Flakes might have cancer - I'm scared and I'm angry

[jersharocks]

I just found out today that my cat Flakes might have cancer. The vet seemed quite sure but they took a sample to send out to a pathologist to confirm and we should know within about 2 days.

My sweet furbaby is at least 16 years old and he's been a part of my family for over 15 years. He was first my mom's cat and then when I got married 12 years ago, he came to live with us. He's been pretty healthy (impeccable blood tests, vets often don't believe us when we tell them his age) aside from some random stuff here and there like URIs. In the past few months though he's needed several teeth pulled. The first extractions were done in April and it had to be done at a different vet than our regular one because our regular one was closed due to a possible COVID exposure. The new vet messed up so bad (I won't go into too much detail), they didn't do any X-rays and missed teeth that needed to be removed AND their techs forgot to put ointment on his eyes so they dried out and he got a corneal ulcer.

Luckily our regular vet opened back up so all visits from then on were there. On top of the ulcer, Flakes had uveitis in his eye and the first vet missed it. Our regular vet treated it and it went away. After the first extractions healed, we noticed that Flakes was still having some dental pain so we did another exam and got X-rays done this time. They found a few teeth that needed to be pulled and after a quick call to ask if it was OK, they pulled them while he was already under for the exam. That was a couple weeks ago. He had the uveitis in his eye flare up again after the extraction for some reason and the vet prescribed medicine to get it under control.

About a week later, we started to notice that his face was swelling up on the same side as the eye with uveitis and his eye was watering a lot. So he had yet another vet visit. This time they said it was an abscessed tooth and they scheduled him for their first available surgery spot which was today.

A couple hours after we dropped him off, they called with the terrible news. The abscess was not an abscess but it was a tumor and they are pretty sure it's cancer. And based on my research, oral cancer is basically a quick death sentence for any cat and treatment is often not worth it. It might prolong his life slightly but it also might not.

I am heartbroken and scared. I don't want to lose my cat but I also don't want to prolong his suffering. And I am angry because I don't know how this could have crept up so quick with all the vet visit. And I'm angry because I've done everything right as a pet owner and he's still sick. I've researched the best kind of cat food, the best cat litter, I've kept up on vet visits and dental cleanings, I make sure he drinks plenty of water, etc. I'm angry that my poor baby is going to die soon and there's nothing I can do to stop it. Cancer is the worst.

I hope that this is OK to post on this subforum, I wasn't sure where else to post it.

 

[FeebysOwner]

I hope he doesn't have cancer. But, if he does, just know that it wasn't something you could have changed or avoided. He has lived a lot longer than so many other cats, already - I am sure mostly because of your care. However, I know that doesn't make a bit of difference within your heart. Feeby is 16+ and I try to take each day at a time, because one never knows what may come next...

Please keep us posted. Our thoughts, prayers, wishes, and hopes are with you and Flakes.

 

[jersharocks]

I hope he doesn't have cancer. But, if he does, just know that it wasn't something you could have changed or avoided. He has lived a lot longer than so many other cats, already - I am sure mostly because of your care. However, I know that doesn't make a bit of difference within your heart. Feeby is 16+ and I try to take each day at a time, because one never knows what may come next...

Please keep us posted. Our thoughts, prayers, wishes, and hopes are with you and Flakes.

Thank you! It means a lot to me. Today has just been really rough. Flakes is home from his dental extraction and he seems so normal. He happily gobbled up his food and he's being super lovable. I hope that it's not cancer but it sure seems like it is. The vet seems very sure and the swelling is quite alarming.

 

[jefferd18]

Cancer is most often in the genes we inherit from our ancestors. It is usually age related as well and at sixteen your baby is already well into his seventies. I bring these facts up to tell you that in no way are you to blame if Flakes should happen to have cancer. Yes, there should be anger, but not directed at yourself. Instead it should be aimed at the first vets who royally screwed up and put him through more discomfort than he should have been. You can also be angry at the unfairness of life and the rough patches it puts us through, but please, do not be angry at yourself because you did everything in your power to ensure that Flakes had a wonderful life. Some kitties will never know that.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

I am so, SO sorry that you and Flakes are going through this. I am outraged at the first vet! But now you are on your way to actually knowing, and no matter how bad, it is better than not knowing. For now, just enjoy his good days, and may he have many, many more. The future will come when it will, and whatever that may be, you did the right thing for your cat! In the long run, that's all any of us can do. Just love him with all your heart, and come here when you need to vent. We are here, we care, and we are listening.

Lighting a candle for Binx, right now!

 

[jersharocks]

Thank you all! The past 2 days have been very rough. I swing wildly between bawling my eyes out thinking that my sweet baby will be gone soon and being completely numb and hoping that this is all just a bad nightmare or a mistake. My husband and I had "the talk" last night about end of life plans for Flakes and that is by far the most difficult conversation we've ever had in our 12 years of marriage. We don't have kids and don't plan on having any so Flakes is basically our baby.

We're still awaiting the results of the cytology, the vet expects that they'll arrive within the next hour or so. Flakes is doing so well, I am holding out hope that this swelling is something else. He's eating vigorously (even the food with medicine mixed in lol), sleeping in his normal spot on top of the cat tree, running after treats, and just acting 100% like himself.

The only thing I can really think of (after doing lots of googling) is that maybe there's some sort of infection because they weren't able to completely remove a tooth in the second round of extractions. One root was fused to his jaw so they had to leave it. But it seems like they would have that in their records and would have ruled it out as a cause for this swelling. The vet said it was definitely not an abscess because it didn't drain so I am at a loss for what it could be other than the cancer that she suspects. He's on antibiotics already too, he's been on those since 8/25 so unless these antibiotics are not the right kind then it seems unlikely that it's just an infection.

 

[jersharocks]

So the cytology results are back and basically they're inconclusive. The pathologist initially thought it was in the skin and said that it is benign and then the vet told them it was in bone and they said that was more suspicious. The pathologist recommended that they take more samples from different sites and run those. The vet is recommending that we go to a veterinary oncologist and the only one in this area is a 4 hour drive from here. UGH. I don't know what to do.

I've always trusted this vet office but recently we've been seeing a different vet. Our regular one (the cat whisperer) is so busy that we can't get any appointments with her and we're seeing one of her partners. Should we request to see our regular vet and see what she says? I don't want to offend anyone or waste anyone's time. Any thoughts?

 

[jefferd18]

I have crossed every finger for him, you, and your husband. Please keep us updated.

 

[jefferd18]

So the cytology results are back and basically they're inconclusive. The pathologist initially thought it was in the skin and said that it is benign and then the vet told them it was in bone and they said that was more suspicious. The pathologist recommended that they take more samples from different sites and run those. The vet is recommending that we go to a veterinary oncologist and the only one in this area is a 4 hour drive from here. UGH. I don't know what to do.

I've always trusted this vet office but recently we've been seeing a different vet. Our regular one (the cat whisperer) is so busy that we can't get any appointments with her and we're seeing one of her partners. Should we request to see our regular vet and see what she says? I don't want to offend anyone or waste anyone's time. Any thoughts?

Flakes is your cat and you can request to see any vet you wish. I doubt they will get offended, and if they do, they will get over themselves. This is way too serious to worry about hurt feelings.

 

[jersharocks]

Flakes is your cat and you can request to see any vet you wish. I doubt they will get offended, and if they do, they will get over themselves. This is way too serious to worry about hurt feelings.

Good point, I'm just worried about how long it will take to get an appointment with her. Ugh, this sucks so much. I don't know what to do.

I really don't want to make a 4 hour trip with Flakes. He HATES car rides, absolutely hates them and he's never been on any ride that long. The longest he's ever done is 30 minutes and he cried the whole time. And I'm sure it will be extremely expensive to see an oncologist and there's no guarantee at this point that he even has cancer. I'm not understanding the vet's logic that it would be better to see a specialist than to do more tests. My husband talked to her about all this so maybe I'm missing something, I called to talk to her but she's busy with patients and she's supposed to call me back later today.

 

[FeebysOwner]

Talk to your vet and see if you can't get some advice from her perspective. She may even be able to consult with the oncologist to see about alternatives that would enable you and she to work with the oncologist from afar.

 

[fionasmom]

I would think that in the course of events with Flake that they could manage to bump him up to see your regular vet without some horrendous wait. If it were me, I would get a little pushy about that.

Given that there is a dispute about what is going on, it is not surprising to me that they are making a referral. They may be thinking that if it is cancer, or not, the oncologist would be able to do a rule in or rule out diagnosis faster than the regular vet.

I do get it about the 4 hour drive and the stress. Could Flake be given a mild sedative for the trip?

 

[jersharocks]

I spoke to the new vet over the phone yesterday. I asked if it was possible that a retained tooth root could have caused this and she didn't think it was that. She also said that they did not see any retained roots on the x-rays which is odd because we were told in July that there was a root that was fused to his jaw that they had to leave. The vet that did that surgery moved to another facility, it was actually their last day there.

The new vet sent me the pathology report but she said that it had been sent to her prior to her explaining to the pathologist that it was growing in bone, not skin so the report doesn't really help me that much because it's not accurate. I did get the pathologist's contact information but at the bottom of the report, it says to contact your vet so I don't know if the pathologist will/can talk to me.

The vet explained to me that the reason for pushing the referral is that we don't want to waste any precious time if it is cancer which I get, I really do.

But we've talked about it and we don't think that cancer treatment is the right choice. Even if we could afford it (we probably could but just barely) and even if Flakes could do a 4 hour trip, it would be extremely rough on us and Flakes. It wouldn't just be 1 trip there and done, it would be repeated trips. It would be taking a cocktail of medications that could make him very ill (side effects aren't as common in cats but still a possibility) and even with aggressive treatment, it would likely only extend his life by a short amount of time. I feel like it would be so stressful (for him and us) for very little payoff. It's a very tough situation because I feel like I'm giving up on him but I don't want him to needlessly suffer.

I think we may look for another vet locally who can give us a second opinion and maybe one we can consult about surgically removing the tumor and having the tumor sent off for histology. It is in a tough spot though so I'm not hopeful that they can remove it.

 

[FeebysOwner]

I think obtaining a second opinion from another vet in an entirely different practice is the way to go. You can get copies of all Flakes' records to share with a new vet - at least reducing some of the costs related to redundant tests.

As you have already noted. many cats who receive chemo treatment do much better than humans do in terms of side effects. The only thing that would be needed in your case is a local vet who would be willing to act as an intermediary between you and the oncologist, to avoid having to take Flakes on multiple trips. I doubt this is common, but cannot imagine it has never been done before.

 

[fionasmom]

I agree that a second opinion with a vet in another practice is the best option. You are right about the repeated trips to the vet for cancer treatments as I have been there with the dog, but FeebysOwner point about finding an intermediary vet is a good idea. In the case of the immunotherapy that my dog had, it had to be administered by a veterinary oncologist alone....just in case you run into that obstacle...but I am not sure that is the case with all cancer treatments for animals.

 

[daftcat75]

I'm so sorry you and Flakes are going through this.

I have been watching this thread waiting to see if it was cancer before chipping in. However, since you already had the talk with your husband, I'll offer the best advice I received when deciding when it was time for my Cabernet who had oral SCC. In her case, her decline was very rapid. From when I noticed ropes of drool hanging from her mouth to her final appointment was maybe a week or two. My recommendation is to treasure every good day and make them all count. When he starts having bad days, give him daily cat scores. Score how well he is acting like a cat's cat. Did he sit or sleep in his favorite spots? Did he sit in the sun? Did he play? Did he interact with you and your husband? How was his eating, peeing, and pooping? In other words, assign a score to his quality of life that day. Decide with your husband below what score and for how many days are an unacceptable quality of life. This is how you attempt to make an objective decision out of a highly subjective experience. In Cabbie's case, she had a weekend of 2's (slept under the bed the entire weekend without eating and very little interaction with me.) That was enough to change her oncologist appointment to something more final.

You can continue to seek input and confirmation and save the cat scores for when he starts having bad days. But ask your vets this: what's the prognosis for where the tumor is if it is confirmed to be cancer? If it's a difficult place to remove the tumor, if it's an aggressive kind of cancer, if your opting out of chemo, then confirming the cancer diagnosis might not make much of a difference to the outcome anyway. If that's the case, then maybe save him the stress of more vet visits and procedures. Hold him closer, spoil him, and start the scores if he starts to decline.

Again, I'm so sorry you're going through this.

 

[Mamanyt1953]

NO reputable vet would be hurt by your asking a second opinion. Do so, if it will help.

Should this be carcinoma, and since you don't want to opt for treatment given how hard it would be on Flakes, and adding just a bit to daftcat75 's advice and experience, this would certainly help you chart how Flakes is doing, giving him every moment of "good time," and avoiding "bad time." In my thinking, anything that helps me take the emotions out of decisions like this is a wonderful tool to have.

The Feline Quality of Life Scale Helps You Determine If It's Time to Say Goodbye to Your Cat | Catster

 

[daftcat75]

NO reputable vet would be hurt by your asking a second opinion. Do so, if it will help.

Should this be carcinoma, and since you don't want to opt for treatment given how hard it would be on Flakes, and adding just a bit to daftcat75 's advice and experience, this would certainly help you chart how Flakes is doing, giving him every moment of "good time," and avoiding "bad time." In my thinking, anything that helps me take the emotions out of decisions like this is a wonderful tool to have.

The Feline Quality of Life Scale Helps You Determine If It's Time to Say Goodbye to Your Cat | Catster

I wish I had that Feline Quality Of Life Scale 15 years ago when I had to score Cabbie.

I normally don't recommend alternative medicine anymore because there is an opportunity cost with trying alternatives--namely that's time lost that could be spent on more proven treatments. But if you're skipping surgery and chemo, I don't see how this could hurt.

http://www.vitalityscience.com

The folks there can help you with product selection if you write or call them. They're usually good about returning messages within a day or two.

 

[catlover73]

I agree about getting a 2nd opinion for Flakes. I learned after dealing with a completely different issue in one of my cats to always follow my gut instincts. If it is an option perhaps looking for a feline only vet could be helpful. Just like human doctors some vets have more experience dealing with certain issues than others. I would not worry about your vet's office getting offended over getting a 2nd opinion. My friend has a cat being treated for a different cancer. She trusts her vet's office completely and has been going there for many years. She still got a 2nd opinion from a different vet's office for this. Her regular vet even encouraged the 2nd opinion. Both vet's came to the same conclusion and actually talked to each other.

 

[jersharocks]

Thank you all! I did get an appointment with our regular vet (let's call her Dr. J) at this practice. It's on Wednesday. I also asked around locally (using Nextdoor) to see if any local vet could treat cancer and wouldn't you know that someone mentioned Dr. J as someone who treated their cat's cancer? I don't know if there's some sort of miscommunication or what but I was shocked to find that out. I did some research on the new vet who did his extractions and told us that he has cancer and she is VERY new, as in, she graduated 3 months ago and this is her first job. I know it's a long shot but my hope is that she's making a mistake and that this isn't cancer.

I am keeping very detailed notes on how Flakes is doing. Each day I write down how he's acting, his eating, drinking, litter box usage, energy level and any other pertinent details. So far he's still acting completely normal aside from showing pain when he goes to eat and also when he sneezes (and he sneezes fairly often, poor guy).

He seems happier today, he even got in the condo part of his cat tree to get more sun and he hasn't done that in ages.