frustrating, demanding cat!

[venusgirltrap]

my cat is an alpha (not as bad as yours it seems) and this is what I do to deal with her:

1. pet herwhen she wants but when she flicks her tail I stop and ignore. If she bits I yell out and ignore her.
2. Feed her a snack right before bed and set the auto feeder to go off in 6 hours. She likes to eat many small meals a day and if she does she usually won't bug me for food.
3. if she wakes me up put ear plugs in.
4. learn to deal with her brattiness.

 

[shanynne]

Originally Posted by TROANT

hi, welcome to the site! dont feel judged. people here love their cats so much and sometimes they come across very aggresive, they dont mean it, its just that they love their cats alot and they are worried about your cat. they are trying to give you advice so just look through all the the stuff you think is judgemental and take their advice because they only want to help, but i know sometimes it can come across in the wrong way.xx

Yes very well said and so very true! We only want to help!! That being said, I think you are incredibly kind hearted to have taken in this poor cat.


The shelter you adopted her from did you a great disservice. They had an obligation to inform you of her health issues and they also had an obligation to make certain she was healthy before handing her over to you. What they did was very irresponsible. I believe you have the legal right to return the cat to them for appropriate treatment. This happened to me once, I adopted a kitten who had Coccidia. When I brought the kitten to the vet he was very upset and said that he was going to report them. I just wish I remembered the name of the governmental agency he mentioned. So I brought the kitten back to the shelter and told them what the vet said. Well guess what? They treated him! That kitten is still with me by the way, he's now almost 3 years old.


You mentioned an $800 surgery. Who told you this? If it was your vet, what kind of tests or treatment did he offer for her condition in the meantime?


Your cat does need to get treated for that mucus problem. Especially because if, as has Stephanietx mentioned, the mucus is not clear, it's possible that your first cat will get infected from it also and you really don't want that.


Concerning the food issue. Free feeding her might be a good idea. I also liked Otto's suggestion of feeding her smaller, but more frequent meals. Keep in mind, however, that she may always have that fear of lack of food. Yes it can be very annoying when a cat is constantly harassing you for food. But at the same time, they are helpless and completely dependent on you to feed them. Just think about it, you can eat whenever you want, but your cat can't. She is at your mercy. Please try to put yourself in your cat's shoes.


Also remember that because you don't know what happened to her in the past, it might take a long time to get to the point where she trusts you enough to let you hold her and let you clean her up some. Bringing in that kind of cat into your home is much more complex than an average cat. The one thing you can do is just try to be extra gentle, patient and loving with her. She needs that reassurance that she is loved and wanted. Playing with her is wonderful but she needs more than that, she really needs that extra attention. Talk to her a lot, especially when you're trying to clean her up. Please believe me when I say that I am NOT being judgmental. I honestly don't think anyone here was trying to be. We just all want to help.



Without a doubt cats can and do sense not only our moods but our intent. So how you are feeling around her and when you are trying to clean her up is important. A vet I used to go to declawed his own cat, the one he kept at his clinic. He said the cat was too aggressive. I was so upset that he did that to his own cat, I never went back to him. But, I did spend some time with his cat. Turns out all the poor thing wanted was some love and attention.


Honestly, I would go back to the shelter and see what can be worked out, as far as treating her goes. If they don't want to help I think there is a governmental health agency they can be reported to. It was definitely not right of them to not let you know of her health issues. And if you feel that it is too much for you to handle and don't want to keep her, that is for you alone to decide and no one should judge you for it.


At the same time, something in your heart moved you to adopt that baby. And although you are definitely going through a rough patch right now, maybe once she is healed of her mucus infection and has had a chance to bond with you, down the road, you might be surprised to find you will have fallen in love with a most loving, caring and grateful cat.


Hope this helps.

*
*

 

[bookworm]

I had a cat that sneezed thick gunky snot everywhere, all the time. I had to clean the window she sat in front of daily, and yup sometimes had to wash my hair as soon as I woke up. Within a day of starting a new round of antibiotics she would clear up, a day after she finished them it would start again. When I began to add L lysine to their drinking water daily it took about six weeks before her immune system built up to the point that the antibiotics were able to actually knock out the infection, but eventually it did go away. The Lyline pills made for humans can be used and don't cost too much, just mix them in something really strong smelling to cover the taste.

It sucks not having enough money for the vet, just adds to your frustration and makes you feel as if you are letting the animal down. I don't know how I'll pay my other bills after this weeks vet bill, to be honest, but somehow I'll borrow from Peter to pay Paul, and hope Mary doesn't sneak up with her hand held out too.

Maybe if you try to just stash back a little every week eventually it will add up, and you'll feel better too knowing that you're working towards getting her fixed up.

Some of that may just be her personality, but some may be from her feeling bad. I know the headache that comes with a sinus infection turns me into an ill tempered sharp tongued witch. We had Angel for a year with an infection that wouldn't heal despite surgery and antibiotics, and she was a most unpleasant room mate. When the vet gave up and said we either needed to amputate or euthanize I sold my truck to pay for the amputation, wondering if it was a cruel thing to do to her. I guess not, becuse after wards she became a sweet and affectionate (but still alpha

) cat.

 

[addiebee]

OK --- reading everything here and reposting just in case you haven't stomped off in an irrational funk and plan to come back.

I am going to take a guess here and say -as others have - that kitty's bad behavior could very well be driven by her physical issues. Those need to be addressed as best as you can. Lysine is a great tool for the immune system. My heart goes out to her. She sounds like an animal in terrible distress.

I would also agree that you should go back to the shelter and demand some help, since they apparently misrepresented her condition.

I also agree that your distaste for this cat and her "disgusting" physical problems is working its way into the relationship and helping to impede any forward progress. It is also impeding your ability to JUDGE what is being said here, IMHO.

I haven't had snotty cats, but I have had bitey cats.... one I just didn't know WHAT I was going to do (foster cat). Lots of hard work, patience and advice from HERE .. he is now a huge love bug and ready to find his furever home.

And yes -I am in depression-racked Michigan, just like you are, and work has been slooooooowwwwww. You just find ways to manage.

ETA - Try Dr. Bill MacArthur at Affordable Vet in AA. On Ashley just south and west of downtown. Get HIM - not one of his young and not so great associates - to look at your cat. He is a terrific vet. And very reasonably priced.