Is it wrong to want another?

[flmickey90]

I had posted about a month ago about my kitty Shadow getting away from me and going missing.  I still have not been able to find her, but have been told by neighbors that she's been seen.  I've been looking to no avail.  But my question is that even though I'm still missing and wanting my furbaby to come home in wanting to get another one so soon and not waiting longer?  I feel that I'm letting her down in not waiting to see if she is found, especially knowing how she is.  She would always watch cats closely and would always paw at the window as saying "get away from my territory" type of deal if they got to close to the window.  I had looked at some rescue kind of places as well as shelters online looking and I had contacted one place about one and I was approved and this coming week sometime I'll be getting her for a trial week and going from there after to adopting her.  I know that it may sound selfish and wanting to try and filling that void of her being gone and am sure that we (my mom and I would compare) and know that would be normal, but had talked about waiting longer in doing it.  Is it normal to feel that way?  I have heard of other's that may have done it, but also have waited longer as well.  Are we wrong for jumping the gun to wanting another so soon not knowing if we'll find her and that she would return home?

This is one that we will be getting sometime this week.

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• flmickey90
• Jun 13, 2015

The next two are of our missing furbaby, Shadow.

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• flmickey90
• Oct 11, 2014

Shadow 14.jpg

• flmickey90
• Oct 11, 2014

 

[margd]

Francine looks like a real sweetheart and deserves a home. I don't think you are wrong for wanting to fill that void at all. Anyway Shadow still might come home and be willing to be friends with Francine after a careful introduction. You don't have to give up hope for Shadow.

 

[flmickey90]

That's what we're hoping for in happening as well.  We haven't given up on her, but know should have probably waited a bit longer, but with her being gone, it's hit us hard and we've felt real lost, stressed more as well as grumpy and short tempered at times.  Know sometimes that making decisions like this aren't always the greatest things to do, but we also think that we're helping another life being saved.  We've always wanted to adopt one, especially an older one (maybe the same age as Francine and older).  Shadow was about that age when we got her from an elderly lady a few years ago.  Those ages are always the ones that are looked over way to many times.

 

[margd]

I totally get this. After my Milo died, I only waited three days before I adopted 8 year old Polly. I missed him so much, the only way I could cope was to feel I was saving the life of an older cat with reduced chances of being adopted. It was absolutely the right thing to do. It's different since Milo had actually passed away but I still felt that void and need to save another life. I really hope Shadow comes home for a truly happy ending!

 

[Kat0121]

 
That's what we're hoping for in happening as well.  We haven't given up on her, but know should have probably waited a bit longer, but with her being gone, it's hit us hard and we've felt real lost, stressed more as well as grumpy and short tempered at times.  Know sometimes that making decisions like this aren't always the greatest things to do, but we also think that we're helping another life being saved.  We've always wanted to adopt one, especially an older one (maybe the same age as Francine and older).  Shadow was about that age when we got her from an elderly lady a few years ago.  Those ages are always the ones that are looked over way to many times.

I agree with @Margd. If your heart is telling you that you should adopt Francine, go for it. Hopefully, Shadow will come home very soon and the 2 of them will become good friends. I recently adopted an 8 year old kitty from a local shelter and he gets along great with my 2 female cats ( both age 2) and my 13 year old border collie adores him.

Vibes out that Shadow comes home soon and is healthy

 

[Norachan]

I don't think adopting a new cat is giving up on Shadow in any way. I think it will be a great comfort to you to have another cat in your home and of course it would be wonderful if that sweet Francine found a new home. I'm sure the two girls will become good friends when Shadow comes back home again.

 

[flmickey90]

I totally get this. After my Milo died, I only waited three days before I adopted 8 year old Polly. I missed him so much, the only way I could cope was to feel I was saving the life of an older cat with reduced chances of being adopted. It was absolutely the right thing to do. It's different since Milo had actually passed away but I still felt that void and need to save another life. I really hope Shadow comes home for a truly happy ending!

Thanks.  I've never had to deal with a pet going missing so that part is something all new to me.  Shadow was the first pet I had since 1988 and those pets I had then I lived in the country so we had always had the idea that if they didn't show up, that they had passed or had issues with the busy road that we lived by.  In a way, I dealt with it a bit easier, if that makes sense, but it's always hard to loose a pet no matter how it happens.  

 
I agree with @Margd. If your heart is telling you that you should adopt Francine, go for it. Hopefully, Shadow will come home very soon and the 2 of them will become good friends. I recently adopted an 8 year old kitty from a local shelter and he gets along great with my 2 female cats ( both age 2) and my 13 year old border collie adores him.

Vibes out that Shadow comes home soon and is healthy

I think that's exactly how we're feeling is that knowing that there's so many out there that needs homes knowing before that we could never have pets until now as I had mentioned in my response to Margd on  how long it had been since having one.  So I think with Shadow going missing, it's hit us hard since it's been so long that we had a furbaby in the home.  That's what we're wanting and hoping for her to know that she can be buddies with other kitties.  Francine is one that is from animal control that is in a foster home at this time and can't wait to see how it will be!

 
I don't think adopting a new cat is giving up on Shadow in any way. I think it will be a great comfort to you to have another cat in your home and of course it would be wonderful if that sweet Francine found a new home. I'm sure the two girls will become good friends when Shadow comes back home again.

That's what we're trying to tell ourselves, but sometimes it's easier said than done.  I just think of her quite often at night as she would come in and lay with me after a while, so it's still awkward that when I wake up and she's not there.  That's what we're also thinking that even if we may compare and say "hey, shadow did this or that or something similar to what happened."  We feel that even if we might compare, that it will help releave some of that stress, but still keep up the hope for our other baby to come home!  

Thanks you three for putting my mind (and am sure my mom would feel the same way) at a bit more of ease as know that we're doing something good, but that it will never replace how Shadow has made us feel and that we're doing what we can to find Shadow and hoping that she'll be coming home soon!

 

[handsome kitty]

Have you looked for her by the lady's house? Maybe she got confused and went there.

 

[flmickey90]

Have you looked for her by the lady's house? Maybe she got confused and went there.

Yes, have looked in that area and in the tree line thing along the fence line next to that house as well to no luck.  :'(

 

[kitkat428]

Have you found your sweet kitty yet?

 

[flmickey90]

Have you found your sweet kitty yet?

Not yet, unfortunately.  Still missing her like crazy.

 

[blackangel]

I hope you can find Shadow or she comes home. And there is nothing wrong with adopting another little one. Worst case you have 2 kitties instead of 1.

 

[flmickey90]

Adoption is complete! Was a week this pat Sunday! She is doing welland am trying to find better food for her. Got her ivet from vet, but want something better. Same with moist. They fed her fancy feast moist and diamond dry. So I almost finished the bag, and trying to find a moist she likes. Tried 4health and she'll eat some but won't finish.

 

[kitkat428]

I'm sorry your kitty hasn't came home. I hope you can find a new food for you new kitty.

 

[blackangel]

Hadn't noticed how old this post was! LoL! Anyway, glad the new kitty is doing so well. Good luck looking finding a good food. I've been feeding Frost 9Lives because I had it here already feeding some feral kitties that have moved on. I know it's not the best wet food and He'll eat SOME of it, but leaves a lot behind. I've been feeding him Iams dry food. He likes it, but he still doesn't "tear it up".

 

[flmickey90]

She didn't completely stop eating her dry kibble, but she didn't seem to want to eat much of it yesterday, but she's eaten some today.  She didn't eat to much of the moist this morning when my mom fed her after I had left to go babysitting.   I just fed her and she ate a good portion of the moist and added a bit more water and put it by the fresh water and more of the kibble.  When she didn't seem to want to eat, she seemed fine and was still active and didn't seem lethargic or anything and still would drink water.  I've thought about doing Iams or even the Science Diet kind.  I was hoping that she'd like the 4Health as when I fed that to my kitty that is missing, her fur seemed to start looking better and was more shiny.  I know all cats are different so maybe she just doesn't like it like Shadow did.  I haven't tried the dry food 4Health yet as still have about half a bag or so from when I got some at the vet when I took her in.  Does anyone know much about the iVet dry food?  That's the kind I got and was one of the three that the vet recommended (which the other two was Iams and Science Diet).  I hadn't heard of that kind before until this visit.

 

[Norachan]

Congratulations on adopting a new cat!

Did you go for the long haired black kitty? We need to see some pictures of her!

 

[flmickey90]

One of her favorite spots

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• flmickey90
• Jul 24, 2015

One of my favorite ones so far.

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• flmickey90
• Jun 22, 2015

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• flmickey90
• Jun 22, 2015

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• flmickey90
• Jun 22, 2015

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• flmickey90
• Jul 24, 2015

The other cat I had that went missing did this kind of thing as well.

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• flmickey90
• Jul 24, 2015

 

[kitkat428]

She's beautiful!

 

[margd]

She has very unusual coloring with the reddish brown over the black.  I had a black cat once whose coat showed up red highlights in the sun but I've never seen one like Francine before.  She's really beautiful.