My fiancé is trying to get her cat used to my apartment and moved in some of the cat's items. Sometimes the cat will be sitting somewhere that I happen to walk by and hiss or growl at me. I understand the need to give the cat space, but I also need to go to the kitchen to eat, go to the bedroom to change or sleep, go to the bathroom, or leave for work. In those cases, giving the cat space is impossible without the ability to teleport. What can I do to avoid escalating things?
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Fiancé's Cat Moving In
- Thread starter dwnedcity
- Start Date
Hi. Anytime a cat is moved to a new home, it is best to start exposing them to just one room that they can consider their safe zone, and expand to other areas after an adaptation period. Maybe you can share this TCS article with your fiancé' and see if that might help to determine a better way to get her cat used to what will be their new home soon.
How To Help A New Cat Adjust To Your Home – TheCatSite Articles
How To Help A New Cat Adjust To Your Home – TheCatSite Articles
Hi, when you have a safe area set up for the cat, you might place a worn tshirt in the room to help acquaint her with your scent as well as over at your fiancee's place. Also, try leaving a favorite treat near her, she'll see you do that but also see that you walk away without doing anything more.
Here is one more article that could help:
14 Cat Experts Reveal: How To Get A Cat To Like Me – TheCatSite Articles
Here is one more article that could help:
14 Cat Experts Reveal: How To Get A Cat To Like Me – TheCatSite Articles
Its almost certainly going to be totally fine if your patient! The safe room advice was great, 100% the way to go in a house, but I did pick up on the fact that your in an apartment, and that can make the safe room strategy highly challenging if your in a one bedroom and borderline impossible in a studio. Its not a forever thing though, so if need be a bathroom or walk in closet can be used. Or you can pick your poison and go bedroom (usually the choice) or living room/kitchen. Bedroom is usually the choice because hiding under the bed can help the cat feel safe, and also he gets time near you while your quiet (sleeping).
Try to ignore the hissing and growling as much as possible.
Of course, when a cat hisses and growls, it means that you should keep your distance but, when it happens, just take a step back but try to pretend that you changed course for your own reasons instead of because the cat made a fuss.
Generally speaking, "ignoring" is a good thing in cat lingo.
Cats, being naturally wary creatures, will always be on the lookout whenever somebody or something comes near. If a cat goes "all eyes" on somebody when they walk into the room it's because they are watching out. If a cat looks away, turns its back or closes its eyes, it means that they are calm and comfortable. Generally speaking, when a cat ignores you, it means "I'm cool."
Ignoring (or pretending to ignore) is a good thing for a person to do when learning to get along with a new cat. If the cat sees the human ignore, it will assume that the human is "feeling cool" and will act accordingly. If the human approaches the cat too suddenly the cat will become anxious and the situation could devolve into a fit of hissing and growling.
Once the cat learns that you're not going to try to eat her, so to speak, she'll calm down and become more friendly.
Some things just take time.
Of course, when a cat hisses and growls, it means that you should keep your distance but, when it happens, just take a step back but try to pretend that you changed course for your own reasons instead of because the cat made a fuss.
Generally speaking, "ignoring" is a good thing in cat lingo.
Cats, being naturally wary creatures, will always be on the lookout whenever somebody or something comes near. If a cat goes "all eyes" on somebody when they walk into the room it's because they are watching out. If a cat looks away, turns its back or closes its eyes, it means that they are calm and comfortable. Generally speaking, when a cat ignores you, it means "I'm cool."
Ignoring (or pretending to ignore) is a good thing for a person to do when learning to get along with a new cat. If the cat sees the human ignore, it will assume that the human is "feeling cool" and will act accordingly. If the human approaches the cat too suddenly the cat will become anxious and the situation could devolve into a fit of hissing and growling.
Once the cat learns that you're not going to try to eat her, so to speak, she'll calm down and become more friendly.
Some things just take time.
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The Cat has not officially moved in yet? If she has been moving some things over and bringing the cat over for visits it’s worth remembering that Cats need security and the visits could end up doing more harm than good.
You have got good suggestions.
My contributions will be two ideas:
1. If its anxiety because of the changing of environments; which make many cats unsure, and thus defensive:
a) make sure she has a safe place; it may be her transport cage. And or the safe room, as suggested above.
b) you can try with a Feliway diffuser or Feliway spray for short term occasions.
2. The self process of how to get the cat friendly to you...
A memory arises; our first resident... He was friendly with me, but he was Mommas boy, I was sooner tolerated than liked...
But it changed when missus went away on some job journey, and I was alone several days with the cat... Giving food, treats, cuddles, emptying the litter, etc... Soon enough he went to my bed to sleep, etc...
Since these few days, he was my friend too.
My contributions will be two ideas:
1. If its anxiety because of the changing of environments; which make many cats unsure, and thus defensive:
a) make sure she has a safe place; it may be her transport cage. And or the safe room, as suggested above.
b) you can try with a Feliway diffuser or Feliway spray for short term occasions.
2. The self process of how to get the cat friendly to you...
A memory arises; our first resident... He was friendly with me, but he was Mommas boy, I was sooner tolerated than liked...
But it changed when missus went away on some job journey, and I was alone several days with the cat... Giving food, treats, cuddles, emptying the litter, etc... Soon enough he went to my bed to sleep, etc...
Since these few days, he was my friend too.
Give the cat a cardboard box 
on it’s side with a towel draped over 1/2 of the entrance. If the cat is in the box, ignore it completely.
Also get a cat tree or two to get the cat high up and confident.
Cats do not visit. So if the cat is going to live there, all of the cat’s stuff needs to come with the cat.
Try ignoring the cat but sitting down while reading softly out loud for a half hour every day.
A daily routine helps stressed out kitties.
on it’s side with a towel draped over 1/2 of the entrance. If the cat is in the box, ignore it completely.Also get a cat tree or two to get the cat high up and confident.
Cats do not visit. So if the cat is going to live there, all of the cat’s stuff needs to come with the cat.
Try ignoring the cat but sitting down while reading softly out loud for a half hour every day.
A daily routine helps stressed out kitties.
Some Feliway might help
Some catnip or silvervine can be good too
Cat calming music with purring (any streaming service has it)
Bribery with treats. Start with something high reward like a Churu
Some catnip or silvervine can be good too
Cat calming music with purring (any streaming service has it)
Bribery with treats. Start with something high reward like a Churu
Hi! I have adopted lots of outside kitties. 3 at one time… so the best honestly thing to do is bring the cat into one bedroom if you have an extra one. Put the litter and feed them in that room too and buy them a cozy large fluffy bed to snuggle in and a small scratching post. Then you can go in there when you want and visit and the cat will eventually get used to you. The hissing will eventually stop. She/he is nervous and can’t blame the cat in an unknown space. Harder on them than us. If you do this what happens is then in due time you can leave the door open and the cat will venture out but when they get nervous they Always run back to that same room.my new outside three do it All the time. When you walk by just ignore the hisses and growls don’t entertain them. They see you don’t react and they will stop. Try this I feel bad for the kitty she’s scared make her room cozy kitty trust me you’ll be happy and so will the cat!
Just a short comment: Some cats just love to hiss! Nine years ago Emily came to me as a foster with 4 kittens - she hissed at everybody so even self-named cat-whisperers wouldn't adopt her. She will still hiss at me (her best friend) if she thinks I'm going to do something she doesn't approve of - like move her gently off my lap or off the keyboard. I'm lucky if I don't get a swipe to follow. My daughter and the other cats get hissed at when they get too close to Emily but, we've learnt to accept that she likes her own company, When I returned home after 7 weeks in hospital and rehab. she jumped straight onto my lap and, if cats could cry, she was crying.
So, don't take the hissing personally. It's a form of communication. Even if it's permanent at least she's communicating and not just hiding.
Good luck.
So, don't take the hissing personally. It's a form of communication. Even if it's permanent at least she's communicating and not just hiding.
Good luck.
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