Kitten acts differently when 4 yo comes back from school

[whwmia]

The kitten spends the night in the safe room with access to toys, food, litter and water.
In the morning I play with the kitten and replenish food and water, and clean the litter box. Then I leave the safe room door open for the kitten to explore. Throughout the day the kitten brushes past me and plays with me whilst I work and is relaxed and happy.
As soon as my daughter comes home the kitten is up for playing, and they both do. I’ve noticed approx 1.5 to 2 hrs later my daughter and the kitten seem agitated with each other. My daughter just wants to sit and watch tv but the kitten keeps trying to pounce at her feet, which my daughter is scared of.
The kitten isn’t interested in playing with me at that point, then starts to claw at the furniture. For the past few days I’ve had to get the kitten to follow me to the safe room where I use the puzzle toys as distraction and set up the tunnel and hammock. Then I make sure all is clean and topped up and say my goodnight and leave the room closing the door behind me.
Until I fall asleep I keep the baby monitor dialled in, so I can hear what the kitten is doing. From the noises I can tell the kitten plays around, has some food then I assume has gone to sleep.
I’m starting to wonder if the kitten is overstimulated with my daughter and I have to adopt this separation of both for a few weeks to keep them both safe. Or am I missing the trick here? Has anyone else experienced anything similar? We’ve only had the kitten for just over 2 weeks, and it’s only been a week since the kitten has been allowed to explore the house.

 

[ArtNJ]

Kittens, cats really, can start pouncing feet/legs randomly, one person but not another. All of that said, a 4 year old with untied shoelaces, not to mention legs dangling and/or bouncing around (ie. 4 y.o. stuff) would be irrestible and could have been how this started. Doesn't really matter, at this point its just a training task. (Well, do make sure the shoelaces are tied.) Have your daughter say "no!" really loudly. Usually works, although kitten may keep coming back for a bit.

 

[whwmia]

Kittens, cats really, can start pouncing feet/legs randomly, one person but not another. All of that said, a 4 year old with untied shoelaces, not to mention legs dangling and/or bouncing around (ie. 4 y.o. stuff) would be irrestible and could have been how this started. Doesn't really matter, at this point its just a training task. (Well, do make sure the shoelaces are tied.) Have your daughter say "no!" really loudly. Usually works, although kitten may keep coming back for a bit.

She definitely does bounce around lol, even when watching tv she's constantly changing positions, she just can't help it by the looks of it. Yesterday was a bit more civil between them, when I do sense they're both getting tense with each other I take the kitten back to the safe room and close the door for about an hour, generally to find the kitten's fallen asleep within minutes. I spend an hour or 2 in the safe room reading/on my phone to give the kitten company afterwards. Yesterday I opened the door again to let the kitten make it's way back up and everything was fine.

 

[Kflowers]

If saying no doesn't work, teach her to hiss at the kitten when she claws, bites, or pounces when your daughter doesn't want to play. This is the way kittens tell each other no. The yip thing is more a dog/puppy thing. Kittens can hiss at 4-5 weeks and do it to show 'don't do that"

Odds are your daughter will enjoy talking cat to the kitten. It won't hurt the kitten if she gets a little spit on. Hissing without spitting is a matter of practice.

 

[whwmia]

She has been trying to hiss at the cat.

I'm at my wits end now, my husband keeps saying I didn't think it through and now it's my fault our daughter doesn't feel safe in her own home. He's asking me to rehome the kitten.

I'm feeling really down today.

 

[Gem90]

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. It's hard enough getting a kitten without added pressure from family members. Two weeks is not a very long time at all for a new pet to settle in or for you to all find your feet with the new routine.

The kitten is probably used to playing rough with littermates and no longer has them around, so it's looking to you and your daughter for that kind of play. The hissing should help it learn when enough is enough. Removing it from her presence for short time outs may do the same so it learns pouncing = no playtime.

Kittens will always have lots of energy, but could you try really tuckering it out just before your daughter comes home with a wand toy or a puzzle feeder? The more tired it is when she comes home, the less excitable it will be and the quicker it will settle when your daughter's had enough.

Also, what kind of play is happening between the kitten and your little girl? Does she know how to recognise overstimulation? Does she have kicker toys ready to throw to the kitten if it starts clawing or biting? Is she petting too much or in the wrong places? Possibly that long 1.5-2 hour session is sending the kitten into overdrive where it literally can't calm down. Our cat claws up the furniture with his ears flat and his tail thrashing just before a case of zoomies, and usually if it's got to that point, I've played with him too hard and I need to walk away.

A second kitten would mean they play together and tire each other out so there's less onus on you, but I know that's not always plausible and right now probably seems a ridiculous suggestion. A slightly older cat might also be a better fit for you. Your daughter can gain some confidence with how to interact with cats, and the cat will be more chill. Kittens can genuinely be a nightmare if they don't know how to play nice. It can be a long process. As I said, two weeks is not long at all.

If you do have to rehome him, don't feel too bad. If it's not a good fit right now, it's not a good fit. A kitten will get snapped up in no time, and you could look at adopting older?

 

[Gem90]

Also had a thought — when is the kitten getting fed? Ideally, a good play session is followed by a meal. Then they groom and go to sleep. A few hours later, they do it all again. Could you shorten the play session between your kitten and your daughter — an hour tops, say — feed the kitten, and see if it settles to sleep?

 

[whwmia]

Also had a thought — when is the kitten getting fed? Ideally, a good play session is followed by a meal. Then they groom and go to sleep. A few hours later, they do it all again. Could you shorten the play session between your kitten and your daughter — an hour tops, say — feed the kitten, and see if it settles to sleep?

Hi Gems

Thanks for your response, I've honestly been feeling so alone with my thoughts today.

I booked myself 20 mins from work today to step away whilst daughter is home and tire out the kitten, fortunately it worked out just as the kitten was looking to pounce around, now the kitten is sleeping just outside my office door and daughter is colouring away. My little girl uses a wand sometimes, but her fave is a chewing worm toy she throws around. She doesn't pet the cat much as she's scared of the claws.

The ups and downs are crazy at the moment.

The meal times I'm still trying to figure out, I leave wet food in the morning and dispose the remaining at lunch time then put down some dry food at lunch and some more dry food just before bed time. The kitten's feeding is all over the place, I just bought a camera to workout when the kitten is feeding and how many times.

 

[ArtNJ]

Personally, I think (1) a little girl can probably say "no!" more loudly than she can hiss; (2) its the volume that matters and (3) a little girl's hiss likely doesn't sound much like a cat's hiss.

Its clear that hissing can work, but I personally suspect its less effective than a loud no, just because its easier for a human to up the volume on a loud no enough to be mildly startling to a cat. One doesn't have to shout, but it does have to be louder than a speaking voice.

 

[Gem90]

So glad the timing worked out today and your daughter is able to enjoy some quiet time. Kittens really do have so much energy, but if you can try and develop a routine, it will learn when the playtimes are and sort of adjust its energy levels around you. And the kitten stage doesn't last forever.

That's great that she's using toys — my young nephews didn't realise the implications of teasing the cat with their hands and stuff so that's why I asked.

Here is where other members will have better advice about feeding, but kittens eat a lot and often. You don't mention how old it is but if it's less than 7 months it probably needs several feeds throughout the day. It's harder to know how much it's eating if it's allowed to graze though.

I'm sorry you've felt alone today. It's not fair that you're having to work this out on your own or take any blame for getting a kitten in the first place, but that's a different conversation! You're on the right forum for advice and support.

 

[japam]

go to your local pound store and get a can of air duster for computers, when the kitten is playing too rough, or doing something you disapprove, squeeze the button, the sound is like a hiss and the kitten will hopefully deduce, hey i got to back off, the can does not have to be physically in your hand, you can have it in your trouser or cardigan pocket and perform the operation.

Feeding i would probably suggest three times a day depending on age, ideally wet food, last meal around 10pm, with probably a bowl of nibbles in his room, and water to tie him over till you get up in the morning.

I would space the meals at 6-8 hours apart.
so i.e.
7am - 3pm - 10pm as long as you have a set time 'routine', the cat will regulate them self, and wait in anticipation as the time approaches for the next meal time.

 

[GustifursMom]

Buy a SmartyKat Hot Pursuit Cat Toy Concealed Motion Toy https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B06WP7F8YC/?tag=


This will entertain and tire out the kitten in their safe room.

My kitten absolutely loves this.