Is there really a dominant cat between my two?

[BeccaT]

I want to start by saying this isn't really a concern to me! It's more curiosity.

So I've always been curious about the dynamic between my two cats. The cat we had first is the youngest, we did want to get a younger second cat when we adopted her but it didn't quite work out due to some miscommunication on the shelter's part. My girls aren't the best of friends, but they do get along to a degree. I see them more as like when you see two kid siblings who fight a lot and sometimes get a bit rough, but deep down they love each other and when one is missing or trapped somewhere, the other is right there because they're concerned about them. They just aren't the most affectionate towards each other in a "regular" way, is how I see it.

Our youngest Annie we've had since she was a kitten and she hadn't been around other cats since then. Our second cat April was a few months older than Annie when we adopted her and had previously been in a foster home with other cats, so clearly she'd had more experience with other cats. I know you can't choose these things or force them to happen, but I always hoped Annie would remain the dominant one as I was scared she'd be upset with us for introducing another cat into her home that then became the dominant one, especially when they're not the best of friends.

I've read different things about how dominant cats act towards the other cat(s), and both of my cats show dominant behaviors differently. For example, Annie is always the one to groom April and she only really grooms her head. April never grooms Annie. But recently my husband told me that he read the dominant cat is the one to eat first at meal times, and the non-dominant one won't eat until the dominant one is. We have an automated feeder so their food gets dispensed at the same time, and even if Annie is closer to the feeder at the time, she'll always wait for April first before she starts eating. April is usually the one to eat first, but April is kind of a "no chill" cat as in, she's a bit heavy footed and laser focused on the task at hand, she's clumsy and barges through us or Annie no matter what whereas Annie is more "considerate". But also, there's been times where Annie will finish her meal first and stick her head in April's bowl even when April is still eating (this is a behavior I've been trying to stop, it's recent and Annie is pretty defiant) and April will either just keep eating or more often than not, will leave and let Annie finish her food for her.

Another behavior my husband said happens between the dominant and non-dominant cat is that if the non-dominant cat is lying/sleeping somewhere, and the dominant one comes in to take their spot, they'll move. April is usually the one to approach Annie and Annie will leave but this is very often accompanied by April nipping at Annie to get her to move rather than just her mere presence, and I try to stop it when I can.

Like I said, I'm not really concerned or worried about this dynamic, I'm just more curious and confused as it seems like they both show some kind of dominant behavior to one another. Are they "sharing" the spot of being sort of dominant?

 

[maggie101]

When it comes to food peaches will not share with anyone. She can also be rude snatching a piece of food,running off,and growling. Maggie sleeps where she wants to sleep so she will but them out of the way. If eating and Peaches wants her food she will leave. If peaches is sleeping on my bed and Maggie gets on she will growl. So it's more like getting what they want

 

[susanm9006]

In my experience dominance isn’t the same in cats as it is in dogs. As you have noticed, not so clear cut. I think in cats it is more of them working out a relationship and agreement on who does what and how they feel about one another. One cat grooming and the other one refusing can be sign that they tolerate one another but aren’t actually friends.

 

[maggie101]

I've also realized that when they were teens and young adult I thought Peaches was clearly the dominant one over everything. Now that they are senior Peaches is more mellow

 

[Kat0121]

In my experience dominance isn’t the same in cats as it is in dogs. As you have noticed, not so clear cut. I think in cats it is more of them working out a relationship and agreement on who does what and how they feel about one another. One cat grooming and the other one refusing can be sign that they tolerate one another but aren’t actually friends.

I agree with this. The dynamic can change though. When I first got the girls Lilith was the boss. Even our dog knew that and respected her position. Lily was boss and Sophie was her second in command. Sophie was rather timid and submissive to her sister at first. Then she became more comfortable and her personality really came out. She started challenging her sister and now they are much closer to being equals. They have an interesting relationship. They are neither rivals nor friends. They do enjoy a game of chasey chase from time to time and will occasionally have a wrestling match but they have never hurt each other. I have never seen them grooming each other and they don't snuggle but they do respect one another and I think both would really feel the loss if the other was gone. They have been together all of their lives.

The closest thing I have witnessed to any affection between them was when Sophie was playing with a toy that was connected to the big cat tree by an elastic cord. Somehow the cord got wrapped around her foot and she couldn't get it loose. She got upset and Lily went over to check out what was going on. Lily arched her back and started to hiss. Not at her sister but at the offending cord. I ran over and cut the cord. Sophie went and hid behind the TV and Lilith went and sat beside her until she decided to come out. Her foot was fine. Soon after I was being scolded because the toy was gone.

One way that Lilith has maintained a little bit of dominance is that she assigned her sister to wake up duty and Sophie does her job very well. There is nothing subtle about her. She will stand on me and shriek in my ear like a little banshee. I know Lilith finds this amusing. She is far more subtle than her sister in the way that she gets me to do what she wants. She will run into my room and start whining to get me to go in there to see what is wrong. When I do, she will hop up onto the bed because she wants to cuddle. It doesn't matter what time it is or what I am doing.

 

[NekoM]

Dominance isn’t always straightforward with Cats. I have two male cats, a one year old and a ten year old. The one year old gets to the food first, pushes the ten year old out of the way, steals his sleeping spot and continuously jumps all over him. All of that sounds like dominant behavior, but there are times when he starts up, jumping on the ten year old who just looks at him and the one year old immediately backs down and hides. Non violent dominance is a really weird thing because sometimes the one who looks like their in charge are just being allowed to be in charge.

 

[maggie101]

Of course my old cat Josie would break up fights between Maggie and Peaches. She was their mentor.Eventually it becomes time to clicker
train

 

[Alldara]

I think the conversation about dominance is viewing cats through a dog lens (and not an accurate dog lens).

Who will appear to be the most "dominant" in the situation is more about who is most confident and the unconfident cat's reaction to the situation.

For example many food insecure cats will be bullies about food. They will eat first. This is not dominance. Two food secure cats are happy to wait or eat together. Sometimes rather than go to a different bowl, I've observed my cats wait in a line for specific food. This was after building Cal's food security (born indoors in a great foster home, ate together with siblings and all would push and trade food frequently).

Pinning and nipping is about communication. It can be anything from overstimulation, to "hey play with me", to "I've had enough", to "I don't like you/that".

Much of a cat's interaction with other beings, including other cats is about likes and dislikes.

Co-grooming is about the ability and willingness of both cats to learn how the other likes to be groomed without overstimulating the other cat.

Cuddling can be partially based on climate, temperature and how each cat likes to be touched.

Ex1. Magnus never liked being groomed by Nobel because Nobel grooms the top of the head and Magnus can be quite sensitive about his ears. He's much happier being groomed by Cal, who starts by grooming his neck. Magnus would groom both cats.

Ex. 2 Nobel would never eat wet food while other cats eat it, as he doesn't like the sound of other cats eating wet food. He was happy to accept treats in the same space and even share directly from my hand.

 

[BeccaT]

This has been very insightful, I really appreciate everyone's responses! I'm somewhat happy to hear it's not all just about dominance with cats and that my cat's behavior may not be dominance based completely.

I do believe my two tolerate each other more than they are friends, but I also firmly believe one would be lost without the other after seeing how they act whenever one is trapped in a cupboard or we've had to separate them in different rooms for whatever reason. Annie has spent most of her life with April than without her at this point (we'll have had April a year in April, hence the name) and I believe there's still room for them to adjust to each other and become closer friends. I do still get worried about them when they play fight because it can get a bit rough, but not to the point of bleeding thankfully. I have caught April grooming Annie on a few occasions, but it's VERY rare. Annie usually only grooms April when they're conveniently near each other, rather than seeking her out to groom her. They seem to have no issues sharing food or eating next to each other which was a major thing to me, mostly because I was worried April may have had some kind of thing with food as she was previously in a foster home with several other cats and dogs.

I think they have come to some sort of a mutual agreement when it comes to certain things rather than it being dominance based, after reading what everyone has said. Although I do get the impression that Annie is still kind of mad at us for bringing April into the home.

 

[Julesbiscuits]

My two boys (Julian and Misfit) had an interesting dynamic. Julian basically let Misfit take the fall for everything. Wanna wake up mom for food? Here Misfit, you wake her up. Hmm can we get to the kibble in the closet? Julian will open the door and act as if Misfit did it. I only found out it was Jules because I caught him once. Jules ran the show. But it never looked that way, to outsiders Misfit was always in charge.

Misfit used to follow him EVERYWHERE like the most annoying little shadow (the day he figured out how to get on top of the cupboards in the kitchen I could see Jules' soul leave his body ) Sadly when Jules got sick Misfit was very confused; we all thought Jules was just calming down with age like cats do, but really he was very ill and ended up passing away at 4 from undiagnosed PKD-1. Misfit was pretty gentle with him but it broke my heart to see him try to initiate play to no avail. We miss him greatly