He Is Afraid Of Everyone

[Miledith]

My cat is a huge sweetheart. He likes to cuddle and sleeps in my or my mother's bed, but when he is awake and roaming around the house or outside he will run from anyone trying to approach him, even me and my mom. He is especially afraid of my older brother and whenever I carry him and enter my bother's room, he will get tense and try to get away from there. I don't know why he's so scared of him and at first I thought it might be due to the fact he is working a lot and is not home often and when he is, he doesn't socialize with the cat, but when my boyfriend visited me, the cat wasn't that scared even though he didn't know him. Does anyone have any idea why that might be the case? We adopted him along with other cat who unfortunetely gone missing when they were both little kittens. Since then he's behavior got much better as he stopped hiding from everyone and got to socializing with me and mom, but he still doesn't like to be touched and runs from us when he is walking around (even though he has no problem with contact when we give him food or when he gets in our beds for cuddles).

 

[Furballsmom]

It sounds like time will help with things.
It's really hard to know why your brother would be a concern to your cat whereas your boyfriend is not, but possibly your boyfriend is generally less stressed? I'm not saying that's good or bad, just a comment as to possibly why your cat is more comfortable with your bf.

You-all and your brother could try putting a calming diffuser in his room or elsewhere, or even try a calming spray on his clothing.

Have your brother be the one to feed treats and give food, then have your brother walk away and basically ignore the cat. Oftentimes cats are more at ease when they aren't being looked at.

 

[Miledith]

I didn't expect such a fast reply, but I'm thankful for all the advice I will definitely try getting my brother to make the kitty more comfortable around him, because I would really like the cat to stop being so scared.

 

[Furballsmom]

 

[Tobermory]

Is your brother a big guy with a deep booming voice? Does he have a beard? Weird questions, I know, but I’ve noticed that some of the animals at the sanctuary where I volunteer are more afraid of men, particularly large men with big voices. And beards. (“I thought it was hooman but it’s furry,” says Cat. “Must not be hooman. I fear it.”)

 

[Miledith]

My brother is rather tall and of an athletic build. I'd say he's got an average man voice. Maybe that's partially a reason why the cat is afraid of him?

 

[Furballsmom]

Maybe, what if he sits on the floor with her sometimes? In other words, more down at her level...

 

[Tobermory]

My brother is rather tall and of an athletic build. I'd say he's got an average man voice. Maybe that's partially a reason why the cat is afraid of him?

Could be. Or maybe he reminds your kitty of someone in his past who scared him. Doodles, one of the sanctuary cats, will suddenly become aggressive if you pet him the wrong way. He reacts to being told “no” or “hey,” even gently, by flinching sharply away. I believe someone in his past played rough with him, and when he played rough back, they hit him. Mocha, my four-year-old adoptee whom I’ve had for eight months, clearly comes with a lot of fears that are hard to account for. I’ve let her develop at her own pace and gradually she’s getting more relaxed and trusting.

 

[mocha bee]

My Delilah who is 6 has been with us for 2 years. She will sit near me but I can not even try to pick her up. She runs when my husband or anyone else comes into the room even thou my husband feeds her in the morning. I have read that melatonin might help has anyone had success with it.