Cat trying to get my attention?

[bayareakitties]

My 3 year old male likes to play when I get home from work, which is great.  We spend a lot of time playing with the wand, and even playing fetch.  But then if I need to stop, to just have my dinner, he goes straight to this one whicker chair and starts to claw it.  I clap to stop but he won't quit until I play again. He has NEVER shown interest in that chair before.  The only time he does this is in the evening if I try to sit down for dinner.  Is he really trying to get my attention?  Or am I projecting human qualities on him?  For now I just have to put him in the bedroom and close the door until I am done eating.  Any suggestions?  I mean I love to play with him, but I need to eat dinner!!!  

 

[tiptopper]

Yes I think he is trying to get your attention. Do you have a cat tree or scratching post for him? It may keep him off your chair. How about giving him a ball or a paper bag to keep him busy on his own?

 

[bayareakitties]

he does have a scratching post, a fairly large one that he uses here and there.  But I can't seem to redirect him to it at the times he uses something else to scratch!  I have tried to toss things to him when he starts up when I am eating but he is relentless.  I guess he just needs that attention and probably can't help himself.  Sigh.  I have to put him in the bedroom when this happens I think.  

 

[tiptopper]

They always seem to get their way! He probably sees this as a game with you.

 

[arouetta]

Eat dinner where you can see the chair in question and keep a squirt bottle by your side.  He'll learn that scratching that chair gets him wet, not attention and he will stop.

 

[bayareakitties]

Yeah I think you're right.  I think it's become a game for him. 

 

[bayareakitties]

I can't bring myself to spray bottling him, so I put him in time out in the bedroom.  But he is relentless with it.  Won't stop.  This is new too.  Never did this before for 3 years. 

 

[talkingpeanut]

I can't bring myself to spray bottling him, so I put him in time out in the bedroom.  But he is relentless with it.  Won't stop.  This is new too.  Never did this before for 3 years. 

Please don't spray him. Cats don't understand punishment and he will just know that you are hurting him.

 

[bayareakitties]

that's my sense.  I put him in the bedroom with a closed door for now just so I can eat in peace. 

 

[Primula]

Wouldn't it be simpler to remove the chair?

 

[bayareakitties]

Do you think it's the chair or his needing attention though?  I mean won't he just move to something else?

 

[Primula]

Do you think it's the chair or his needing attention though?  I mean won't he just move to something else?

You'll find out.

 

[bayareakitties]

Good point, I'll try it!

 

[Primula]

Good point, I'll try it!

I presume he's fixed?

 

[bayareakitties]

Yes

 

[arouetta]

Please don't spray him. Cats don't understand punishment and he will just know that you are hurting him.

It's not a punishment, it's an interrupt. And a squirt of water is not painful, all it does is insult their dignity.

 

[talkingpeanut]

It's not a punishment, it's an interrupt. And a squirt of water is not painful, all it does is insult their dignity.

It is a punishment. You're doing something to your cat intentionally that the cat finds unpleasant.

 

[arouetta]

It is a punishment. You're doing something to your cat intentionally that the cat finds unpleasant.

So I should do nothing as he attacks other cats or destroys property?

 

[talkingpeanut]

So I should do nothing as he attacks other cats or destroys property?

You should ignore your cat, place your cat in a different room, or distract them with play. Give treats when they are well behaved.

You spraying your cat may actually be contributing to cat on cat attacks. Redirected aggression and not feeling safe.

 

[arouetta]

You should ignore your cat, place your cat in a different room, or distract them with play. Give treats when they are well behaved.

You spraying your cat may actually be contributing to cat on cat attacks. Redirected aggression and not feeling safe.

Cats are like toddlers.  You can't reason with them.  You can only set the rules and do what it takes to enforce it.

And just like toddlers, cats aren't perfect about obeying rules.  And sometimes you have to stop things *right now*.  Sometimes it's a safety issue, sometimes it's an imminent destruction issue, but there are times that just ignoring the cat isn't going to work.

Positive reinforcement is good and is the bulk of what I do.  But when I have to step in *right now*, I'm going to do so.  And a spritz of water is a good training tool that has been recommended for decades.  It's not punishment.  Punishment is done after the damage is done as a way of deterring the rule breaking in the future.  But cats, just like toddlers, don't have the ability to connect the two.  It's an interrupt.  An interrupt is something done right at the moment to make the cat or toddler stop focusing on A and instead focus on B.

And having raised a disabled child, I had a whole host of child experts explaining how interrupts work and how to best use them.  Therefore I'm pretty familiar with the difference between punishment and interrupts and I do remember the stage where punishment wasn't useful due to the lack of cause-effect and that's when the psychologist and the psychiatrist and the developmental pediatrician and the speech therapist and the occupational therapist and even the neurologist talked about interrupts and how to best use them.  And I see nothing wrong with taking that knowledge and applying it to a cat who has the same lack of cause-effect.  It was actually a vet that recommended the spritz a couple of decades ago as an effective interrupt.

Because as much as we joke about cats being our lords and masters, the truth is they are basically furry toddlers that we've got to corral and get to live peacefully with the household rules.

And have you thought about all the things that we do to care for them that they hate even more, that actually does make them feel threatened?  Midway licks the spritz a couple of times and then calmly, tail raised in a question mark position, goes finds a food dish.  He tried to electrocute me when he got so dirty he couldn't safely bathe it out himself and I had to bathe him.  Which one do you think he hated more?  Which one probably made him feel more insecure?  Grooming Shadow has gotten me bitten.  A lot.  Trimming any of their claws, I have a limited time before I end up with nasty claw marks.  Should I stop doing all that because they clearly don't like it?  Should I blame any aggression on "Gee, guess I shouldn't have been trying to remove that mat or trying to shorten those claws."