Cat doesn't like new kitten

[teejay89]

My 1 year old cat Iris was slowly introduced to a new kitten Oliver. We got him because Iris has separation anxiety every time I leave the house. Over the course of a few weeks of them being around each other, I was nothing but stressed out and having really bad anxiety. Iris seemed ok as long as Oliver wasn't around her. I know that the intro phase can take a while, but it didn't really seem to get any better.

He is a very playful kitten and always tried to play with her but she would either just run away or hiss at him. Sometimes she would chase him around, but I knew it was more of a aggression play than a nice play. Oliver is more of a lovable kitten, Iris shows her love from a distance and I'm wondering if just the fact that they are such different personalities is why she couldn't get along with him. Her whole personality changed when he was given free range of the house. She was a lot more aggressive and distant towards us and it just made me have anxiety attacks because they couldn't get along.

What I did was bring Oliver to my dad's house for now, he has a boy kitten around the same age as him and within 1 hour of being together they acted like brothers! Playing and rolling around and sleeping next to each other. They had a instant bond and now I am wondering if I should break that up, and try to bring him back to try with Iris again? Or does anyone think that Iris is more of a one cat household type cat? As soon as Oliver left, Iris went right back to being herself a few days later and is a lot more calm and happy. 

Like I said before I know introductions can sometimes take a while, but I just don't want to feel like I'm forcing this relationship knowing in the end Iris might just be stressed out all the time so I'm not sure which route to take?

 

[Primula]

I don't think Iris wants another cat in the house. She seems to have made that obvious.

It would be a shame to wrench Oliver away from his little playmate. Only to bring him back to a cat who doesn't like him.

If you absolutely wanted to keep Oliver, I would suggest bringing the other kitten along too. They would entertain each other & probably leave Iris alone.

 

[teejay89]

I don't think Iris wants another cat in the house. She seems to have made that obvious.

It would be a shame to wrench Oliver away from his little playmate. Only to bring him back to a cat who doesn't like him.

If you absolutely wanted to keep Oliver, I would suggest bringing the other kitten along too. They would entertain each other & probably leave Iris alone.

Thank you, I feel like that's what I should do too. When I see him at my dad's house he is such a happy little kitty playing with the other one. I really wanted it to work with Iris because she hates when I leave the house, even with my boyfriend in the house she still just stays under the bed and hardly comes out unless it's for food. Now that I'm working 12 hour shifts it's gotten worse but I come home on my lunch to be around her. 

 

[Primula]

Thank you, I feel like that's what I should do too. When I see him at my dad's house he is such a happy little kitty playing with the other one. I really wanted it to work with Iris because she hates when I leave the house, even with my boyfriend in the house she still just stays under the bed and hardly comes out unless it's for food. Now that I'm working 12 hour shifts it's gotten worse but I come home on my lunch to be around her. 

Sometimes with a "difficult" cat you just have to let them be. It's not your fault Iris is the way she is. My Looby Loo is highly strung, to put it mildly, & she is never going to change so I let her just be.

 

[3catlady]

I had a female cat who was this way as well. We later added a male kitten to our home, and she really wanted nothing to do with him. He'd try to play, but she would mostly hiss & swat at him. Eventually, we added a 2nd male kitten. The 2 males became friends & played together, keeping each other busy, while leaving her alone. She was happier that way and my first male kitten was happy having a playmate. So based on my experience, I second adding the other kitten playmate to your home if that's a possibility for you.

 

[teejay89]

Thanks! I wish I could take both home with me, but I'm not sure our landlord would allow 3 cats in our tiny apartment. Hopefully this year we will be moving into a bigger place, maybe even buying our first home then that would make things a lot easier. I'm glad I'm not the only one going through this, I hate leaving her alone all day!