Could I Have Mistaken My Cat For Dead?

[Kamp]

Almost 2 weeks ago I was woken up by the sound of my 6 year old cat Molly falling from the couch. She had been acting totally normal before, no signs of illness at all. She was breathing really shallowly and her eyes where really dilated. I ran to her and put my had on her side (she was laying on her side) and she just stopped all movement suddenly. Then she appeared to stop breathing and her eyes and mouth stayed open and unmoving.


I pet her and moved her around a few more times and she was completely lax and limp. I then at the time realized she was dead. I got dressed and about 10-15 minutes later I came back to put her in a carrier to have her body picked up. The entire process from me being startled awake to putting her in the carrier was about 40 minutes.


I just keep having thoughts that I wasn't thinking clearly, that I was half asleep and freaking out. I made a lot of choices then that make no sense to me now, i.e. Not cremating her or getting a necropsy and being more mindful. I didn't double check that she was dead. Could I have thought she was dead when she wasn't? It all happened so fast. She was completely unmoving throughout and I struggled to even get her in the carrier. I saw and felt no chest or stomach movements and her eyes stayed fixed in place. My other cat refused to go near her And hid in a corner. I just can't stop thinking that I acted too quickly and frenzied and then just dumped her outside to be taken away by the city.


Could I have mistaken her for dead? I know I will never know for sure because I made so many mistakes and freaked out when I needed to stay calm the most, I really regret it. I wasn't thinking clearly. When I came to my senses I took my other cat for a checkup and the vet said she saw nothing out of the normal with her.

 

[maggiedemi]

I'm so sorry that this happened. I think she must have been dead because I'm sure she would have cried or showed some kind of movement when they were taking her away. Did they take her away in her carrier?

 

[kittensx4]

How awful for you. I am very sorry. I can say that when we lose a beloved pet, especially unexpectedly, we tend to question ourselves about all of it later. Please don't beat yourself up. Grief makes us think terrible things sometimes and unfortunately you were likely correct that Molly had passed.

 

[pushylady]

When we had our last cat put to sleep we took her body home from the vet. We both kept checking to see if she was actually still breathing, and I swore I saw her move once! It's such an upsetting time, and you just aren't thinking clearly, so these thoughts do happen.
I'm sorry you lost your cat so suddenly. I think it makes the situation worse when you haven't had any time to prepare for her passing.

 

[valentine319]

I'm so sorry you had to deal with such a horrible experience. We all tend to do some kind guilt and second guessing after losing our beloved pet. It's normal to freak out. Yes she had passed and no you did nothing wrong. Feel free to also post in the rainbow bridge forum. We're all here if you need to chat.

 

[Kamp]

I'm so sorry that this happened. I think she must have been dead because I'm sure she would have cried or showed some kind of movement when they were taking her away. Did they take her away in her carrier?

Thank you! Yes they did take her away in the carrier .

 

[Kamp]

How awful for you. I am very sorry. I can say that when we lose a beloved pet, especially unexpectedly, we tend to question ourselves about all of it later. Please don't beat yourself up. Grief makes us think terrible things sometimes and unfortunately you were likely correct that Molly had passed.

I think it could be grief. I just wish I had done some things totally differently. My vet said it was most likely a heart attack so I couldn't really have prevented it if she showed one warning signs.

 

[Kamp]

I'm so sorry you had to deal with such a horrible experience. We all tend to do some kind guilt and second guessing after losing our beloved pet. It's normal to freak out. Yes she had passed and no you did nothing wrong. Feel free to also post in the rainbow bridge forum. We're all here if you need to chat.

Thank you! I actually didn't scroll down far enough to see that.

 

[Kamp]

When we had our last cat put to sleep we took her body home from the vet. We both kept checking to see if she was actually still breathing, and I swore I saw her move once! It's such an upsetting time, and you just aren't thinking clearly, so these thoughts do happen.
I'm sorry you lost your cat so suddenly. I think it makes the situation worse when you haven't had any time to prepare for her passing.

It was so out of the blue! I just wish I had gotten some warning.

 

[valentine319]

I had an older cat who was walking funny. We did the vet and xrays. All was great. A week later she went to sleep under the bed and never woke up. I understand wanting a warning an answer. We always hope there was more we could have done. We analyze and chastise ourselves for the little things. It's part of the mourning process. It will pass. You did the best you could. We can't stop death. So many who have never had a close relationship with an animal could never understand you just lost a loved one. It's ok to mourn. I believe us questioning everything is part of that.

 

[valentine319]

I know it seems like you wanted notice but the good part is kitty didn't spend years sick. You didn't wonder for months when the time would come that you had to decide to put the cat to sleep. As disorienting as losing your cat fast is I feel long term issues leading to the decision of putting a cat to sleep is worse. You gave kitty a great life.

Maybe think of something to honor your cat. Paying for someone who can't afford it to adopt a pet. Poems or a memorial. Whatever you feel works for you.

 

[Kamp]

I had an older cat who was walking funny. We did the vet and xrays. All was great. A week later she went to sleep under the bed and never woke up. I understand wanting a warning an answer. We always hope there was more we could have done. We analyze and chastise ourselves for the little things. It's part of the mourning process. It will pass. You did the best you could. We can't stop death. So many who have never had a close relationship with an animal could never understand you just lost a loved one. It's ok to mourn. I believe us questioning everything is part of that.

What you said really resonates with me. I will always have questions but i just need to give myself time. I just wish i had acted differently, then maybe i wouldnt have so many questions. My vet told me cardiomyopathy can be really scary becase the first sign of it can be sudden death. I had no idea.

 

[Kamp]

I know it seems like you wanted notice but the good part is kitty didn't spend years sick. You didn't wonder for months when the time would come that you had to decide to put the cat to sleep. As disorienting as losing your cat fast is I feel long term issues leading to the decision of putting a cat to sleep is worse. You gave kitty a great life.

Maybe think of something to honor your cat. Paying for someone who can't afford it to adopt a pet. Poems or a memorial. Whatever you feel works for you.

Those are good ideas. I will try to do things like that. I did donate to the shelter i adooted her from and i plan to continue doing that monthly for as long as i can.

 

[valentine319]

What you said really resonates with me. I will always have questions but i just need to give myself time. I just wish i had acted differently, then maybe i wouldnt have so many questions. My vet told me cardiomyopathy can be really scary becase the first sign of it can be sudden death. I had no idea.

We tend to only find out about what can go wrong until it does. It's really hard when you and the Vet think you know what's wrong but it can't be fixed.

When my female died suddenly i immediately called the vet. I was fragmented and sounded insane. I can laugh at it now because it's not like the vet can magically fix it. I just needed to confirm I did everything I could. When I had her at the vet they had me giving something just in case it was arthritis. I needed to know it didn't kill her. That I didn't kill her.

I have peace knowing she didn't spend the end of her life at a No kill in a small cube because she had tested positive for FIV. She never had symptoms. But she got a cushy life until she passed. She loved all food. She loved being indoor only. She didn't suffer.

Take stock in the simple things we tend to not notice. Your cat never had to fight for food or worry about getting food. Got to be inside and unlimited naps. Got a loving human to care for kitty. So despite the loss remember "you did great, you were a great parent". Never forget that.