being bright-eyed and bushy-tailed still (like when he knows he's going to get fed or when I can get him to play), he is otherwise lethargic and acts rather distant from me.

Some of this I figure I can chalk up to age and sickness (fatty liver disease), but the thing is he perks right up when he sees my boyfriend. I don't know why, but he adores this man and acts very much like his old self. He won't give me the time of day anymore, though. If I put my hand down to try and call him over, he looks the other way. He won't cuddle or headbutt me anymore, which he did a lot in the past. And while he has always been a temperamental cat, he seems to have more mood swings now than before, complete with growling, scratching, hissing and biting.

I can get him to purr still, especially when I use his favorite brush on him. I haven't been doing anything differently like medicating him, and I try not to overstimulate him since that sometimes gets him riled up. He just isn't as happy as before and I don't know if it's something I'm doing wrong or not. I thought with a better appetite might come better behavior. He doesn't get up and walk away from me or hide from me, but he acts like he puts up with it when I try to snuggle him.

Some days he's better than others, but it seems like the "blah" days are becoming the norm anymore. He doesn't seem to be depressed; I've seen him like that and he will just lay on the floor and stare into space for hours, won't even get up to eat or drink. No, he definitely has the ability to get up and move, and he does. He hops up into his favorite nap spots, cleans himself, eats, uses the cat box normally, goes up and down the stairs just fine. He just seems annoyed with me and I don't know why.

I don't want to just cut off all physical contact with him, but I worry I'm going to smother him with attention and make him upset. I miss my kitty, but I'm not sure what to do.

 

[ritz]

I have this issue sometimes with Ritz, I felt a strong dis-connect between the two of us in late Spring/early Summer. In fact, it bothered me so much I contacted an animal communicator, who helped me understand Ritz and myself a lot more. (Ritz is my first cat ever, female, and I live alone.)
Cats have their own issues, their own processes to deal with, to think about and resolve within themselves, albeit on a much different level than us humans.
So maybe Kippy is just becoming more secure within himself, now that he is eating better. And processing his getting older.
Also, change--no matter how good/bad--is disrupting to cats. So maybe this is a reason for his moodiness.
What I did is to talk to Ritz and tell her she could do what she wanted to do, I'd try to back off. But I would love her no matter what.
I made a point of NOT approaching her, of letting her call the shots, so to speak.
And I understand the 'he loves Boyfriend more than me': finally after four years, Ritz is now approaching my twin sister for cuddles and belly rubs. I view it as an enriching experience for Ritz, different petting, etc. And try not to be jealous.

 

[runekeeper]

I don't think anything has changed that would affect Kip like this. I have learned over the years that he reacts very badly and very easily to stress and I try to make sure nothing changes unless it absolutely has to. But nothing lately has changed; no new animals or people in the house, didn't move house, no new litter or food (the kind he eats now he did have in the past). He did get his blankets washed a couple weeks ago, and I had to take his scratching post upstairs to fix it yesterday, but that's about it as far as changes.

Kip seems to be possibly heading toward going off his food again, but he seemed a little tiny bit happier today. I swear it's like he's better when he's not eating. I don't mind giving him some space if that's what he wants/needs, but I don't want to totally neglect him and ignore him. I'm just not sure where to draw the line so he knows I'm still here for him, but he's also not getting overstimulated and angry.

I love cats, but Kip is my fourth cat and he's so vastly different from my other ones. Caspurr and Rolly were never like this, and Rolly only became distant from me when he was dying. But Kip seems okay physically...or, at least he seems the same as he has been the last few months, so I don't think that's the case with him. And him still being affectionate toward my boyfriend leads me to believe he has a problem with me specifically. I know I'm taking it way too personally, but he's my only kitty I have left and I admit it makes me sad when he seems to uninterested in contact with me. It means a lot to me when he'll just give my hand a simple headbutt, but he's doesn't even seem to want to do that anymore.

Oh what I would give if he could just speak English for two minutes and tell me what he wants me to do...or not do.