Integrating Kittens

[Hayley21]

Hi everyone,

I’m new to this forum and would be extremely grateful for any advice that you can give in relation to integrating kittens of different ages.

I have two resident kittens - Cookie, who is 10 months and Oreo, who has just turned one year old. They are closely bonded and are pretty much inseparable! However, a week ago, we brought home our new baby, a 15 week old kitten called Willow.

We’ve done everything by the book so far in terms of introducing them and started off with keeping her completely separated in our spare room, which we’ve designated as her ‘safe room’. We fed them on either side of the door, then we did the scent and site swapping for 3 days, before we allowed them to see each other for the first time through a gap in the door. When we finally allowed them to meet, there was a bit of hissing on Oreo and Cookie’s part when they first clapped eyes on Willow, but since then, Oreo seems extremely keen to play with her, although Cookie seems a bit more hesitant. Willow, on the other hand, seems absolutely petrified of them both and just hisses and growls every time one of them comes near. In the last day, she has become more confident to play near them and will walk past them when they’re lying down, but she still hisses a lot and growls whenever they try to sniff or greet her.

So, my question is: Am I doing the right thing by letting them mix at this point? They have eaten their meals near to each other and seem calm when distracted by food, but Willow is still very nervous whenever the other two get close to her. There haven’t been any real signs of aggression between the two older kittens and Willow, i.e. no biting, paw swiping or stalking, but I’m worried that it’s putting a lot of stress on them all (Willow especially). I have given them some ‘time out’ on occasions when Oreo or Cookie get a little bit too boisterous, but I don’t know if it’s too soon to let them work things out and mix together for the day, albeit under my constant supervision? Do all the signs I’ve mentioned suggest that they will get on eventually?

Again, I’d be eternally grateful if anyone has the time to respond, even if it’s just to put my mind at rest by providing me with some examples of successful integration!

Thanks so much,

Hayley

Pictures attached for added cuteness - Oreo is the B&W tuxedo, Cookie is the Torbie Ragdoll x Norwegian Forest and Willow is an silver and white long-haired American Curl.

 

[ArtNJ]

Kittens plus one year olds is almost always totally fine in the end, and doesn't really require any supervision -- nothing but time, really. All cats are different, so it doesn't hurt to watch, but the safe money says they will be friends soon. You can safely ignore a little bit of hissing. You'll probably be back in a couple of days to ask about rough play between one year olds and a kitten!

 

[Hayley21]

Kittens plus one year olds is almost always totally fine in the end, and doesn't really require any supervision -- nothing but time, really. All cats are different, so it doesn't hurt to watch, but the safe money says they will be friends soon. You can safely ignore a little bit of hissing.

Thank you so much for your reply, I really appreciate it! Do you think that I’m doing everything right so far, or do you think I should go back a step in the hope that Willow is more comfortable with Oreo and Cookie after some time apart? I’m so worried that she’s getting too stressed out by sharing space with them, even if Oreo and Cookie haven’t physically threatened her.

Thanks so much again! Xx

 

[She's a witch]

in my opinion you're doing what you're supposed to be doing, all is fine! Female cats like to hiss around more than male so I wouldn't really worry about it. I doubt she is really stressed, just slightly frightened but it will pass in few days. I'd certainly relax if I were you and observe their getting to know each other. Remember than if you're stressed about her being stressed, she can pick it up and become stressed for real

One thing I'd probably do to help her feel safer is I'd set up few small boxes in the common areas where she could hide but not be followed by other cats, in case she needs that.

And now you made me want to eat Oreo cookie.

 

[cuppa]

Willow might be having a little harder time acclimating since she is also getting used to a new environment, people, and siblings. If she's just growling and hissing, I think she's doing a good job so far. So long as she isn't trying to fight the other cats (especially to the point of drawing blood), it's just her way of trying to set boundaries with them.

I agree with She's a witch in setting up some small boxes. If you can set up a safe space for her to retreat to where the other cats won't get to her, it might help her feel a little better. Just make sure all cats (especially Willow) are eating, drinking, and using the litter box without issue.

 

[Hayley21]

in my opinion you're doing what you're supposed to be doing, all is fine! Female cats like to hiss around more than male so I wouldn't really worry about it. I doubt she is really stressed, just slightly frightened but it will pass in few days. I'd certainly relax if I were you and observe their getting to know each other. Remember than if you're stressed about her being stressed, she can pick it up and become stressed for real

One thing I'd probably do to help her feel safer is I'd set up few small boxes in the common areas where she could hide but not be followed by other cats, in case she needs that.

And now you made me want to eat Oreo cookie.

Thank you so much for your reply, that’s such a relief to hear! I’m so glad you think that I’m doing okay and that they should be alright after a bit more time, all I want is for them to be a happy threesome! I’m going to keep being patient with them and make sure I don’t let my anxiety come across to them, even if I feel like an overprotective mummy most of the time!

Thanks for your advice about the boxes, I’ve already put some in our living room and we have an assortment of beds and cat trees, but I might put something in our hallway where they like to play. I’m feeling lots more positive now after reading your reply, so I’ll be more optimistic from now on!

Thanks again and no, you can’t eat Oreo and Cookie, they’re mine! Xx

 

[Hayley21]

Willow might be having a little harder time acclimating since she is also getting used to a new environment, people, and siblings. If she's just growling and hissing, I think she's doing a good job so far. So long as she isn't trying to fight the other cats (especially to the point of drawing blood), it's just her way of trying to set boundaries with them.

I agree with She's a witch in setting up some small boxes. If you can set up a safe space for her to retreat to where the other cats won't get to her, it might help her feel a little better. Just make sure all cats (especially Willow) are eating, drinking, and using the litter box without issue.

That’s great, thanks so much for your reply! I’m so glad that you agree I’m doing okay by the sounds of things, that’s all I wanted to hear. I’m just so keen to make sure all three of my babies are happy, they mean the absolute world to me

As you’ve suggested, I’ll add some more hiding places for Willow to escape to if she needs it. They are all eating, drinking and using the litter boxes okay at the moment, so again, I really hope this is another sign that we’re on the way to having a happy, harmonious home.

Thanks so much again, it really does mean a lot xxx

 

[ArtNJ]

Yes, like everyone said, your doing fine. And what your attempting (kitten + 2 one year olds) is very much easy mode. The only scenario that is easier is introducing two super young kittens. Hard mode is introducing a kitten to a senior cat that hasn't met a new cat in years, and sometimes it feels like introducing an active adult (say a one year old) to an inactive senior cat is impossible mode (although it usually is manageable).

 

[Hayley21]

Okay, that’s a huge relief, thanks so much again for replying! I think my concern was that when I introduced Oreo and Cookie, it was a whole lot easier! I guess that was because they are a lot closer in age and Oreo was younger too, so they were a better fit to begin with. I have a feeling Willow is going to be feisty when she grows up, so I hope she’ll be able to hold her own with the terrible twosome before too long!

Thanks so much again for taking the time to respond to me, I really appreciate it xx

 

[duncanmac]

I did almost the exact same thing but the resident boys were about 1.5 years old. It was almost too easy especially since it took about 3 months to get the boys together.

A little hissing from my boys and the kitten for a few days and then everything settled in pretty quickly. I did supervised visits for a week or two, then overnights, and then let them together all day. And, especially with a kitten, treats really help.

 

[Hayley21]

I did almost the exact same thing but the resident boys were about 1.5 years old. It was almost too easy especially since it took about 3 months to get the boys together.

A little hissing from my boys and the kitten for a few days and then everything settled in pretty quickly. I did supervised visits for a week or two, then overnights, and then let them together all day. And, especially with a kitten, treats really help.

Hi there, thanks so much for your reply! It sounds like we’ve been through the same thing and it’s really good to know that it all worked out for you!

Just a quick question, did your resident boys sit/lie down a little way away from the kitten and just stare at them? Mine seem to be doing this a lot and I know it sounds a bit OTT on my part, but I’m worried that they’re playing mind games with Willow and they’re trying to intimidate her with a staring competition! Oreo thumps and twitches her tail a little bit while she’s staring, but she’s in a relaxed position and doesn’t look like she’s going to attack. Her ears are forward and there’s no hissing, but her pupils look dilated. Cookie does the same, but she hangs further back and just stares along with Oreo! Do you think that’s normal and they are just intrigued by her, or could it be a sign that they’re trying to show Willow who’s boss?

Thanks so much again for your help, I really appreciate it! xx

 

[ArtNJ]

Sounds like a precursor to play is all. Earlier in the chain I mentioned you would be coming back to ask us about rough play, and it wouldn't surprise me if that is later today! We will be happy to answer those questions too -- we get them a lot, since it can be a bit disconcerting watching a grown cat play rough with a kitten if you haven't seen it before.

 

[Hayley21]

Phew, that sounds okay then, thank you!! Willow is still hissing at them today and she’s not looking all that keen on playing, but the Oreo and Cookie definitely seem more at ease. They’re all asleep in the same room now, each on a different perch, so they are obviously happy to relax near to each other.

I’m so grateful for the advice I’ve been given by everyone who has replied, I actually slept a lot more soundly last night after being such a nervous wreck the last few nights! If they do start to play together (which I’m hoping they will tonight) and it gets a bit rough, I’ll get back in touch!

Thanks so much again, much love to you and your furbabies xx

 

[duncanmac]

Just a quick question, did your resident boys sit/lie down a little way away from the kitten and just stare at them? Mine seem to be doing this a lot and I know it sounds a bit OTT on my part, but I’m worried that they’re playing mind games with Willow and they’re trying to intimidate her with a staring competition!

TBH, I really didn't notice. The resident cats have very different personalities. Barry was feral but is very much a cat's cat. Loves Duncan and now Paisley. Duncan was first on the scene and is "the mayor" and a bit of a bully. Duncan was more "vigilant" of Paisley and Barry just hung back and watched. I picked Paisley partly because she was very forward - pushy - and very loving. She never had a problem playing, wrestling or interacting with the boys who are twice her size. (She's tiny - 8 pounds and the boys are around 16 - and I don't think she's going to get much bigger.)

Mind games: Probably not; they probably are trying to pick a place for Willow in the hierarchy. The best description of the boys' initial reaction to Paisley was confused. They didn't know what to do, so they mostly did nothing.

 

[Hayley21]

TBH, I really didn't notice. The resident cats have very different personalities. Barry was feral but is very much a cat's cat. Loves Duncan and now Paisley. Duncan was first on the scene and is "the mayor" and a bit of a bully. Duncan was more "vigilant" of Paisley and Barry just hung back and watched. I picked Paisley partly because she was very forward - pushy - and very loving. She never had a problem playing, wrestling or interacting with the boys who are twice her size. (She's tiny - 8 pounds and the boys are around 16 - and I don't think she's going to get much bigger.)

Mind games: Probably not; they probably are trying to pick a place for Willow in the hierarchy. The best description of the boys' initial reaction to Paisley was confused. They didn't know what to do, so they mostly did nothing.

Okay, that’s good to know, your boys sound lovely and Paisley definitely sounds like she can hold her own with them, which I’m very pleased to hear! I also chose Willow for a similar reason, as she came across as pretty chilled, loving and playful when I first met her. I just hope that she soon learns to accept that Oreo and Cookie are not her enemies, they only want to suss her out! I’m guessing they are just intrigued and don’t really know what to make of the fluffy little imposter that has turned up on their turf!

Thanks so much again for your advice, sending lots of love to you, Duncan, Barry and Paisley xx

 

[Hayley21]

Hi everyone!

Firstly, I just wanted to update you all and let you know that things have improved a little bit between Oreo, Cookie and Willow. Although they still aren’t firm friends just yet, we have made some progress. Willow is hissing less at them and while she still growls when they get close, Oreo and Cookie seem a bit less bothered by this now. They clearly still want to play with her, but she’s being stubborn and won’t let them get anywhere near without making her feelings known! Last night was the first night we let them mingle while we slept and although there were a few hissy moments, we didn’t wake up to any bloodshed, which was a huge relief!

Anyway, I have another question for those of you who are kind enough to reply... I have to go back to work on Monday and I was wondering if I should separate Willow from Oreo and Cookie while I’m gone? I can put her in her ‘safe room’ with all her toys, food/water and litter box, but I don’t know if that will undo the hard work I’ve already done in intergrating them? I’d also prefer it if she has company, rather than leaving her alone. However, I’ll probably be a nervous wreck while I’m at work if I do let them stay together, worrying that they’re getting up to mischief while I’m not there to supervise and Willow might come to harm!

If you have the time to respond, I’d be super grateful for your advice and thank you so much again for all the help you’ve given me so far!

All my best,

Hayley xx

 

[ArtNJ]

Its so cute when a teenie tiny kitten is all growly! Don't worry, its not super common, but its not rare either, some kittens just start scared of a new situation. As long as the kitten is eating and using the litterbox, rather than hiding under the bed 24/7, its not such a big deal, it will resolve itself. Usually doesn't take more than a week. I think you can let them mingle and get over this. One year olds won't hurt a true kitten that is still tiny - biological hard wiring.

 

[Hayley21]

Okay, thank you so much for replying! Yes, it is cute, but I had hoped that we’d be further along by now, as it has been about a week since we introduced them. Willow is definitely getting more confident and she’s playing a lot by herself, I just wish she could tell that Oreo and Cookie will be great playmates if she only gave them a chance! Fingers crossed it’ll just take a few more days and they’ll be alright by Monday.

Thanks so much again for your help, I really appreciate it! Xx

 

[ArtNJ]

Well, I've never heard of a kitten that stayed hostile to bigger cats long term, so I wouldn't worry too much. Now if we were talking about a 10 year old growling at the one year olds, that is a lot trickier, that can take forever to get better. But kittens are too adaptable, it should be fine.

 

[Hayley21]

Well, I've never heard of a kitten that stayed hostile to bigger cats long term, so I wouldn't worry too much. Now if we were talking about a 10 year old growling at the one year olds, that is a lot trickier, that can take forever to get better. But kittens are too adaptable, it should be fine.

Phew, that’s good to know! Willow does seem like she’s taking more of an interest in them now, as she looks like she wants to join in when I’m playing with Oreo and Cookie, but she’s still too much of a scaredy-cat to take the plunge! I know I’ve just got to stay patient and let her work things out in her own time, so I’ll keep your kind advice in mind!

Thanks again, it really is such a huge relief to hear from people with experience in these things!

All my best,

Hayley xx