I'm a little peeved

[Winchester]

Really? This is the route you're taking here? Look, I am not trying to start anything here and I guess I probably should have just kept quiet about the whole thing instead of venting about it. Nobody was there but me, the woman in question, and somebody else who's a friend and just happened to walk in during the discussion. Be that as it may, I do not have to stand and listen to anybody curse at me about my lifestyle, no matter what that lifestyle is. And no matter how bad a day this woman may have been having.

And that's all I will say.

 

[AbbysMom]

I don't want to get involved in this debate, but would you have approached Winchester in the manner in which she was approached, using expletives and being so persistent about it? That is the part of this that I have an issue with. Sure she could have health issues but that is no reason to be crude and abrasive and yes, bullying about it. Health issues do not give you a pass on common kindness. Perhaps Winchester shouldn't have made the comment but she is human and was trying to be polite and finally snapped because of the extreme rudeness and I will say it again, bullying nature of this woman. I wasn't in the situation so I don't know how I would have reacted in real life, but it's possible my patience would have run out too. For the record, Winchester is extremely supportive to people in the Weight loss and exercise threads here in the Cat Lounge.

Also for the record about 12 years go I was around 100 pounds overweight. I'm still overweight, but by a smaller number.

 

[peaches08]

I am also overweight, by about 50+ lbs. Have people made comments about me? Sure they have. Did it help that I came from a weight obsessed mother who was extremely abusive? Does that give me the right to verbally abuse someone? No, absolutely not.

Bottom line, Winchester and this lady are not "down like that" and regardless of the subject discussed she was out of line. Period.

 

[natalie_ca]

d she was out of line. Period.

I agree. As I said above, it's one thing to say something like "OMG! I can't believe you are walking in this weather!" vs. her swearing and carrying on the way she did.

I have to apologize. I think it was my second comment in my initial post in this thread, that derailed this thread.  I was by no means justifying the woman's rudeness, but a comment that she apparently made caught my eye that screamed jealousy on the woman's part so I commented on it. It was not meant to justify what the women did, just as an insight as to why she might have done it:

I do not think Winchester was wrong in how she handled it. If things were as she said, she showed great patience in the face of someone who just wouldn't give up and was harassing her. We all have our breaking points.

 

[happybird]

I just want to point out that there is a HUGE difference between pointed, targeted, personal attacks on Facebook (which is localized and people physically know one another), and venting about an anonymous, rude stranger to one's online, and mostly anonymous, forum friends. And I do agree that the former is unacceptable. I highly doubt anyone here would stand by if a personal attack of a memeber or guest were to occur.

Moreover, maybe a member who is free with their comments about someone else's weight or lifestyle will see how upsetting and hurtful it can be to the recipient of those comments and decide to change their ways. And if anyone took offense to my comment, please know that I was joking. I used the (expletive) because it mirrors the original post of the anonymous woman's horrible and offensive language.

 

[natalie_ca]

 
 I probably should have just kept quiet about the whole thing instead of venting about it.

I would have posted about it too, so don't feel bad

 

[goholistic]

I am like so anti-drama, but I just wanted to say one thing. Let's forget this whole exchange was about weight or exercise. It could have been about wearing a lot of make-up (or none) or that she had just won the lottery and spent it to build a feral cat house. It could have been about anything of a personal nature. The tone and delivery was uncouth. And a seemingly lack of respect and intrusion into one's personal life was inappropriate.

If we were to go back in time (keeping the subject of weight and exercise), but change the exchange to be polite, respectful, complimentary, not one of intrusion, but of positive regard, this thread probably wouldn't exist or it would on good terms.

My point is...it's not the topic. It's the people involved, their perspective on life, and the choice to live it positively or negatively.

 

[catsallaround]

I am 275LBS and have been at 305.  Pam was 100% right.  This lady was relentless.  I can not believe you kept your cool as long as you did.

I would personally probably say something like oh your brave to walk today but more to make small talk then to start a fight and curse! 

I truly believe anyone can exercise.  I took care of bedbound patients who did-not in your sense of lifting heavy weights but the light hand weight and just stretching can do wonders.  This lady jsut sounds like she has to be the victim and will never change.

 

[marc999]

Some women can be...catty...n'est pas? 

Sounds like a jealousy comment combined with her already being in a bad mood. 

 

[denice]

Now saying women are catty, given how some women do act, is offensive to all the kitties.  Yes I am a woman and I have been on the receiving end of a lot of  "cattiness"

 

[rosiemac]

Pam you do what you think is good for you.

As for the way that woman spoke to you, she were obviously kicked out of charm school!!