I used to be a semi-active member of this site about ten years ago, when I first got my “kids”, Carter and Lorelei.
About six months ago Carter died suddenly of a heart attack. I was devastated to lose him, he was my buddy that shared the spot under the covers with me every night. The only solace I had was from my girl Lorelei, who became ever more attached to me without her “brother”. We even moved from the USA to Europe together, and I was so grateful to have her with me because I was still grieving so much.
I found out yesterday Lorelei is in end stage kidney failure. I brought her in because her appetite plummeted and suddenly she was hiding in the closet but even then the news was a sucker punch. It doesn’t feel fair doing this again. The vet suggested giving her a shot to at least get her eating again, and we got some medication for her to help her eat. But this is just to keep her comfortable. She is in effect being given hospice care by me.
I was so distraught we went to get another opinion tonight. The vets have all been very kind of course. The one I saw tonight even said it was responsible to get a second check. But her blood work was too high and her kidneys are already too enlarged. They also agreed with the “hospice” option.
I’m just sitting here tonight with the awful feeling that I have to decide the day Lorelei dies. During the day she was eating better and her energy perked up. Tonight she suddenly feels like she’s slumping. I’m contemplating taking her in tomorrow if she’s this far gone in the morning or worse. And it’s tearing me up. I want her to go peacefully. Not too soon and not too late.
Because unfortunately “never” isn’t an option.
About six months ago Carter died suddenly of a heart attack. I was devastated to lose him, he was my buddy that shared the spot under the covers with me every night. The only solace I had was from my girl Lorelei, who became ever more attached to me without her “brother”. We even moved from the USA to Europe together, and I was so grateful to have her with me because I was still grieving so much.
I found out yesterday Lorelei is in end stage kidney failure. I brought her in because her appetite plummeted and suddenly she was hiding in the closet but even then the news was a sucker punch. It doesn’t feel fair doing this again. The vet suggested giving her a shot to at least get her eating again, and we got some medication for her to help her eat. But this is just to keep her comfortable. She is in effect being given hospice care by me.
I was so distraught we went to get another opinion tonight. The vets have all been very kind of course. The one I saw tonight even said it was responsible to get a second check. But her blood work was too high and her kidneys are already too enlarged. They also agreed with the “hospice” option.
I’m just sitting here tonight with the awful feeling that I have to decide the day Lorelei dies. During the day she was eating better and her energy perked up. Tonight she suddenly feels like she’s slumping. I’m contemplating taking her in tomorrow if she’s this far gone in the morning or worse. And it’s tearing me up. I want her to go peacefully. Not too soon and not too late.
Because unfortunately “never” isn’t an option.