Cat Trying To Tell Me Something

[Furensics]

Hi everyone, I'm new here and need some advice...
I have a very strong connection with my two cats, male and female siblings, and we understand each other purrfectly.

I take them for walks, they watch for my signals or listen out for my instructions when on busy roads or if there's danger around...dogs for example.

One of them is more of an outdoor cat and I go and collect him every evening from several streets away, near my previous address, and clap my hands if I can't see him, he then comes running. His sister comes for the walk there and back and we often pop into see a friend at my old addeess.

About three months ago I went to his favourite fence and clapped my hands to call him, but from about 100 metres away another cat came running. I'd never seen this cat before, he's a very large beige tabby, but he seemed to know my call...maybe he'd been watching me for a while.

He followed me to my friends house where I fed my two, but refrained from feeding this new one, I know what cats are like, but he sits and waits for me at my friends house.
After a few days I realised he seemed to be losing a bit of weight, so I started to feed him, but I really don't know what this cat wants from me.

He will sit all day and all night on my friends doorstep just waiting for me, then try to follow me home. at one point I allowed him to stay in my front garden and fed him each morning and evening, but he just sits and waits for me all the time.
Every time I opened my door he was there, meeowing, even after just feeding him.

I had to stop him staying at mine because he was upsetting my other two cats, but still he sits and waits at my friends house. Other residents in the building feed him, everyone is good to him, but he doesn't want anyone but me, all the time.

I discovered from neighbours that they believe he has been homeless for a very long time, no one knows who he belongs to, so I tried homing him a few times. On each occasion, he is quite happy to go in to other peoples homes but only if I go with him. And when I leave he kicks up such a fuss that he's let out again.

Other people cannot pick him up but when I do, he pushes his head tight into my chest and closes his eyes, looking so content. He breaks my heart but I cannot keep him because my two feel threatened by him. I have really tried.

Several weeks ago I had to resort to giving him a very slight tap on the bum to discourage him from following me home, and he gave me such a pained look. I wouldn't hurt an animal at all, and there is no way he could have felt pain from such a slight tap, but I noticed since then that I need to be careful about hand movements as he tends to cower a little.

So I stopped that way of deterring him, and now again I have him sitting in my front garden, just waiting for me. He didn't even want to eat tonight, he just wanted me!

Most of the time when I feed him, he starts eating as if he's not eaten in a month, but the moment I walk away he stops and comes running after me, I have to stand next to him to ensure he eats.

I know from my experience with cats that when they behave so insistently in a common manner, they are trying to tell you something, I once had a feral mother staring at me all night while I sat on the PC, and when I went out to her, she had a dying kitten on the patio.

But what could this cat be telling me? I really am at a loss as to what to do with him, I cannot get him into a cat basket to check if he is chipped.

At one point I walked him up and down all the streets in my area to see if he recognised where he might live...but nothing.

My own cats know exactly what I mean with hand gestures or words, but this cat is even more understanding. He will do exactly as I say, he will follow me anywhere, the only thing he won't do is stop following me home.

Sorry for such a long post but this cat is tugging at my heartstrings...there's something he wants but I don't know what.

Can anyone please give me some suggestions?

Thanks.

 

[KarenKat]

I think he’s telling you he wants to be with you. What an affectionate little guy! Our neighbor had two outdoor cats, and about a year ago she moved away and only took one. This left Olive alone and we started feeding her. She acted just like this, she wanted attention and pets so badly she would insist we follow her to her food bowl and pet her while she ate, and follow her back to her little cat house we bought. She was more love starved than food starved.

I don’t have any good advice, but it sounds like this kitty decided she’s your family.

 

[Q2U]

 

[jen]

I think that he is disturbing to your resident cats because they only encounter each other outside and there are so many threats out there. Everyone is on the defense. Many times even bonded cats who spend some time apart will be on the defense and hiss and growl when they meet again.

But if you brought him into your home, had him properly vetted, and slowly introduced him the right way this will be a whole different story. I would not let your two siblings stop you from taking in this cat who clearly wants to be with you. Please don't judge how your cats react to him outside the home without introductions.

 

[Furensics]

Thanks everyone for your replies.
KarenKat, that's the way I see it to, I did post on another forum saying "Looking for love" with a pic of him!

Jen, thanks as well but the problem with my cats is at their territory. They are fine with him in the street, they even greet him, rubbing noses.
Biscuit even encourages him to follow us home at nights, she waits for him, looks around when she can't see him, allows him to get ahead of her.

Baby always greets him well in the street, but the moment the cat comes near me, he hisses.

Mine consider both my old address and new address their home, but Baby won't go into the old address anymore as 'Bungle' (as I call him) sits there waiting.

Also, I currently live in a converted garage..a fully detached type bungalow, with lockable front gate. It's nice but it's small, small even for two cats, let alone three...and a massive one as well!

I'm worried about winter....but I think I'm stuck with him.
I do care about him, but my two have grown up with me, and we know how each other think and feel...I'm too sensitive to their feelings!

I actually had a dream about him last night...I agreed to let him stay and he jumpred on my lap, stood up and put both paws around my neck and squeezed..I must be going mad!

I guess I need to know how to make this cat stop wanting me??

 

[FeebysOwner]

Do you have any friends or family that would be interested in adopting this cat? If so, they could start to walk with you in the neighborhood and begin to interact with the cat for a while. The friend/family could provide treats and start to 'take over' your role, as time passes. It is possible if the cat thinks someone else is interested in him, he might warm up to them and accept them as his new owner.

He clearly wants to be with someone and doesn't want to be on his own anymore. I hope you can find someone who would like to become his friend and eventually adopt him.

If the above isn't possible, and you don't change your mind about taking him in - do you have a no kill shelter that you could take him to?

 

[ArchyCat]

Adopt the cat. He seems to have already adopted you.

There are many articles about how to introduce a new cat to your resident cats. And there are many members who have been there, done that, and was awarded a t-shirt for doing its. There is lots of help available at TVCS. Just ask.

 

[KarenKat]

As for winter, what about a cat house for outside? Some can be heated, so at least he’s warm even if you can’t bring him in. They usually aren’t super expensive.

 

[Furensics]

Hi Freebys owner...this would be the best solution but it's hard to find someone, I really have tried, and keep trying too.
I think you're quite right about him wanting to be with someone, and I was concerned about the way he started to flinch from me after such a little tap on his bum...I feel that he may have had an abusive owner on the past.

I've noticed how cats copy each other, and he trusts me in the same way they do, it could be trust issues that make it so hard for him to stay with others, he escaped twice from homes I tried to give him.

I'm seriously thinking about a cat re-homing service, with a bit of relluctance though as I 'feel' his trust issues, and because he seems very comfortable in the area he is familiar with, but it's still an option.
Thanks.

 

[Furensics]

Archycat, thanks too for your response. I would love to take him but space and my two....I will look into your suggestion however, I would feel better keeping him myself because I would know he was gettting on alright.
I'm just having difficulty visualising this...my two are so spoiled and quite possessive!

 

[Furensics]

As for winter, what about a cat house for outside? Some can be heated, so at least he’s warm even if you can’t bring him in. They usually aren’t super expensive.

KarenKat, yes this is a good idea too. My old address has a blocked off entrance at part of the building and part of it is used as a bin area. My landlord is the same one as that address and we get on quite well, he may allow me to make a small home for him there.

I know cats aren't afraid of foxes, and Bungle isn't afraid of anything (except a tap on the bum!) but any suggestions on how to keep foxes from annoying him there? They frequesnt the bin area at nights.
I guess it's not really much of a problem is it?

 

[jen]

Jen, thanks as well but the problem with my cats is at their territory. They are fine with him in the street, they even greet him, rubbing noses.
Biscuit even encourages him to follow us home at nights, she waits for him, looks around when she can't see him, allows him to get ahead of her.

That is still not unusual though. In their own territory they should be more protective. This is why slow and proper introductions are always important when you bring a new cat home. I am sorry I don't mean to sound like I am arguing. If you just don't want another cat or to deal with slow introductions, I understand but there is almost always a way if you do it right

 

[Furensics]

Hi Jen, I would be more comfortable keeping 'Bungle' if I had a bigger home, which I might have in a few months.
I'm more worried about upsetting 'Baby' as he is a really sensitive cat and the type to cut his nose to spite his face.
As kittens, I'd kept him as mine and given his sister to my neighbour along the corridor, who passed away a few years later.
Even with his sister who he saw everyday, he didn't like her living with us.

He was the most difficult cat I have ever had and always wanted to go out, and it was only when I moved that he became a really friendly sociable cat, spending more time indoors.
Then Biscuits owner passed away and I took her...and Baby more or less moved back to my old address, knocking at my friends window when he wanted feeding!

He had to become a victim of himself before he finally accepted Biscuit and moved back home and I wouldn't like to see him go through such self inflicted suffering again.

I've had some really good suggestions here, and if worse comes to worse, I might take up the idea of building him a home for the winter, then take him when I've found a more suitable home.

In the meantime, any suggestions on how to introduce Bungle properly?
I think the biggest problem is the way he started mimicking Baby, taking his perch on my friends window sill, then in Baby's favourite spots, running when I clap my hands, following me everywhere, etc,etc, it's as if he wants to become Baby!

This is like meeting someone who could be a nice friend, only to find they have a massive crush on you and won't leave you alone!!!
Cats.....