I start my new job on Monday morning. I should be excited, or at the very least nervous! But I'm neither! In fact I feel a sense of dread!
I already miss my old job, and as much as I hated it at times, largely because of having to work short staffed and being completely bagged and 100% exhausted at the end of a shift, I mostly loved it.
I've always loved bedside nursing. What I didn't like in the end was running up and down the hall from one end to the other looking after more patients than I felt comfortable looking after and not being able to give 100% and the type of quality nursing care that I expect of myself, to each one of them: Leaving me most often feeling completely defeated and wondering if I made any serious mistakes during my shift because I was so busy.
The job I'm going to is a dream job for nurses. A clinic setting. No heavy lifting. Monday to Friday day shift. All weekends and holidays off. More responsibility and the opportunity to work more independently out from under the thumb of a ward charge nurse; basically the opportunity to make my own decisions instead of relaying the situation to a charge nurse and having her decide what to do.
I've been preparing for this day for an entire month, yet not even a flicker of excitement.
God! I hope I made the right decision. It wasn't an impulsive move on my part. I had given it much thought over the months about wanting and needing a change in nursing setting, about not wanting to work shift work anymore, about wanting a less physically demanding job. It's everything that I had been looking for!
I just don't get why I'm not feeling all pumped up about this move.
I already miss my old job, and as much as I hated it at times, largely because of having to work short staffed and being completely bagged and 100% exhausted at the end of a shift, I mostly loved it.
I've always loved bedside nursing. What I didn't like in the end was running up and down the hall from one end to the other looking after more patients than I felt comfortable looking after and not being able to give 100% and the type of quality nursing care that I expect of myself, to each one of them: Leaving me most often feeling completely defeated and wondering if I made any serious mistakes during my shift because I was so busy.
The job I'm going to is a dream job for nurses. A clinic setting. No heavy lifting. Monday to Friday day shift. All weekends and holidays off. More responsibility and the opportunity to work more independently out from under the thumb of a ward charge nurse; basically the opportunity to make my own decisions instead of relaying the situation to a charge nurse and having her decide what to do.
I've been preparing for this day for an entire month, yet not even a flicker of excitement.
God! I hope I made the right decision. It wasn't an impulsive move on my part. I had given it much thought over the months about wanting and needing a change in nursing setting, about not wanting to work shift work anymore, about wanting a less physically demanding job. It's everything that I had been looking for!
I just don't get why I'm not feeling all pumped up about this move.