Cat to kitten introductions not going well

[Hm93]

Hi I adopted an (uneutered make stray) 8 week old kitten just over 2 weeks ago and i have a 2-3 year old male neutered former street cat . I kept the kitten in his own room for the full 2 weeks and tried feeding them at either side of the door. My 2-3 year old resident cat refused to even walk near the door or eat even 10 feet near the door. My resident cat used to be a community cat and lived with cats before, but it seemed like he was scared as he didn't know what was lurking behind the door. I did some site and scent swapping for a few days. My resident cat was really unhappy about being in the kittens room and would just scratch at the door to get out. I got a bit impatient and decided to let them see each other through a baby gate. It went much better than I expected and my resident cat just sniffed the kitten and walked away. The kitten puffed up and acted scared but I guess this is a normal reaction. I repeated this a couple of times over about 2 days and my resident cat ate his food about 4 feet from the door with no issues with being able to see the kitten. So I decided to move the gate and allow them to physically meet. There were a few hisses from my resident cat and my kitten just puffs up every time he sees the other cat. A part from that there wasn't any aggression until yesterday. Up until yesterday my resident cat would just watch the kitten from a distance, groom himself and even sleep while the kitten was in the same room. If the kitten got too close then he would hiss. But he's recently started suddenly chasing the kitten, growling, hissing and swatting without any claws. He doesn't appear aggressive before doing this, but now the kitten has started to provoke my resident cat by walking up to him and trying to swat him on the head which results in my resident cat chasing and swatting him. I know it's my fault because I rushed the introductions. But do you experienced cat owners think I should continue and hope that in time they will get along or should I go back to the start and restart the introductions again? The whole reason I adopted the kitten was so my resident cat would have a buddy any help or advice is much appreciated

 

[Hm93]

Photos of them both below

 

[ArtNJ]

This is what I call "get away from me!" aggression, and its not so bad. One doesn't get "I'm going to kill you" aggression directed at kittens. I guess what happened here is the adult was mildly stressed when the kitten, in typical kitten fashion, decided it was no longer scared of the adult and wanted to play. That then ticked the adult into the "get away from me!" zone. Not really your fault, two weeks is generally enough with a young adult + kitten and your cat seemed to be doing pretty well.

Even now, this, as I mentioned, isn't so bad. There is a real question of whether you should just let your adult get over it on his own. After all, your kitten isn't scared, and won't be hurt. So it may *look* scary or problematic, but chances are decent that it can work itself out. Alternatively, you could back up and leave the gate up 24/7 for at least a few days, maybe a week or so.

You are probably thinking well of course I'm going to back up and do the gate. And maybe you should, but the chances are decent that when you take it down there will still be pretty much this exact level of stress for a while. Kittens that want to play, play, play are great at pushing the buttons of anxious adults. An introduction can reduce "stranger danger" but that doesn't necessarily get rid of not wanting to be jumped on. So they may still have some stuff to work through.

My guess is that whatever you do, it will be fine eventually, since the adult is so young. That said, there is definitely a possibility that they will never be actual friends. A bit unusual for a young adult to not befriend a kitten, but it definitely can happen, especially if they are a bit of an anxious cat, or not 100% confident yet because of being a former street cat.

 

[misty8723]

Is it possible they're playing?

 

[Hm93]

This is what I call "get away from me!" aggression, and its not so bad. One doesn't get "I'm going to kill you" aggression directed at kittens. I guess what happened here is the adult was mildly stressed when the kitten, in typical kitten fashion, decided it was no longer scared of the adult and wanted to play. That then ticked the adult into the "get away from me!" zone. Not really your fault, two weeks is generally enough with a young adult + kitten and your cat seemed to be doing pretty well.

Even now, this, as I mentioned, isn't so bad. There is a real question of whether you should just let your adult get over it on his own. After all, your kitten isn't scared, and won't be hurt. So it may *look* scary or problematic, but chances are decent that it can work itself out. Alternatively, you could back up and leave the gate up 24/7 for at least a few days, maybe a week or so.

You are probably thinking well of course I'm going to back up and do the gate. And maybe you should, but the chances are decent that when you take it down there will still be pretty much this exact level of stress for a while. Kittens that want to play, play, play are great at pushing the buttons of anxious adults. An introduction can reduce "stranger danger" but that doesn't necessarily get rid of not wanting to be jumped on. So they may still have some stuff to work through.

My guess is that whatever you do, it will be fine eventually, since the adult is so young. That said, there is definitely a possibility that they will never be actual friends. A bit unusual for a young adult to not befriend a kitten, but it definitely can happen, especially if they are a bit of an anxious cat, or not 100% confident yet because of being a former street cat.

Thank you so much for taking the time to write such a detailed reply, I really appreciate it. The "get away from me" definitely makes sense! The kitten is definitely very confident and quite obsessed with my resident cat. He sometimes hides for a few seconds but then comes straight back out again to try again, he's very persistent haha. In the past couple of days the hissing is definitely less and they sleep in the same room about a meter or 2 apart, but ny resident cat won't play or eat near the kitten and gets very hissy if the kitten tries to eat any treats near him, so i just feed them in separate rooms for now. They may also *possibly* have played a couple of times but again it may have just been my resident cat saying get away from me. They lightly swat each other and chase each other into a toy tunnel. No one seems scared or aggressive but my resident cat sometimes hits a bit too hard or hisses. I will see how it goes over the next few days and may take a step back if there's no improvement.
Also, my resident cat is a really confident cat but the kitten us very confident too, but hopefully they will become friend a with some patience

 

[Hm93]

Is it possible they're playing?

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I'll be honest I don't really know. I've only ever owned 1 cat so I've never actually seen 2 cats interacting before. The first couple or days my resident cat hissed all the time and swatted him really hard. The last few days the hisses are a bit less and they chase each other through a toy tunnel and lightly swat each other. My resident cat still does hiss but the kitten doesn't seem scared and keeps persistently chasing my resident cat. So I really don't know if it's play or not

 

[ArtNJ]

Well, one thing you can be sure of -- from the kitten's perspective, this is absolutely not a problem, and you can trust the kitten to make that assessment. You know this because even if the kitten retreats at times, it comes right back and is still trying to initiate play.

It sounds like the 2 year old doesn't really trust the kitten yet, even if there might be some early cautious playing.

The remedy here is time. It sounds like things are going well, and they should be given time to work through this. If there is some cautious playing, then they will likely end up friends. Even if there is no playing yet, sounds like things are improving, and that should continue.

 

[BoaztheAdventureCat]

Photos of them both below

Warning: Tomcats have been known to kill kittens. I realize your adult cat isn't a tom any more, but with him being a former street cat, this might be something to keep in mind.

Another thing to watch out for is the age of social maturity, which is between 2 & 4 years old. Since you now have 2 male cats, some competition might develop between the two of them, especially as the kitten grows up.

Also, your kitten was taken from his mom and siblings way too early, which means younger than 12 weeks of age. This makes it harder for him to know what's socially acceptable behavior around other cats and what isn't.

I could be entirely wrong, but I thought I should warn you of what I've learned just in case.

When my Dad's old cat Pretty Kitty was alive, she was a senior when I brought Boaz home as a kitten and she HATED him. She would look for opportunities to attack him and we just didn't want to risk something terrible happening since she was a former feral, so we kept her separated from him.

When my Dad and my brother brought their kittens, Posie & Asher, home 2 months later, Pretty Kitty's anamosity towards Boaz vanished. When she saw that he had other kittens to play with and that he was no longer pestering her, she could feel confident that he meant no harm and she could rest peacefully and watch from a distance the kittens play with each other.

So, perhaps you'd want to consider bringing home another kitten close to the age of your current kitten, but this time have it be a female. In my experience and research, I've found that many times the combination of 2 males and 1 female seem to be the perfect combination for a multi-cat household. The male cats have each other to wrestle and play rough with, and they have their sister, who usually assumes the role of Queen Bee, to keep them in line. Female cats don't play as rough as male cats do, so a female cat would sometimes get tired of playing with a male cat sooner than a male cat would like. Also, since there's a female cat around, the male cats have an additional cat to focus on besides each other, so they're less likely to get on each other's nerves when one wants to play and the other one is tired of playing.

I hope this helps! Best wishes to you and yours!

 

[misty8723]

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. I'll be honest I don't really know. I've only ever owned 1 cat so I've never actually seen 2 cats interacting before. The first couple or days my resident cat hissed all the time and swatted him really hard. The last few days the hisses are a bit less and they chase each other through a toy tunnel and lightly swat each other. My resident cat still does hiss but the kitten doesn't seem scared and keeps persistently chasing my resident cat. So I really don't know if it's play or not

It sounds to me like they're playing and getting to know each other. I have heard that hissing is the way mother cats tell their kittens to knock it off. Maybe it's something like that. Your resident cat just doesn't want to be bothered with kitten antics at that time.

When we first got two cats, I was clueless. When they first met Cindy (Calico) whacked Swanie (Tortie) so hard on both sides of his head, you could hear it. Cindy was older, Swanie was about 6 months maybe. Swanie went over in the corner for a minute and then came back and tried again. They wrestled a lot, I would break it up, until one day I figured maybe they're just playing, so I didn't break it up. They became absolutely the best of friends.

Now we have Cricket (tortie) and Austin (Tabby). They chase each other and wrestle. Cricket sometimes hisses and growls, but they are not fighting, so I think it's all part of the play.