Cat Bullies Other, One Relegated To Kitchen

[trizzo0309]

Here's the TLDR of the whole situation: Had three cats in apartment, got a new one. New one was stuck in the bedroom for six months and was so scared to come out because one cat would bully/attack him.

Two of the four cats left so now it is the bullied cat/one with low self confidence and my original cat who is shy and a good cat overall.

Before the two other cats left we would lock them up at night and let the two now existing cats roam around and hang out. We noticed that the newer bully cat would chase my original cat around and the original cat would hide in the kitchen/stay elevated to not get chased.

Now both cats are around each other during the day but it's a similar story. Original cat sticks to the kitchen while the bully cat hangs nearby watching him and when the original cat does try wandering somewhere the bully cat chases him. Note: he does not attack him, just chases him into another room or around and there is hissing but no physical violence.

Does anyone have some tips? I don't want to re-home any of these two guys as I love them to death. Please help!

 

[susanm9006]

You might want to consider buying a two story cat crate that has plenty of room for a litterbox and places to sleep. You can alternate cats in it so each has free time and crate time and perhaps if the timid cat can see the bully cat but doesn’t get chased she may get less fearful of him.

 

[margd]

I am a little confused about which cat is which. Did you keep the cat who lived in your bedroom for six months and has he started bullying your original cat? Would you mind if I asked you to name all 4 cats and tell me which two you still have? I think that would help me better understand your situation.

There is one thing I can suggest right off the bat, though. Your cat who is being chased needs a way to get away from the cat who is chasing him. Try to look at your living space from the perspective of the cat being chased. Are there places he can go where the cat chasing him can't follow? Look especially at your vertical space. Cat trees and/or wall shelves are especially useful, even essential in a situation like yours. This article provides more information: How To Make Your Home Bigger (at Least For Your Cats)

The departure of the other two cats in the household has probably changed the dynamic between the two remaining cats. It will take some time for them to work out a new balance in their relationship and in their territorial claims. Try to be patient. You may find that the one cat's aggression towards the other begins to dissipate as the new balance is achieved.

Good luck! I hope they come to terms with each other soon. Re-homing either one should be the absolute last thing to consider - I think you still have other options at this point.

 

[trizzo0309]

You might want to consider buying a two story cat crate that has plenty of room for a litterbox and places to sleep. You can alternate cats in it so each has free time and crate time and perhaps if the timid cat can see the bully cat but doesn’t get chased she may get less fearful of him.

Thanks for the tip! My one problem is that one cat is generally going to be locked up then. Isn't that kind of sad? I would prefer to have them be cool with one another instead of having to lock one up.

 

[trizzo0309]

I am a little confused about which cat is which. Did you keep the cat who lived in your bedroom for six months and has he started bullying your original cat? Would you mind if I asked you to name all 4 cats and tell me which two you still have? I think that would help me better understand your situation. View attachment 199525

There is one thing I can suggest right off the bat, though. Your cat who is being chased needs a way to get away from the cat who is chasing him. Try to look at your living space from the perspective of the cat being chased. Are there places he can go where the cat chasing him can't follow? Look especially at your vertical space. Cat trees and/or wall shelves are especially useful, even essential in a situation like yours. This article provides more information: How To Make Your Home Bigger (at Least For Your Cats)

The departure of the other two cats in the household has probably changed the dynamic between the two remaining cats. It will take some time for them to work out a new balance in their relationship and in their territorial claims. Try to be patient. You may find that the one cat's aggression towards the other begins to dissipate as the new balance is achieved.

Good luck! I hope they come to terms with each other soon. Re-homing either one should be the absolute last thing to consider - I think you still have other options at this point.

View attachment 199528

Thank you for your reply. Cat A was my original cat who lived with B and C. We got Cat D and B would bully D so we had D live in the bedroom for six months to get used to the house and feel comfy. Cats B and C left so now it is A and D.

D is the newest cat who was bullied and A is a shy cat who loved getting along with B and C but is now being chased around and hissing whenever D is near. D sort of follows A around and keeps an eye on him. More or less stalking him. A then runs into the kitchen and is safe on the window sill there and on the kitchen counters.

That's been there relationship for a week or two now and I want them to not necessarily like eachother but at least not have such tension you know? Have any good tips for that?

 

[arouetta]

I haven't solved my own bullying issue, but I did manage to ease tensions by territory swapping. Maybe get a barrier and keep D in the kitchen and give A run of the house at times? That way there's a better scent mixture.

 

[susanm9006]

Hopefully if they can be in close proximity to one another they will both calm down and the crate would no longer be necessary or at least wouldn’t need to be closed.

 

[trizzo0309]

Hopefully if they can be in close proximity to one another they will both calm down and the crate would no longer be necessary or at least wouldn’t need to be closed.

Well, I won't be using a crate since that is just unnecessary I think. Have any other tips to help them get along?

 

[margd]

Thank you for your reply. Cat A was my original cat who lived with B and C. We got Cat D and B would bully D so we had D live in the bedroom for six months to get used to the house and feel comfy. Cats B and C left so now it is A and D.

D is the newest cat who was bullied and A is a shy cat who loved getting along with B and C but is now being chased around and hissing whenever D is near. D sort of follows A around and keeps an eye on him. More or less stalking him. A then runs into the kitchen and is safe on the window sill there and on the kitchen counters.

That's been there relationship for a week or two now and I want them to not necessarily like eachother but at least not have such tension you know? Have any good tips for that?

It seems that D has gone from being the bullied to the bully and your poor cat A is suffering for it. It's really hard to know what is going through D's head but I wonder if he's throwing his weight around as a reaction to finally gaining more territory and confidence after his time in the bedroom with a bully cat in the house.

One thing you might try is to reintroduce them. It's true they've lived together for a long time but their dynamic has changed considerably very recently. If you go this route, you would basically separate them and then gradually let them have more contact with each other. As arouetta has mentioned, territory swapping can be very helpful, as well. Here is an article on introducing cats that should help: How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide It's written as though you're bringing home a new cat, but the process can still be very useful to help cats get along who are not meeting for the first time.

Another option: You might also try putting cat D on "time out." This involves saying NO in a loud firm voice (avoid sounding angry), picking up Cat D and putting him in the bathroom or some other closed room. Time out for cats shouldn't be much more than a minute or two - longer banishment doesn't do any good as they don't understand what's happening. The main thing is that you want Cat D to associate your "NO" with being removed from the "fun" without being able to return. It's the separation that counts, not how much time he spends behind closed doors. This doesn't work with all cats, but it's worth trying. Be sure to give him a treat whenever he listens to you. Here's another article to add to your pile of reading. The Dos And Don'ts Of Cat Behavior Modification

There is a product called Feliway that is based on pheromones that cats emit when they are happy and content. The theory is that cats in the vicinity of aerosol will relax and become less stressed. It's available as a plug in diffuser and as a spray. You might consider purchasing one or both of these formulations, spraying for quick results and using a diffuser for a more constant level in the air. Unfortunately, Feliway (or Comfort Zone) is not 100% effective so there is no guarantee this would work. Still, it's worth a try - many of our members have reported terrific results with it. When you first use it, do keep a close eye on both of your cats for adverse effects. It doesn't occur that often but some cats become agitated instead of relaxed in the presence of Feliway.

Feliway is expensive, just to warn you. I've heard that the cheapest prices are on amazon but have not checked recently so can't swear to that.

I hope something helps. Remember that it's only been a bit over a week since this new dynamic occurred and it will take time to achieve a balance. Patience is really key here.

Good luck!

 

[trizzo0309]

It seems that D has gone from being the bullied to the bully and your poor cat A is suffering for it. It's really hard to know what is going through D's head but I wonder if he's throwing his weight around as a reaction to finally gaining more territory and confidence after his time in the bedroom with a bully cat in the house.

One thing you might try is to reintroduce them. It's true they've lived together for a long time but their dynamic has changed considerably very recently. If you go this route, you would basically separate them and then gradually let them have more contact with each other. As arouetta has mentioned, territory swapping can be very helpful, as well. Here is an article on introducing cats that should help: How To Successfully Introduce Cats: The Ultimate Guide It's written as though you're bringing home a new cat, but the process can still be very useful to help cats get along who are not meeting for the first time.

Another option: You might also try putting cat D on "time out." This involves saying NO in a loud firm voice (avoid sounding angry), picking up Cat D and putting him in the bathroom or some other closed room. Time out for cats shouldn't be much more than a minute or two - longer banishment doesn't do any good as they don't understand what's happening. The main thing is that you want Cat D to associate your "NO" with being removed from the "fun" without being able to return. It's the separation that counts, not how much time he spends behind closed doors. This doesn't work with all cats, but it's worth trying. Be sure to give him a treat whenever he listens to you. Here's another article to add to your pile of reading. View attachment 199695 The Dos And Don'ts Of Cat Behavior Modification

There is a product called Feliway that is based on pheromones that cats emit when they are happy and content. The theory is that cats in the vicinity of aerosol will relax and become less stressed. It's available as a plug in diffuser and as a spray. You might consider purchasing one or both of these formulations, spraying for quick results and using a diffuser for a more constant level in the air. Unfortunately, Feliway (or Comfort Zone) is not 100% effective so there is no guarantee this would work. Still, it's worth a try - many of our members have reported terrific results with it. When you first use it, do keep a close eye on both of your cats for adverse effects. It doesn't occur that often but some cats become agitated instead of relaxed in the presence of Feliway.

Feliway is expensive, just to warn you. I've heard that the cheapest prices are on amazon but have not checked recently so can't swear to that.

I hope something helps. Remember that it's only been a bit over a week since this new dynamic occurred and it will take time to achieve a balance. Patience is really key here.

Good luck!

margd Thank you for your reply, it's really appreciated. I have a couple of comments I want to run by you so maybe we can come to a good idea. The reintroduction process I am familiar with but it does bring one big problem for me to light, we'd have to lock up a cat again. Our cat just spent six months locked in a bedroom getting bullied so the thought of putting him back in there for this process really bothers me now that he actually has freedom and is enjoying it.

I am familiar with Feliway and that could be a good idea!

Tonight our shy cat walked downstairs to use the bathroom twice and the newer cat chased him down there causing us to need to use a spray bottle with water to end the tension. I hear good and bad things about the squirt bottle, thoughts?

We're willing to try anything as I want the reintroduction or stowing one in a bedroom to be the last resort.

 

[margd]

I'm really sorry it has taken me so long to answer your post. I'm only now seeing it - somehow it slipped by me.

About reintroducing them: you could switch them around so that cat D wasn't the one always in the bedroom. You're right, though. Cat D will not be happy about being confined in the bedroom again. I worried about that when I made the suggestion so am not surprised that you're reluctant to go this route.

Using a spray bottle is something we actively discourage on this site because often the only thing it accomplishes is to train the cat to do the offending behavior when the human isn't around. It can also interfere with the trust between cat and human. Here is an entire article on the subject: 5 Reasons To Never Spray Water On Your Cat

You can try using sound to startle Cat D when he's chasing Cat D, thus breaking his concentration. Canned air is often recommended for this because it makes a loud whooshing sound when it emerges from the can. Try not to let your cat see you doing it, though. It's much better if the sound just seems to come from nowhere every time Cat D starts the chase.

This reminds me of something else that may help stop Cat D in mid-chase. Earlier I said something about getting a can of Feliway spray for its calming attributes. Some cats (like mine, for example) really do not like the sound of aerosols being sprayed. When I spray a room with air freshener, both cats take off at the speed of light. Of course, it might be the scent of fragrance that sends them bolting but the first time I sprayed around them, I'm pretty sure they heard the sound before they smelled the fragrance. Anyway, it's just another reason to try Feliway spray.

It's been a few days since you posted. Has Cat D calmed down any yet?

 

[trizzo0309]

I'm really sorry it has taken me so long to answer your post. I'm only now seeing it - somehow it slipped by me.

About reintroducing them: you could switch them around so that cat D wasn't the one always in the bedroom. You're right, though. Cat D will not be happy about being confined in the bedroom again. I worried about that when I made the suggestion so am not surprised that you're reluctant to go this route.

Using a spray bottle is something we actively discourage on this site because often the only thing it accomplishes is to train the cat to do the offending behavior when the human isn't around. It can also interfere with the trust between cat and human. Here is an entire article on the subject: 5 Reasons To Never Spray Water On Your Cat

You can try using sound to startle Cat D when he's chasing Cat D, thus breaking his concentration. Canned air is often recommended for this because it makes a loud whooshing sound when it emerges from the can. Try not to let your cat see you doing it, though. It's much better if the sound just seems to come from nowhere every time Cat D starts the chase.

This reminds me of something else that may help stop Cat D in mid-chase. Earlier I said something about getting a can of Feliway spray for its calming attributes. Some cats (like mine, for example) really do not like the sound of aerosols being sprayed. When I spray a room with air freshener, both cats take off at the speed of light. Of course, it might be the scent of fragrance that sends them bolting but the first time I sprayed around them, I'm pretty sure they heard the sound before they smelled the fragrance. Anyway, it's just another reason to try Feliway spray.

It's been a few days since you posted. Has Cat D calmed down any yet?

margd I will go ahead and take your advice on not using the squirt bottle going forward, I have heard contradicting things about that in my life.

What I have been doing when he stalks the other cat is clap my hands or just say "hey" in a stern but not yelling voice and that takes his attention away from the other cat for a second or two then he's back looking/staring/following the other one.

The feliway does seem like a smart route to try even if it may be expensive and run the risk of not working.

It's been pretty much the same. The shy cat stays in the kitchen mostly on the counters/floor/windows and the ex-bullied cat will always be around keeping an eye on him. When aggressor cat goes to sleep upstairs or explore in the basement the shy one will walk into the living room/basement without a problem and enjoy his life.

When aggressor sees the shy cat in his territory (not in kitchen) he more or less follows him, gets real close and does cat-talk to him (you know the small chirps?) then shy cat will hiss if aggressor overstays his welcome and he retreats into the kitchen.

If the shy cat is out and about walking on the furniture the aggressor will climb on it too and just follow him. He won't scratch, hiss, bite or do anything other than follow/chase and maybe paw him in a non-threatening way.

It's pretty straightforward as to what is causing all this and why they are doing it but I just would like it to stop so shy cat doesn't feel threatened by leaving the kitchen.

 

[trizzo0309]

margd Okay, we hit a major setback last night. We woke up this morning to see the shy cat did #2 in our sink last night while we were sleeping. He was clearly pinned into not be able to leave the kitchen last night and had no other choice but to go. Have ideas? We don't want to re-home one

 

[margd]

Poor Shy Cat. He really is having a tough time of it.

And it seems that Cat D is becoming more aggressive instead of less, making hopes that he would settle down seem a bit less realistic.

I think it is time to try re-introduction, even though it means time behind closed doors again for Cat D. Cat A was there first and has never caused any problems so when both sets of needs can't be met simultaneously, I'd give a little extra weight to those of Cat A.

You said that you didn't want to re-home one of them, but if it does get to that point, I hope you keep Cat A. Cat D may be one of those cats who simply won't share the territory with another cat. You aren't at the point of re-homing yet, though. You can still try reintroduction and Feliway but you should also take Cat D to his vet. There are two reasons to do so and in retrospect, I should have recommended this right off the bat.

First: Cat D's behavior changed suddenly and, while it is probably due to recent changes in the household, sudden behavior changes are always worth a check-up with the vet. They can signify an underlying medical issue which is best caught earlier than later.

Second: While there, ask the vet about medication. This is usually the last thing we recommend but it's certainly worth getting input from a vet on this issue. Medications, such as Prozac, can reduce aggression and anxiety in cats. Perhaps a short term course of treatment would be helpful in Cat D's case.

I really hope things work out. Cat A and Cat D may never be good friends, but hopefully they can learn to tolerate each other.

 

[Lalka]

How big is your apartment?

 

[trizzo0309]

How big is your apartment?

Lalka Three stories, so plenty of room all-around.

 

[Lalka]

Second: While there, ask the vet about medication. This is usually the last thing we recommend but it's certainly worth getting input from a vet on this issue. Medications, such as Prozac, can reduce aggression and anxiety in cats. Perhaps a short term course of treatment would be helpful in Cat D's case.

Before doing that ...maybe a feliway collar?

 

[trizzo0309]

Poor Shy Cat. He really is having a tough time of it. View attachment 200333 And it seems that Cat D is becoming more aggressive instead of less, making hopes that he would settle down seem a bit less realistic.

I think it is time to try re-introduction, even though it means time behind closed doors again for Cat D. Cat A was there first and has never caused any problems so when both sets of needs can't be met simultaneously, I'd give a little extra weight to those of Cat A.

You said that you didn't want to re-home one of them, but if it does get to that point, I hope you keep Cat A. Cat D may be one of those cats who simply won't share the territory with another cat. You aren't at the point of re-homing yet, though. You can still try reintroduction and Feliway but you should also take Cat D to his vet. There are two reasons to do so and in retrospect, I should have recommended this right off the bat.

First: Cat D's behavior changed suddenly and, while it is probably due to recent changes in the household, sudden behavior changes are always worth a check-up with the vet. They can signify an underlying medical issue which is best caught earlier than later.

Second: While there, ask the vet about medication. This is usually the last thing we recommend but it's certainly worth getting input from a vet on this issue. Medications, such as Prozac, can reduce aggression and anxiety in cats. Perhaps a short term course of treatment would be helpful in Cat D's case.

I really hope things work out. Cat A and Cat D may never be good friends, but hopefully they can learn to tolerate each other.

margd We went out and purchased a Feliway diffuser today that plugs into the wall so hopefully that works. We noticed some aggression earlier in the day after plugging it in and I know this takes time but we don't have too much time.

We brought cat D maybe a month or two ago when he had an ear infection but we can, in theory, go for another check up. How would you go about a re-introduction process? Keep one in the bedroom all day and have them meet visually for feeding time each? I cannot physically wrap my head around locking this cat back up after all he went through and putting him through this again.

I don't care if they are best friends, I just want Cat A to be able to walk around the apartment without being worried about being chased and stalked. Go figure we are leaving for vacation in a couple days too.

 

[trizzo0309]

Before doing that ...maybe a feliway collar?

Lalka We purchased a feliway plugin diffuser today and am going to try that. We previously had a collar but one of the cats kept choking himself on it so we removed it.

 

[trizzo0309]

margd Shy cat has used the bathroom twice on the counter and sink, we are thinking we need a cat therapist as this situation is now extremely dire.