Did he know he was dying?

courtneecat · Dec 2, 2012

Okay so a little over a month ago, our cat, Niles, died from cancer. He had two tumors in his throat, which made eating and even breathing difficult, and he couldn't meow anymore.. I was at home the weekend he died and he just looked terrible. He was literally a skeleton with fur. On Friday he was still walking around and acknowledging you when you'd walk in a room, and he'd even still try to meow, which was extremely sad for me to see. On Saturday, he seemed to have gotten a little worse but he was still kind of walking around, but I'm wondering... did he know he was dying? He's normally a very mean, angry cat. He hated being touched ANYWHERE except his head and the back of his neck, and he hated being held by anyone but my mom. He never sat in my lap in all the 12 years we've had him, and on saturday, he came and just sat in my lap and was purring very loud, and he would follow me. If I went to my room, he would come there and just lay on the pillow I had for him on the floor, but when he sat there, he had a blank stare (if his eyes were open). I hated seeing him like this, I couldn't look at him without crying really hard, and I got a very strong vibe from him, it was almost like I could feel his pain and how miserable he was. I hated seeing him like that. He started getting a little skinnier in the stomach area earlier this year and in August I noticed the lump, and after that, he just rapidly lost weight and developed another tumor. he often scratched his neck and that made the a wound so his neck was filthy, and since he stopped cleaning himself, he just looked terrible. When I came home Thursday night, I walked in the bathroom (where he stayed) and as soon as I saw him, I immediately broke into tears and I cried so hard, and I couldn't stop, even after I left the room. It was so heartbreaking, especially for me since I'm a huge cat lover. The saturday of the weekend he died, I was up all night, often checking on him, and I just had a strong gut feeling that he was going to die very soon, which he did. He died Sunday around noon. Though I'm glad he isn't suffering, I hate that he died this way. I hate it so much, even typing all this gave me a lump in my throat and made me tear up. He could have lived so much longer, he was only 12. He was always very muscular (since he was an outdoor cat) and was literally fearless. He wasn't scared of ANYTHING. Two big dogs came in our front yard one day while he was out there, and his fur fluffed up SO big and he just ran up to both of them and slapped in the face and they took off. He was a badass cat. Though he was mostly mean all the time, I still loved him. I grew up with him since I was 7, and it hard to believe he's gone. He's the last childhood pet of mine that was still alive, and now that he's gone, all the pets and animals I knew from my childhood are dead, which is sad to me :/

And after that experience, I'm scared of my cat, Nala, dying like this. I'm so attached to her and she's just the PERFECT cat for me, and she loves me a **** load. I'm sure it would hurt much worse to see her go through what Niles did :'(

BUT ANYWAYS... did he know he was dying? Is that why he would sit in my lap and purr and want to always be around me? Because he's never been that way with me, ever, and I'm just curious if he was doing it to "say goodbye"

courtneecat · Dec 2, 2012

Oh and I have another question. Since Niles died, the two other cats, Abbey and Nala are always fighting, and it's Nala that goes and fights her, not the other way around. They never did that before, they used to play and get along decently, but now Nala always stares her down and will sneak up on her and attack her. When they fight, it's usually just Nala slapping at her and Abbey screams, a lotta times they just stare at each other and Nala moves her tail fast.

blueyedgirl5946 · Dec 2, 2012

I am sorry your cat suffered so. It is hard to say if he knew he was dying. He most likely was in pain. Cats are good at hiding how sick they really are. When we have pets we love, we also know that some day we are going to lose them. I understand your concern about your Nala and what she might endure before she dies. I can only give you my experience with my cats. I have lost two cats that I dearly loved. Max was a black and white tuxedo cat. He was 12 years old, got sick suddenly and went downhill very quickly. His kidneys were failing. He had always been a dignified cat and I wanted him to die dignified. When I knew he was not going to get better, as hard as it was, I made the decision to have him put to sleep. He was my soul mate cat. I was devastated and heartbroken. That was in 2005. l still think of him and cry sometimes. But I never regretted that I didn't have to watch him deteriorate and suffer. Then we had a big orange tabby named Speedboat. He was the love of my life and was 14 years old. He too got sick suddenly. His blood work was so terrible the vet thought he might hemmorage through his skin. His kidneys were still good, so we did try some different things with him. None of it worked and he continued to get worse. He quit eating. Once again we made that decision. On the morning we took him to the vet, knowing we wouldn't be coming home with him, I took his picture. He was laying by my kitchen door. He was a big beautiful cat, even then. Nobody could tell from his picture that he was dying. We never saw him get to be skin and bones or suffer. It is hard, but we believed we did what was best for our cats to let them die without suffering. YOu might want to consider making a decision like this for Nala when the time comes.

As for the change in the other two cats, remember they might be grieving. They also are probably having to work out an order of who is in charge now.
There is always a dominant cat and they might be deciding who gets to hold that position.

kafeid · Dec 2, 2012

He may have been coming to you for reassurance because he was feeling bad and scared. Cats purr when they are sick or need comfort, as well as when they're happy. He may have been saying goodbye, too. Dying a natural death is a difficult process, but it is a process, and I don't think it's out of the question to say that an animal, sentient or not, can be aware that it's losing a battle and needs to wrap things up.

courtneecat · Dec 2, 2012

I still get sad and cry about him. He was really an awesome cat. Here's pictures of him. In that one with me in it you can tell he's mean. He hated being held. The bottom left on the quad pic is a month before he died. He looked 18456984 times worse when he died </3 poor baby

http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b184/neopetlover0312/thm_php34VLX1.jpg

http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b184/neopetlover0312/Niles.jpg

http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b184/neopetlover0312/Picture114.jpg

And I really hope I never have to go through the process of putting Nala down. I love her as if she was my own. She's the sweetest cat I've ever seen, and I think it's just adorable how much she loves me.

kafeid · Dec 2, 2012

He's beautiful! Mean or not, I'm sure he loved you 100% of the time. He was lucky to have been so loved.

orientalslave · Dec 3, 2012

Cats don't have a conception of death like we do, so they can't know they are dying or terminally ill. They do know if they are in pain or otherwise not feeling well.

It's a very hard thing to do, but often the last kindness we can do our pets is take them to the vets to be put to sleep. So far I've had to do this 4 times, it never gets any easier but I know I did the best thing for my beloved cat. and that they didn't suffer at the end. In each case they would have died soon but they were all suffering in their own ways.

And it's normal that with Niles being gone your other cats are changing. They had an equilibrium with him there, now it's been altered and a new equilibrium has to be found.

Did he know he was dying?

courtneecat

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blueyedgirl5946

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