Inherited Parents' Cat Is Extremely Aggressive - What To Do?

[LittleHaunt]

Hi everyone.

Both of my parents recently passed away, so today I inherited their 8-year-old cat, Oskar. He started out as a feral cat. My father rescued him when he was 3 weeks old and has had him ever since, and he was very attached to both of my parents. He didn’t hate visitors, but he was never thrilled and usually hid under the bed if anyone was over. They had another cat at the time who he was also very close to, but that cat is unfortunately gone now. Since then he’s been considerably more stand-offish, but overall he’s always been pretty chill and complacent, just off doing his own thing.

Today, however, it’s like a light switch flipped. Oskar is currently in my bathroom in the box we brought him home in, which he has not moved from once in the last eight hours. He has not stopped growling, hisses and spits if anything comes close, and we effectively cannot use the bathroom anymore unless we can strategically close the box with a broom or something. He’s gone through a lot of stress, losing both of his humans in less than two months and being moved to a strange new household, but he hasn’t had any water or anything so I’m really concerned. Besides that, he is MASSIVE - at least 20 pounds, terrifying to consider being attacked by - so I really do not want to be on his bad side.

Now, the biggest problem here is that I already have two cats of my own. Very sweet and well behaved, both from the same litter, never had any behavioural problems whatsoever. If not for them rehabilitating this cat would be significantly easier, but as it stands I’m concerned for their safety as well as my own, and if he progresses enough to be able to come out of the bathroom and be around them, I’m worried about what kind of habits they may pick up from him. They have never been aggressive and the last thing I want is for them to see this unbelievably aggressive cat and decide to follow suit. He is far too aggressive to try and rehome him, and I don’t think the humane society would even consider taking him in. He won’t eat, won’t drink, hasn’t slept or stopped growling, and we cannot get anywhere near him. I’ve spent my whole life around a wide assortment of cats and have never seen one so incredibly angry and violent.

What can I do?

 

[danteshuman]

A few thinks. If your dad rescued him at 3 weeks.... he isn't a semi-feral; he is a bottle baby!
Can you lock the other cats up and let him have run of your place?
You said he is 20 pounds ... I'm assuming he isn't a Maine Coon? If not he is probably obese. He needs to see a vet soon to talk about a diet.
Speaking of a vet, if he does not drink for 24 hours take him to the vet ASAP for hydration. While you are there why not ask the vet for a mild sedative and maybe a Prozac trial for him? It would be better than him being stuck in a shelter.
Are any of his things in your house? I would get the unwashed bedspread from his old home/previous owners bed & place it on the floor or in the tub of his bathroom. Feliway couldn't hurt either. I would close the shower curtain 2/3's closed so he can hide. I would also put a cardboard scratcher in the bathroom. Basically anything you can do to help him have his home smell so he feels secure & to spread his scent around your home.

I have had bottle babies before but I socialized them with other people. That poor boy must be beyond terrified! I don't think avoiding eye contact and talking softly to him could hurt.

 

[Maria Bayote]

I am sorry for your loss of your parents. My heartfelt condolences.

Thank you for taking in your folks' cat.

Oskar is going through a tough time now. Imagine all your life you have known only this house and these humans and all of a sudden you have to be relocated someplace else? This is how your parents' cat is probably undergoing right now. He is terrified and confused, and most probably looking for that familiar scent, those familiar faces.

Do you have your parents' old clothes or anything belonging to them? It might calm him a bit if he could at least smell those things.

I also suggest to separate him for a while from your other cats. Do a slow introduction. In this case introduction could be really slow considering the phase Oskar is undergoing right now.

Try to bring him to the vet and tell the doctor everything about Oskar, including his non-drinking which could lead to problems.

Goodluck and I do hope this turns out very well for all of you. Oskar needs you now more than ever. Your love and patience will soon bear fruit.

 

[di and bob]

i'm so sorry for the loss of your parents, it will bring them peace to know you are caring for their little one. Bless you.
Yes, this is normal behavior for ANY cat put through this much trauma. He is scared witless. Cats absolutely hate change and look how much he has gone through. Is there any extra bedroom/utility room/ second bathroom he can be housed in where he would find quiet? He definitely needs to be separated from the other cats and needs a place to hide and gather himself. Just sit several times a day with him and talk softly, leave food/water/treats behind overnight. Most scared cats will come out at night. He must start eating and drinking. What did your folks used to feed him? He may be more used to human treats like shaved deli turkey, tuna or deli fried chicken. You might try it to get him started. Don't let small children around him, they are much too quick in movements and too noisy. These things just take time, I know how impossible it is right now.He is hissing, growling and spitting out of EXTREME fear, so don't try to touch him. eventually he will calm down and maybe even remember you. He is grieving too and his world is turned upside down, please give him time and gentleness, he'll come around, please keep us posted!

 

[Lya]

I’m very sorry for your loss. It’s very sweet of you to care for him.

So I assume there isn’t a room other than the bathroom where you can keep him? Maybe a room you use less often.

I’ve heard cat’s get nervous when they can’t see what’s up, so it’s a good idea to get a large dog crate and put him with his carrier or a cave-style cat bed. Inside the crate you can put his litter box, and his food and water on a good distance from the box. With him being inside the crate he realizes he can see everything outside but not be touched or attacked by anyone. (A good idea is also cover arond 2/3 of the crate with a blanket, specially the parts where he might be attacked from the back)

Hope it helps, I’ve heard crating is a great way to handle this type of situations. Good luck!

 

[artiemom]

di and bob are so right.. as are the other posters..

Oskar is terrified, upset, cannot understand what happened to him.. He has lost everything, he loved... poor thing.

I will suggest to try these things: Feliway plug ins... Rescue Remedy-- or even Jackson Galaxy's products.

You can mist the sprays in the rooms..

I am finding JG's stuff to be helping my anxious, fearful, new kitty.. They area a bit pricey, but I do think it is worth it.

The customer support is great. They can suggest a specific solution or a combo for you.. and they are always having coupons...

Good Luck..

 

[LittleHaunt]

Hello guys. Thanks for the responses.

The place I live is small. There isn't another room he could be in, except for the unfinished basement which I don't feel great about.

He is completely separated from my own cats. He has items that belonged to my parents, I have given him a wide assortment of foods, fresh water, feliway.
He does know me—I lived with him for a large portion of his life. He just never liked anyone except my parents, especially my father.

The problem with medication, softly talking to him, or anything of the sort is that I physically can't get near him. He hasn't moved from his spot is over 24 hours. He is violently assaulting anything around him, including his own blanket and the carrier he is in.

I'm concerned about his water intake the most. I know he needs to go to the vet, which I am planning on doing soon (It's hard—I'm an only child and the executor of both of my parents estates, so I barely have time for me, let alone for Oscar) but how do I even get him there? He broke 2 brooms in his outrage when I tried to use one to scoop his water bowl within 2 feet of where he is.

I have consulted several vets and I am going to give it until Monday before we come up with another plan. It would be nice if I had somewhere to put him other than a bathroom, but I don't. The other thing is that I know if he leaves where he is now—say, I put my own cats away and let him have run of the house—it would be impossible for me to get him back into the bathroom without a bloody battle, which I don't want.

 

[rubysmama]

I don't have anything to add that hasn't already been suggested in regards to Oskar's care, but wanted to post and welcome you to TCS. So sorry, though, about the circumstances that brought you here.

Good luck with Oskar. Right now, he is so stressed and scared. Hopefully in the quiet overnight he'll eat something. Then you can proceed from there.

Please keep us updated on how things are going.

 

[di and bob]

He is crazy with grief and fear. Time is the only thing that will help. Is he eating/drinking at all yet? ANY small step is a step towards him calming down. There are calming 'treats' on Amazon you might try, he might eat treats. Ask your vet first though. I have seen cats lash out like this, and it takes a lot of calm soothing interaction to get them back.

 

[LittleHaunt]

Hello all. Just a bit of an update.

I notice he's lost a large amount of fur. From stress, I suppose.
He's quite an obese cat, and he's somewhat wedged under the bathtub in a way that makes it seem like he may be stuck.. In any case, he still hisses and growls when I enter the bathroom for a quick moment, but he's not staring me down as if he's about to attack now. He even lay his head down and shut his eyes on one occasion, so I hope he's coming around a bit.

Haven't been able to get him to drink anything outright, but by giving him canned salmon (human food) and putting it over the vent (to make it warm and smelly), he'll come out and sneakily eat it when I'm not around. I've also been adding a lot of water to it to try and get him to drink.

Mostly he's still about the same, but I think he's feeling a bit less like he needs to fight to the death. My own cats are also friendly and have taken to playing with their toys right outside of his door, taking bits of their food over there to eat it, and generally being interested in him. I notice that they haven't hissed at each other at all; on the contrary, it seems to put him a bit at ease.

I have still been using feliway, and will continue to. I'll update again if anyone is interested.

Also, thank you for all of the well wishes. It has been a difficult time for me, as I'm only 25. I can't imagine what Oskar must be going through, as he's unable to grasp what any of this means.

 

[di and bob]

Yes, any improvement, no matter how small, means he's coming around. He is just more sensitive than most and feels the fear and uncertainty more. The fact that he is eating is very good, as his ability to close his eyes with you present. The smallness of the place he is in is giving him comfort. I'm sure he is very aware of your other cats behind the door, and that just adds to his anxiety, but he'll come around, it may take a few months, but he's on his way!

 

[rubysmama]

Thanks for the update. And, yes, please keep us posted on his progress.

 

[danteshuman]

I'm sorry for your loss.

I'm glad to hear he is eating. The slow blink works very well. You might try doing it. I would also try sitting in the bathroom, avoiding eye contact and telling him how much you miss your parents.

Bottle babies are the best cats IMO. Sometimes you get lucky and get an adorable kitty that nurses on a binkie. They are extremely bonded to their humans. The biggest difference I have noticed is they follow you around more & look to their humans to solve their problems more often. My mom's bottle baby thought she was human! My point is to hang in there; you may be pleasantly surprised to find you have inherited a remarkable cat. I have a bottle baby kitten that I fostered. He is much more people oriented than most cats.

My best bud recently died. I loved him immensely. Many times I discussed my desire for my mom to adopt him and love him if anything ever happened to me. Your parents entrusted you to care for their beloved pet/fur baby/ most prized possession. So though you are young and grieving, please remember your parents loved Oskar & you very much. Now you can pass on the love you had for your parents to Oskar.

 

[LittleHaunt]

I thought I would give you all an update on Oskar, once again. It has been a week since I brought him home now.

I would say that he's made good progress. Generally he lets me enter the bathroom without any hissing or growling, unless I'm approaching him directly, of course. But things are going all right.

Normally, he rests in the storage bin I moved him over in. When I shower, I put the lid back on and keep him in there, but he's been wanting to burst free lately. I think he may be growing tired of being in the bathroom.
He's never been a terribly ambitious cat, but one of my cats has been outside the door day and night. Never hissing, just keeping him company. She's very interested.

I really liked the dog crate idea, so I ordered one on amazon. It should be here by Wednesday. It's a large one, and I think transferring him to that in the main living area would be a good move, otherwise he's likely never going to get properly introduced to my own cats, which is a large concern. Does anyone have anymore advice for that aspect of things? I certainly don't want a fight to break out through the cage, and as I've never had any kind of litter box issues, I don't want any spraying to begin or whatever. I'm a little worried about it, but I know him living in the bathroom forever isn't an option that either of us want.

Other than that, he's eating well, and I'm continuing to use feliway, as well as homeopet feline d-stress, which seems to work well for him! He will even play with a toy under the door if I wiggle it. And I played with da bird with him—it's odd, my parents told me he never liked to play, but he cannot resist da bird. Who can, I guess. He pauses occasionally to hiss, not at the toy or at me, but just quietly to himself, as if he's disappointed that he's having fun haha.

But yes. I think it's going to be a long haul. I would love to get him to a vet, but until I buy a larger carrier and can get him into something like that, I think he'll have to hang out here. I don't want to destroy any progress we may have made, and I'm certain he doesn't have any diseases that may pass to my cats; he's never been outside, and has been an only cat for many years now.

Thanks again for all of the valuable advice. I'll update again if anyone is interested.

 

[LittleHaunt]

For anyone interested, here is the big guy I'm dealing with.

He joins my two Wedgie littermates, Beastie (He's the orange and white fella, and the smaller of the two) and his sister, Poe.

 

[Hlee]

I am so sorry for your loss.
I inherited my mom's 16 year old kitty when she passed . He is gone now too but my best advice is just to go slow and it will work out.

 

[rubysmama]

I'm glad things are improving with Oskar. He's super handsome. And Beastie and Poe are gorgeous. I hope all 3 cats will eventually be friends.

The dog crate should help him be around your other cats, without them being able to get aggressive. You might want to keep it partially covered at first, so he'll still feel safe and secure.

TCS has some articles on introducing cats, which may have some tips for you. Here are the links:

How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide
Introducing Cats To Cats
The Multi-cat Household

Good luck with the introductions. And, yes, please do keep us up on how things are going.

 

[di and bob]

I think he's doing very well for only a week. Any improvement is good in a week. A kennel is a good idea, he'll get used to the others quicker. Please keep us posted, bless you for taking him in!

 

[danteshuman]

I would try site swapping (from, my cat from hell.) Lock all your other kitties in a room with litter/food/water/toys .... and let him have free reign of your place for half the day. Maybe at night while you are home? (I would give him a day or two having full run of the place because he has been locked up so long.) You can try keeping his food in the bathroom so he has to go back in to get food. You can also give him lots of safe places to hide by putting a box on it's side with a towel covering half of the entrance. The crate might work or he might feel more on edge because the other cats can surround him & he is trapped. Plus a bathroom is like us being in a jail cell. It might make him more wound up. I bet he will enjoy exploring while you are sleeping. That way he can own your house to.

I am happy he is doing better. I think he will let you pet him in a few weeks.

 

[Bauer25]

A cat at my work was in the same situation, elderly owner past away, the cat had grown up from 8 weeks to 12 years old as an only cat with the one older lady. The daughter couldn't take her as she was very aggressive towards her and had never been around other cats, and the daughter has cats. She was brought to my work and was untouchable, we had to put her into a dog kennel so there was enough room to be able to put food and water in and out with her far away enough to not attack, even looking at her though the window into her kennel she would hiss. This carried on for a couple months, we had to move her to a smaller kennel as we eventually needed the dog one, gave her a box to hid in. she wasn't touched for months, just feeding and litter box changes, then one day, after at least a couple months of being there, she walked over while someone was changing her bowls, rubbed up to their hand and purred. from then on out she has accepted any stranger, especially loving pats from her regular care takers. She also started off hissing at all and any cat or dog she could see from the kennel. now i haven't heard her hiss at all and we have had cats free walking in the room she's in, they look at each other through the bars and she is totally fine, so signs of stress at all. Give him some time, don't force any kind of pats or human contact and i'm sure he will come around, and even get to be buddies with your cats. Maybe give him a couple more weeks to settle in before you change him from the bathroom to the dog kennel, or put him in the dog kennel and out it in your bedroom and close the door so he isn't bombarded with your other cats while he is trying to settle in. It took the the girl at my work a couple months to actually settle and see significant changes in her so don't get discouraged if he needs longer than you might anticipate