Cat introduction not progressing, suggestions?

[clolobo]

Hello! I made a post on here at the beginning of the month about the introduction of my resident cat Una (female, 7 years) to my new kitten Cam (male, 3 months). We've now had Cam for a month and I don't really think there has been much progress over the past couple weeks.

Cam is no longer afraid of Una's hissing and growling and will wrap his arms around Una to try and wrestle, which she clearly does not enjoy. Obviously he's much smaller than Una so she will just push him off. Una has also begun snapping at his ears when Cam tries to play with her. There hasn't been injuries or fur flying, which is good, but I'm still concerned. Sometimes Una will tolerate his attempt to wrestle and just kind of sits there not doing anything, but most of the time she seems upset. I play with Cam whenever possible to try and spend his energy so that it doesn't end up directed at Una, but it doesn't always help.

They've done some good things recently, my mom woke up this morning to Una grooming Cam in her bed. They can also chill in the same room (within a foot of each other) as long as Cam isn't bothering her. But they have yet to really become buddies.

Another concerning thing that Una has done recently is that she has begun crying a lot more. Usually, she would only do this at night after we've all gone to bed because she wants someone to play with her. Now she's doing it during the day, but doesn't really seem interested in playing. She's also mostly stopped sleeping downstairs, but will still spend time downstairs like normal. I'm just worried (and probably overthinking) that she's really stressed

I've been considering buying a feliway diffuser to help Una be a little less on edge, would this be a good purchase? What are some other things I could try to help solidify their friendship?

 

[maggie101]

When I first read your post I thought of my old cat josie being referee over peaches and maggie. She would break up fights.maybe that's what Una's doing with Cam. Josie and Peaches became bff. Where does Cam sleep? Do you lock them out of your bedroom at night?

 

[ArtNJ]

It sounds to me like the worst is over, and at this point time is all thats needed. Her grooming the kitten and being within a foot of him in the rare moments when he is chill makes me think this will have a good outcome. That said, they may never get all the way to friendship, and she might well continue to hiss and try and avoid when the kitten is hyper and not taking no for an answer. Where you'll definitely see improvement over time is that there wont be stress when he isn't actively bugging her. Sometimes thats as far as they get. There is hope though, and as noted I think there are some optimistic signs, so they may well be able to do better than that! But even in the worst case, things become pretty tolerable and the older cat should be just fine despite occassionally needing to protest the little bugger's antics.

 

[Alldara]

Play chomping (what I think you're referring to as snapping at) is a normal and healthy part of cat playing. My boys all chomp at each other's ears.


How does she sound when she's crying? Can you describe it? Does it sound like a marrOOWW?

 

[di and bob]

Females are notorious for not putting up with kittens, they are the manners teachers, the limit setters, especially with boys. she enjoys doing this, so I think they will settle down into a family unit. A month is not a long time in a cat's world, they HATE change. Everything you describe is perfectly normal. The fact that your female is not hiding is great, he is just a pain to her right now, things will improve as he gets older. I think they are doing great!