Is a second cat a good idea? Please help :)

[Marije]

Hi Everyone,
I'm seeking advise about getting a second cat. Currently, we are very happy with Marvin. We got him from a shelter about 9 months ago. He's a 4-year-old desexed male. He was very shy and anxious at first, but now he is very much at home. However, I watch him a lot and he looks very bored sometimes. He doesn't like toys, he's usually afraid of toys. When something changes in the house or when there are visitors he is anxious and seems so uncomfortable with himself ( as in insecure). Sometimes he miauws in the night and I just feel like he's missing something.

I was thinking to get another kitten that can accompany him, possibly give him some confidence, and even play with him.
The cat shelter gave me a booklet with his characteristics and history, which says that he doesn't mind living with other cats. But it also says that he likes cuddling which is not quite true.

The last thing I want is to make him more anxious..

Is there anyone that can give me some advice or is experienced with this situation?

Thank you very much!

 

[adventuregirl]

Many animal shelters have foster programs. My local humane society needs people to foster all the time. Sometimes it’s a cat that needs more socializing or young kittens, but oftentimes it’s because they dont have enough room for all the cats. This might be a good way to help a cat in need and also see if your guy would benefit from having another cat in the house. Quite often fosters end up adopting because they fit in so well!

 

[vince]

Two cats are actually less fuss than a single one. If your resources are up to it, it might be a good idea to get Marv a buddy.

He'll be a bit more anxious for a little while, but should get used to another cat in a short while. He's about the age that my Sir-Eats-A-lot was when I got Chester as a companion for him. They hit it off right away.

I got Chet because Eats-A-Lot was being a pest, chewing my arm and the like. I figured if he was going to be a pest, he could do that to another cat. It worked out just fine.

As far as night calling goes, it might be that he just wants reassurance that somebody's there. Chester does this, and a "meow" response from me does the job.

 

[ArtNJ]

Four year olds have a pretty good chance of befriending a kitten. However, occassionaly, they take a kitten harder, and you can have a longer, harder introduction where maybe they don't end up friends. Its not super common at this age, and even if being a bit of a nervous cat doesn't help, we can't put odds on it for you, other than to says 4 year olds generaly have a fairly good chance of befriending a kitten after an introduction process.

So I don't think its a bad idea to just ago for it as V vince suggests. Its also not a bad idea to foster as adventuregirl suggests. However, not all foster programs allow you do adopt the first cat you foster. Some don't want to fuss with working with someone that will only help for one cat. So you'd have to find out the details and decide what you want to do.

 

[misty8723]

I think I would not get a kitten but one closer to Marvin's age. When we got a second cat after Swanie passed, we looked for one with a laid back personality who go along with other cats. Cricket, our tortie, is a little high struck and had her tail in a twist at first, not happy at all. The introduction phase probably took about 3 weeks, but once she got to know him, she accepted him and its a lot of fun watching them play. Also, Austin is cuddler and Cricket isnt, so I got a lap cat. Just make sure you do the introduction properly.

 

[vince]

i should have said that Chester and Eats-A-Lot were both adults when I adopted them. I don't know for sure, but I'd guess they both were between 2 and 3 when I got them. Their introduction was extremely short--probably two hours and they were sleeping and playing together.

 

[MonaLyssa33]

When I adopted Remy and Maisie, I went in wanting to adopt Maisie, but they wanted her to go with a cat she knew because she is very skittish and she basically needed a more socialized cat to help her "know how to cat." I think as long as the introduction goes at his pace, getting a buddy for Marvin could help bring him out of his shell a little more and more comfortable.

 

[tarasgirl06]

Hi Everyone,
I'm seeking advise about getting a second cat. Currently, we are very happy with Marvin. We got him from a shelter about 9 months ago. He's a 4-year-old desexed male. He was very shy and anxious at first, but now he is very much at home. However, I watch him a lot and he looks very bored sometimes. He doesn't like toys, he's usually afraid of toys. When something changes in the house or when there are visitors he is anxious and seems so uncomfortable with himself ( as in insecure). Sometimes he miauws in the night and I just feel like he's missing something.

I was thinking to get another kitten that can accompany him, possibly give him some confidence, and even play with him.
The cat shelter gave me a booklet with his characteristics and history, which says that he doesn't mind living with other cats. But it also says that he likes cuddling which is not quite true.

The last thing I want is to make him more anxious..

Is there anyone that can give me some advice or is experienced with this situation?

Thank you very much!

Hello M Marije and Marvin and family, and welcome to TCS! Looks like you've gotten some good input. Many "experts" suggest bringing a new cat into the home, installing him or her in a separate room with everything (s)he needs (food, water, litterbox, toys, climbing and scratching furniture, sleeping place) and gradually letting the two see and sniff one another through a crack in the door, increasing the time and working up to visits between them until, at around 2 weeks, they are able to be together. "CAT DADDY" Jackson Galaxy, host of Animal Planet's "MY CAT FROM HELL" has numerous YouTube videos on cat behavior and multi-cat families. He also has several books, including with co-author Kate Benjamin, owner of hauspanther.com (an excellent site for all kinds of links to cat supplies and more). And there are lots of links here on TCS about cat behavior and introducing a new cat; just click on the "CAT ARTICLES" or site name at the top of the page, and you'll find them.
Fostering is an EXCELLENT idea and almost every ACC, humane society, rescue and sanctuary is in need of more good, loving homes for cats. If you don't know where these are in your area, you can go to animalrescuedirectory.net and choose your state *as long as you're in the US) from the menu, then look at area facilities. You can use your computer's or social network's search engine for the same purpose.
Though it might be tempting to adopt a kitten, adult and mature cats are wonderful, too, and it is often easier to tell what their personalities are like than it would be with kittens. You can look at/ask about their personalities, needs, behaviors, etc. at the shelter. Bear in mind that cats are mammals like we are, highly intelligent and sensitive, and that they will establish their place in the family. This may involve establishing dominance by the alpha cat. As long as they are not harming one another, this is a natural part of joining a family, just as it is in human families. You can ask knowledgeable shelter personnel about this as well.

 

[vansX2]

When I adopted Remy and Maisie, I went in wanting to adopt Maisie, but they wanted her to go with a cat she knew because she is very skittish and she basically needed a more socialized cat to help her "know how to cat." I think as long as the introduction goes at his pace, getting a buddy for Marvin could help bring him out of his shell a little more and more comfortable.

I got my first boy a 10 month old in April 19. He was very shy. Wouldn't even climb the new Cat Tree that I got him. My 2nd boy arrived as a 3 month old. In November '19. With the new kittens arrival. The first cat became more confident and finally began climbing the Cat Tree. They frequently sleep curled up together. It was a good decision adding a playmate.

 

[Marije]

Wauwwww so much good advise. Thank you so much everyone. I’ll go to shelter this weekend and explain my story. Thank you so much!!

 

[tarasgirl06]

Wauwwww so much good advise. Thank you so much everyone. I’ll go to shelter this weekend and explain my story. Thank you so much!!

Please keep us informed, won't you? And we're here to help!

 

[Marije]

I will for sure! I have an appointment this Friday at the shelter. I’ll keep you posted!

 

[shebaa]

I volunteer at the shelter and I've heard its best to adopt a cat in the same age range as you current cat. So if he's 4, maybe 2 -5 years old? Kittens can be very annoying to adult cats

 

[Maria Bayote]

I agree with fostering too. And if adoption I also agree with getting a cat similar or almost similar in age. Not everyone can tolerate a long-lasting energy of a kitten.

As for meowing at night my Graham does this every single night. I just call her name to let her know I am in the house with her. Sometimes she'd hop on the bed and be content on my chest, but sometimes she'd continue to meow until I go to her and carry her to bed.

Goodluck. Keep us informed.

 

[voyager]

It all depends on the personalities of the cats.
I have 2 brothers that have been living together for 5 years.
One is very social, a maker of friends everywhere he goes, almost without fear: neighbors, their pets, and so on.
The other is a 'fraidy cat.
He only tolerates the other because they have lived together all their lives, but still will beat up on the other just for the fun of it, occasionally.
Otherwise, he's terrified of everything not regularly around home.
The social cat could be introduced to a new cat and adapt to it.
The other cat would never, ever accept a new cat addition to our family.

 

[danteshuman]

I was going to add that a lot of it depends on matching the temperaments. So for instance my current cat is hyper easily stressed and well not brave at all. His brother is in that perfect middle of the personality spectrum. That is the kinda cat I think you need and one that isn’t more hyper personality wise than your resident cat. Now my cats is bff with his mojito cat brother & calms down/is less stressed around him. Also nothing calms a stressed cat down faster than their cat Buddy being calm.

If you are up to waking up every 3 hours for a couple of weeks I would foster a litter of kittens and bottle feed them (the get more spaced out as they age.) The kitten lady posts how to videos on YouTube. I will add that cats tend to accept kittens more readily than adult cats. Though I have known a few cats that didn’t want to be around the kittens until they were 4 or 5 months old. However they did accept them (& eventually bond with them.) An older 1 or 2 year old cat will be calmer (& they will know the personality better) but the introduction process will take longer.

Explain to the shelter groups you are looking for a brave cat that loves other cats and isn’t crazy hyper above normal kitten zoomies.