So I've had my current cat, Greta 3 years old female, for about 7 months now and she was originally part of a bonded pair but her sister died in the shelter. She gets really lonely and depressed by herself so I thought it would be a good and healthy idea to get another cat so she can have the social interactions she has been used to. My second cat, Keith 3 years old male, I've had for about 2 weeks now. He's a gentle boy who loves to play. I've been doing the room swapping, and mingling their scents, and having them try and get used to seeing each other but Greta is still very aggressive. She's growling, hissing, and batting at him through the barriers, and he has only retaliated once without hissing or growling of any kind. I have multicat Hormone diffusers and things that are supposed to lessen their stress a little bit. I'm really not sure where I'm going wrong or what else I can do to make this better. Should I just rip the band-aid off and let them mingle?
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Introducing adult cats
- Thread starter Kacox
- Start Date
Hi Kacox and welcome to TCS!
I know two weeks sounds like a long time, but in cat introduction land, it's really not.
If you give up now you probably go back to square one.
It does sound like you have a fair idea of how it all works, but just in case you've missed anything, we have a pretty comprehensive article:
I know two weeks sounds like a long time, but in cat introduction land, it's really not.
If you give up now you probably go back to square one.
It does sound like you have a fair idea of how it all works, but just in case you've missed anything, we have a pretty comprehensive article:
How To Successfully Introduce Cats [The Ultimate Guide] - TheCatSite
Introduce cats seamlessly into your household with our comprehensive guide. Gain insights into cat behavior, discover effective techniques, and make this journey as smooth as possible for your beloved pets.
thecatsite.com
You know that thing therapists do to help humans get over phobias, gradual desensitization? Like first they show you a film of a spider, then they put one in a cage twelve feet away, and it gets more challenging as the therapy progresses.
Here is my point: the therapist wants the human seriously stressed at each new stage, b/c that is how they know the stage is doing work. They don't want the human throwing up or curled in a ball, but they want the human stressed at first, so the stage can do work.
Its the same with cat introductions. In fact, I think the process and goals are very similar. So what you have right now is an introduction process that is doing work. That isn't bad. Sometimes its slow. But it doesn't mean there is a problem.
You could give us more details of your process, but it sounds like its doing what its supposed to do, letting the cat get some stress out without anything bad happening, just like with the spider in the cage. There is no specific timeline for a human to get over the fear of spiders, and there is no specific timeline for cat introductions -- the therapist (i.e. you) monitors and adjusts based on how its going. Sometimes you might need to linger on a particular stage.
Here is my point: the therapist wants the human seriously stressed at each new stage, b/c that is how they know the stage is doing work. They don't want the human throwing up or curled in a ball, but they want the human stressed at first, so the stage can do work.
Its the same with cat introductions. In fact, I think the process and goals are very similar. So what you have right now is an introduction process that is doing work. That isn't bad. Sometimes its slow. But it doesn't mean there is a problem.
You could give us more details of your process, but it sounds like its doing what its supposed to do, letting the cat get some stress out without anything bad happening, just like with the spider in the cage. There is no specific timeline for a human to get over the fear of spiders, and there is no specific timeline for cat introductions -- the therapist (i.e. you) monitors and adjusts based on how its going. Sometimes you might need to linger on a particular stage.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #4
So currently, I have been feeding them on opposite sides of the door and they have no issue with that, and seeing as that has been easy I have been feeding them close with the door slightly cracked so they can see each other, and at most Greta growls because Keith is a piggy and finishes his food first. At that point I just shut the door and let her continue eating.
He is already used to us and the house, and they seem to be comfortable with each others' scents for the most part. They use each other's litter boxes interchangeably, without any accidents (so far
).
The couple times that I have given them a little more barred face to face time Keith is interested in the positive distractions, and hell eat his treats and play. Greta in the other hand is not very interested in anything, not her favorite scratch spots, her favorite toys, or her favorite food/treats, during these distant visual meetings.
I have seen an improvement from week 1 to week 2, she reluctantly plays a little bit, and eats her treats watchfully, but still growls really aggressive.
He is already used to us and the house, and they seem to be comfortable with each others' scents for the most part. They use each other's litter boxes interchangeably, without any accidents (so far
). The couple times that I have given them a little more barred face to face time Keith is interested in the positive distractions, and hell eat his treats and play. Greta in the other hand is not very interested in anything, not her favorite scratch spots, her favorite toys, or her favorite food/treats, during these distant visual meetings.
I have seen an improvement from week 1 to week 2, she reluctantly plays a little bit, and eats her treats watchfully, but still growls really aggressive.
Oh ok, I see the issue. It takes real time at a particular stage to make progress, so trial face to face meetings tend not to help much. A better step is rigging the house so that they can see each other but not touch. For example, double stacked baby gates (single ones tend to get jumped over).
Note that you might still have some hissing and tension when you do let them interact, but thats ok. As long as they dont want to fight, they can work through a lot of stuff on their own. But here, I do think an intermediate step where they can see each other but not touch would be helpful.
Note that you might still have some hissing and tension when you do let them interact, but thats ok. As long as they dont want to fight, they can work through a lot of stuff on their own. But here, I do think an intermediate step where they can see each other but not touch would be helpful.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #6
Okay I'll keep going with the visual contact with no physical contact. I'm trying to keep it positive.
I have another question though. It seems like Greta doesn't want to play as much since I brought Keith home in general, but I also have her on a little bit of a diet since she started to get a little fat.
It's also important to know that both of them have FIV, so I try and keep them active and fit (I dropped the ball a little with Greta).
Could the diet be the reason why she is having a lack of energy lately? Or could it be the stress? And how do I keep her active and energetic?
I have another question though. It seems like Greta doesn't want to play as much since I brought Keith home in general, but I also have her on a little bit of a diet since she started to get a little fat.
It's also important to know that both of them have FIV, so I try and keep them active and fit (I dropped the ball a little with Greta).
Could the diet be the reason why she is having a lack of energy lately? Or could it be the stress? And how do I keep her active and energetic?
With a new cat in the house that is not trusted by the resident cat, the resident cat will often act like they are on guard duty. When on guard duty, a cat may not want affection or to play -- "I can't be distracted from my sacred duty mom! There is an enemy in the house!" You could try shifting your play session to a room with a closed door.
If your cat is still getting enough calories, activity level should not be affected. A very stressed cat may not eat, which is a sign of a more serious problem, but it doesn't sound like thats your issue. A very stressed cat might hide a lot, but that would generally only be when they are allowed to mingle.
If your cat is still getting enough calories, activity level should not be affected. A very stressed cat may not eat, which is a sign of a more serious problem, but it doesn't sound like thats your issue. A very stressed cat might hide a lot, but that would generally only be when they are allowed to mingle.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #8
I've heard 24-35 depending mostly on activity level.
You might borrow or find a cheap wire dog kennel on those buy and sell sites on Facebook. Those work very well for introductions. Swap the cat out so they each get turns. Growling, hissing, swatting are all perfectly normal. As long as there isn't blood drawn everything is OK. Females are not known to be friendly to other cats, but in time they will form a family unit.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #11
So weird update.
They broke through the barrier today and were just chilling peacefully in the same room for who knows how long. My female only started to get aggressive after we noticed and started to give her attention.
Is it possible that she is territorial over me and not the space itself?
They broke through the barrier today and were just chilling peacefully in the same room for who knows how long. My female only started to get aggressive after we noticed and started to give her attention.
Is it possible that she is territorial over me and not the space itself?
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #12
I think it was more that you entering the room heightened any stress she was feeling. She could be protecting you too, she loves you and looks upon you as 'hers'. If they are in the same room, do not approach either one of them to make them nervous and force them into an interaction. Just chill and watch. Keep a large stiff piece of cardboard handy to stick between them if they do start fighting. This is a good sign! Don't worry about getting them to play or even move around more, they are both on high alert, and slow and steady is what it will take now.
Could be you basically just woke them up. There is a phase where they can be in the same room but there will be hissing if one gets too close or too active. They can almost always work though that on their own, unless one pushes too far too fast.
I'd say the escape showed that you are further along than you thought, and either now or at some point soon they can be released to finish the process on their own, with supervision during the first hours.
So happy news.
I'd say the escape showed that you are further along than you thought, and either now or at some point soon they can be released to finish the process on their own, with supervision during the first hours.
So happy news.
- Thread Starter Thread Starter
- #15
Could be. On the back is the universal cat defensive position -- paws ready to rake and shred an enemy -- and cats practice it all the time in play. Its rather scary looking when an adult does this to a kitten! But fortunately, they know the difference between play and for real, and they don't hurt the playmate. Although they may sometimes make the playmate fairly uncomfortable, particularly with a size difference!
