I am sorry if this gets long and hard to follow. I really just need to vent, and i am crying as i type. I should be happy my girls will be here later today. but I am just so unbeliveably upset..
First off, Ex Wife number one, (the one the children are with) has delt yet another painfull blow to me. Steves family all dislike me at this point anyways, they have not met me yet, and think i am going ot be just like ex number 2, who is mean and worthless.
Anyways..we are trying to get Steves kids here for a week before they start school again (august first) after we were finally able to get ahold of them (oh yeah she moved several states..didnt tell him..than moved back..didnt tell him) well it sounded like everything was going to be a go. I was going to pay for the tickets for the kids to fly on the plane here and back, with supervision from the stewardess, personal and all paying the extra for it. We do not really have the spare money...She has the court ordered to take 899 a month from steves check, he makes base rate 960 a month BEFORE Taxes...
But I want him to see his kids, so I am chareging it. Something I never do. this is my ER Horse VET ER card. But I told him anything for his kids. and was going to be booking the flight as soon as she got a date back. I was getting really excited. I gave the kids each a horse for their birthday, again paid for with my own money, none of steves but i did sign his name of course. and all the upkeep has been ME. (I am not trying to toot my horn here but i am trying to show how much i care about these kids) their christmas presents were also bought by me, dad of course was in a tight spot with all the money going out the door for the kids. He gladly pays support but he is getting nailed still for when he maid..26 dollars an hour as an Iron worker.He now makes 6 bucks an hour base rate.
So as I said I am getting excited. The kids will be coming. I am going to have the horses ready for them to see, looking great, the cats, the dogs..they will be getting the bedroom, its going to work out great. Steve cant take off work for the week they would be here,because hes new at his job..and well she is taking so much money hes left in the negative as it IS. But I work from home. hes going to be taking the 9-5, i work from 3-11 so it works out fine. I can watch them and play games during the day. and when I do start work at three, they will just be in theo ther room watching tv, or I was going to switch my shifts to work 6pm-2am..to make sure they would have attention allt he time...no problem...
well here is the email....gotten today. Supposedly from the kids. spelled child like..but I just dont buy its from the kids...some stuff is edited out. and only the info related to this topic is in here..
"I
told my mom that you said katie would be watching us while you work and she
said that she told you that she didn't want katie watching us. Iif katie
does watch us mom is going to be really mad. She doesn't know katie. she
said that if you are going to be working that week then we don't need to go.
there nothing in the divorce papers about out of state visits. if granny
is off that weekend then maybe she come with us and watch us while you work.
levi has allergies and asma so you need to know how to take care of him.
mom says that if you lie to her and have katie watch us then you'll have to
take her back to court for visitations becase krystel use to be mean to us
and lock us in the basement when you were gone doing something and shes not
going to let you make those desisions anymore cause you have done stuff like
this before with kristel If katie does something to us while you're at work
then she'll get in trouble and shes just like krystel. I don't want her to
be. but if that's the way she's going to act then so beit. You better just
warn her not to spank us or slap us. mom says katie might not be like
kristel but she might be and kristel hurt us and she dosnt have to let
anyone elsehurt us again.You're going to have to call granny and see if she
has work that week. if she does then you'll have to take off work that week.
You better explan to your boss that this is the only time you can see your
kids make sure you makeher not yell becase it hurts our ears when people
yells"
I dont know where this has come from. I have never done anything to these kids at all to even make anyone think I would do anything like that! And "Kristel" is ex number two..now she is a looney..yes..but Steve never saw any of the things that are said going on, and if they did happen (I am by no means saying they did not..but it could be a story..but I wouldnt say that to be truth I dont know it could have happened and may not have) this is the FIRST he knows of it.
I am just bawling my eyes out. I would NEVER do anything like that to these kids, ANY kid. I mean...for crine out loud..I was a Girl Scout conserlour and Wragnler, for several years. I was intrusted with hundreds of children around large animals. I threw myself in harms way on countless ocassion to save the child! I have the medical bills to prove it!
I am extenstively trained in first aid (that would cover the whole "Asthma" excuse) I am just bawling. There is no way steve can take off work, and there is NO WAY his mother will be allowed to stay here so the children can. She has bad mouthed me already with out meeting me, and we just plain old dont have the room! And no where in any court document does it state he has to have SUPERVISED visits..which frankly is what that would be!
I am just..shocked..and so...I dont know..I cant stop crying. I would never hurt a child, and for someone to think about..even trying to say I would!
And the worst thing is I feel horrible now because even if they DO get to come, i do not know if I want to be in the house. I may leave for the week. I dont want to feel like i have to walk on eggshells in my own home. I would neevr slap or hit a child EVER! would I and have I raised my voice to give discipline? YES...would i just yell and scream for no reason? NEVER. I just dont know what to do anymore.I have done so much..and this is how I get made to feel...i am bawling....just...I am sorry guys. I just do not know what to do this is so upsetting, and I feel like the most horrible person in the world.
First off, Ex Wife number one, (the one the children are with) has delt yet another painfull blow to me. Steves family all dislike me at this point anyways, they have not met me yet, and think i am going ot be just like ex number 2, who is mean and worthless.
Anyways..we are trying to get Steves kids here for a week before they start school again (august first) after we were finally able to get ahold of them (oh yeah she moved several states..didnt tell him..than moved back..didnt tell him) well it sounded like everything was going to be a go. I was going to pay for the tickets for the kids to fly on the plane here and back, with supervision from the stewardess, personal and all paying the extra for it. We do not really have the spare money...She has the court ordered to take 899 a month from steves check, he makes base rate 960 a month BEFORE Taxes...
But I want him to see his kids, so I am chareging it. Something I never do. this is my ER Horse VET ER card. But I told him anything for his kids. and was going to be booking the flight as soon as she got a date back. I was getting really excited. I gave the kids each a horse for their birthday, again paid for with my own money, none of steves but i did sign his name of course. and all the upkeep has been ME. (I am not trying to toot my horn here but i am trying to show how much i care about these kids) their christmas presents were also bought by me, dad of course was in a tight spot with all the money going out the door for the kids. He gladly pays support but he is getting nailed still for when he maid..26 dollars an hour as an Iron worker.He now makes 6 bucks an hour base rate.
So as I said I am getting excited. The kids will be coming. I am going to have the horses ready for them to see, looking great, the cats, the dogs..they will be getting the bedroom, its going to work out great. Steve cant take off work for the week they would be here,because hes new at his job..and well she is taking so much money hes left in the negative as it IS. But I work from home. hes going to be taking the 9-5, i work from 3-11 so it works out fine. I can watch them and play games during the day. and when I do start work at three, they will just be in theo ther room watching tv, or I was going to switch my shifts to work 6pm-2am..to make sure they would have attention allt he time...no problem...
well here is the email....gotten today. Supposedly from the kids. spelled child like..but I just dont buy its from the kids...some stuff is edited out. and only the info related to this topic is in here..
"I
told my mom that you said katie would be watching us while you work and she
said that she told you that she didn't want katie watching us. Iif katie
does watch us mom is going to be really mad. She doesn't know katie. she
said that if you are going to be working that week then we don't need to go.
there nothing in the divorce papers about out of state visits. if granny
is off that weekend then maybe she come with us and watch us while you work.
levi has allergies and asma so you need to know how to take care of him.
mom says that if you lie to her and have katie watch us then you'll have to
take her back to court for visitations becase krystel use to be mean to us
and lock us in the basement when you were gone doing something and shes not
going to let you make those desisions anymore cause you have done stuff like
this before with kristel If katie does something to us while you're at work
then she'll get in trouble and shes just like krystel. I don't want her to
be. but if that's the way she's going to act then so beit. You better just
warn her not to spank us or slap us. mom says katie might not be like
kristel but she might be and kristel hurt us and she dosnt have to let
anyone elsehurt us again.You're going to have to call granny and see if she
has work that week. if she does then you'll have to take off work that week.
You better explan to your boss that this is the only time you can see your
kids make sure you makeher not yell becase it hurts our ears when people
yells"
I dont know where this has come from. I have never done anything to these kids at all to even make anyone think I would do anything like that! And "Kristel" is ex number two..now she is a looney..yes..but Steve never saw any of the things that are said going on, and if they did happen (I am by no means saying they did not..but it could be a story..but I wouldnt say that to be truth I dont know it could have happened and may not have) this is the FIRST he knows of it.
I am just bawling my eyes out. I would NEVER do anything like that to these kids, ANY kid. I mean...for crine out loud..I was a Girl Scout conserlour and Wragnler, for several years. I was intrusted with hundreds of children around large animals. I threw myself in harms way on countless ocassion to save the child! I have the medical bills to prove it!
I am extenstively trained in first aid (that would cover the whole "Asthma" excuse) I am just bawling. There is no way steve can take off work, and there is NO WAY his mother will be allowed to stay here so the children can. She has bad mouthed me already with out meeting me, and we just plain old dont have the room! And no where in any court document does it state he has to have SUPERVISED visits..which frankly is what that would be!
I am just..shocked..and so...I dont know..I cant stop crying. I would never hurt a child, and for someone to think about..even trying to say I would!
And the worst thing is I feel horrible now because even if they DO get to come, i do not know if I want to be in the house. I may leave for the week. I dont want to feel like i have to walk on eggshells in my own home. I would neevr slap or hit a child EVER! would I and have I raised my voice to give discipline? YES...would i just yell and scream for no reason? NEVER. I just dont know what to do anymore.I have done so much..and this is how I get made to feel...i am bawling....just...I am sorry guys. I just do not know what to do this is so upsetting, and I feel like the most horrible person in the world.