I am going to get laughed at but I need advice, y’all!

[lallorona]

Ok guys, this might be a lengthy one but bear with me.

soooo, I am planning on getting my nose pierced. Big deal. Everyone does it. Yeah I know. Lol but my main concern is my dad’s reaction.
Now let me clarify that I am not underage, I am almost 30. I don’t live with my parents, I have my own job, pay my bills, have a family etc etc…. All that adult stuff. My dad has always had something to say about people with tattoos and piercings. He’s very conservative, and old fashioned. I’m talking about piercings-are-for-earlobes and paying-your-bills-online-isn’t-a-thing old fashioned. I don’t know if I should let him know that I’m going to get it, or if I should just “surprise him” and just show up at his house with it. You guys are probably like “girl you’re old enough to make these decisions!!” I know I don’t need his permission. But he’s going to be disappointed and there’s a chance he might say something that will annoy me, so that’s why I’m a little….. scared? (For a lack of better word). I’m getting it regardless. And I can probably avoid him for so long without him seeing it. So I’m thinking I might as well tell him it’s getting done before it does, but I really don’t know how to go about it. I know it’s not like he’s going to disown me or anything like that. I need advice, guys. What should I do?? Should I give him a heads up, or surprise him?

 

[Mamanyt1953]

HOOOOO BOY! LOL, my mother felt the same way, and fainted when I came home with pierced ears! I told her I was going to do it, but she still fainted, because she didn't believe I "really would mutilate myself like that." She got used to the idea eventually, and even purchased a pair of real pearl earrings for me eventually. I'd tell him. And I'd do it saying, "Dad, I know how you feel about this, and I won't change my mind on this one, but..." And when he goes off on a tirade about it, simply say, "I love you so much, and we can talk about this when you are a bit calmer," and hang up.

 

[furmonster mom]

Humanity has been piercing and tattooing for thousands of years.

Maybe put it into a historical perspective? Tell him you’re getting in touch with your primal self….

 

[neely]

When I was in middle school I wanted pierced ears so bad but my mother thought I was too young. She also was a bit like your dad, i.e. old fashioned. Since I was too young to go by myself I had to get her approval so she could take me. It took me a whole year to talk her into it but I was persistent and after I had them pierced she was actually okay with it. I would give your dad a head's up but tell him you're old enough to make your own decisions. Remind him there's an old saying that goes, "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all."

 

[game misconduct]

get the bar one between your nostrils that way you can kinda tuck it away up in your nostrils he wont notice it for a long time

 

[lallorona]

get the bar one between your nostrils that way you can kinda tuck it away up in your nostrils he wont notice it for a long time

I’m getting my nostril pierced (on the side). I’ve always wanted to get it pierced. Personally, I don’t think the septum would look good on me. It’s one of those where it looks good on everyone else except me

 

[maggie101]

I’m getting my nostril pierced (on the side). I’ve always wanted to get it pierced. Personally, I don’t think the septum would look good on me. It’s one of those where it looks good on everyone else except me

Just don't get a cold. Something I will never do but having it done on the side would be more comfortable. My co worker also has her lips and eyebrows done

 

[lallorona]

When I was in middle school I wanted pierced ears so bad but my mother thought I was too young. She also was a bit like your dad, i.e. old fashioned. Since I was too young to go by myself I had to get her approval so she could take me. It took me a whole year to talk her into it but I was persistent and after I had them pierced she was actually okay with it. I would give your dad a head's up but tell him you're old enough to make your own decisions. Remind him there's an old saying that goes, "if you don't have anything nice to say don't say anything at all."

Humanity has been piercing and tattooing for thousands of years.

Maybe put it into a historical perspective? Tell him you’re getting in touch with your primal self….

HOOOOO BOY! LOL, my mother felt the same way, and fainted when I came home with pierced ears! I told her I was going to do it, but she still fainted, because she didn't believe I "really would mutilate myself like that." She got used to the idea eventually, and even purchased a pair of real pearl earrings for me eventually. I'd tell him. And I'd do it saying, "Dad, I know how you feel about this, and I won't change my mind on this one, but..." And when he goes off on a tirade about it, simply say, "I love you so much, and we can talk about this when you are a bit calmer," and hang up.

Not only is he old fashioned, but he was also overly strict. Growing up my dad was always the kind that wouldn’t let us express ourselves. He expected us to dress in a way that he deemed appropriate. He didn’t allow me to paint my nails black. Only “pretty” colors. I used to paint them anyway but clean it off before he got home. It wasn’t until I was 15 that I started to leave the paint. Back in my teens I used to dress up like a “rocker” and he hated that. He said only people who’d dress like that do drugs & alcohol. I never touched any those things. Never broke the law, never ran away from home, etc. never did any of those things he claimed “rockers” do. Once I was about 17 or 18 he stopped pestering me about it because he knew I wasn’t going to change my appearance. You’ll still occasionally see me wearing a band shirt, or horror movie related clothing (we’re horror fans here!). Just the other day I was wearing my Michael Myers sweater and he told me i should dress more “formal” to work. I think that is also why I’m kind of dreading telling him about the piercing. He would get mad if we didn’t look “decent”. He’s not going to stop me from getting it obviously or tell me to take it off once I get it pierced. If anything, he would probably be more mad over a tattoo than a piercing. Still, I don’t want to hear it.

 

[lallorona]

Just don't get a cold. Something I will never do but having it done on the side would be more comfortable. My co worker also has her lips and eyebrows done

Yes, that’s where I’m going to get it on the side. I’ve always wanted to get it pierced, since high school. But for obvious reasons I couldn’t haha

 

[maggie101]

Ya,I wouldn't to be stuck with tattoos when I'm 90 yrs old! Hope it works out for you!

 

[denice]

Just go ahead and do it. Your father will have a lot to say about it, you know it already, so why also listen to him trying to talk you out of it. He probably will be more upset if he tries to talk you out of it and you go ahead and do it anyway. Just get it done and pretend to listen while he complains about it. At some point he will get over it he doesn't really have a choice.

 

[di and bob]

Yeah, just do it and show up one day. You might warn him first on the phone. Just bring it up when you talk to your family and say you didn't want them to be surprised. that way they can mull it over before you actually show up and get over the worst. You know everything is going to hit the fan, but he'll have time to cool down after the initial shock. Once you are out of the house they have no say so in your life. Tell them it is something you have thought about for a long time. You can always leave if things escalate. He may always say something, but he will get over it. TIME.

 

[misty8723]

When I was young, my mother was against piercings of any kind. So when I was 16 and had a job, I stopped on the way home from work and got my ears pierced. I was very nervous to show my mother, but she was very cool. After the fact, however, I wished I had just told her, and maybe had her come with me when I got it done. I personally would not want piercing any other place on my face, but to each their own, and if you are sure you want it, go for it.
My mother also didn't want me to shave my legs. It got so it was embarassing and I just went and did it one day. Sometimes you just have to do what is best for you.

Ya,I wouldn't to be stuck with tattoos when I'm 90 yrs old! Hope it works out for you!

I've often wondered what happens when people get tired of their tatoo. Is that why some people get so many of them? I mean, you can take off a piece of jewelry if you get tired of it, but it's a whole lot harded to get rid of a tatoo.

 

[MoochNNoodles]

I like the advice of giving him heads up saying you know he won’t approve but he also won’t change your mind; but you don’t want to surprise him.

My cousin is an OR nurse and still wears her nose piercing outside of work. On her its cute and doesn’t seem out of place at all. She mostly wears a tiny diamond. My nose isn’t shaped right for that.

As for tattoos; I doubt any of us will have fantastic looking skin at 90. My bestie has quite a few and I have none. But that’s always been her reply to that. I think most of hers have meaning but some she just likes. She’s in church every Sunday and no one bats an eye anymore. Culture changes and we can’t please everyone. Even my husbands job has relaxed the rules on things in the last 20 years.

 

[strider rose]

lallorona i wish the best either way hun

 

[susanm9006]

Maybe spring it on him at the very last minute. “Hey dad, I am waiting to get my nose pierced. Just didn’t want you to to be surprised when you see me.” That way he knows but doesn’t have time to object.

 

[di and bob]

I worked in nursing homes and can tell you at an advanced age tattoos aren't even recognizable on most people. They just look like blobs. They sure do ID you though.

 

[Tik cat's mum]

My dad was old fashioned too. I remember as a teen just walking in the door with my hair bleached, he hit the roof shouting the moment he saw me. I never told him I was dying my hair because I knew what he'd say. I remember him going off on one with my brother too, he came home with a tattoo at 16. The thing about my dad was once he'd ranted that was it. When I got my ears peirced I was only allowed one earing in each ear. As I got older he came to accept my hair and piercings. Thing is I'm 53 now, my nose closed up year's ago but I have tattoos actually booked in for another on Wednesday. And found myself saying to my daughter 31 why do you want to put hole's in your beautiful face. She now has nose, medusa, snake bites and ears they look pretty good on her. So I think you'll have to do what makes you happy and let your dad have his say. Your old enough to do as you please. He'll get over it. And don't take what he says to heart. He loves you.

 

[Kat0121]

You're old enough to make your own decisions. You've been thinking it over for a long time so it's not a rash decision. Get it. If he doesn't like it then that is a him problem not a you problem. If he has issues with it say this.

"You raised me to think for myself and be my own person so that's what I'm doing."

No one is laughing at you. That's not what we're about. We are here to support cats AND each other.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

I've often wondered what happens when people get tired of their tatoo.

If you choose a tattoo that is deeply meaningful to you, you won't. Not ever. Nor will it bother you much when it sags and bags and fades, because you still know what it means. LOL, I have two of them, and no one but the artist myself, my ex husbands, and a handful of medical personnel have ever seen them, or ever will.