Cat Anxiety & Moving across states

[catloveroc]

Hi everyone, I am writing in the hopes to gather some advice and support. I have a cat - 2.5 yrs old, adopted as a kitten from a rescued stray mom- who has severe anxiety when leaving the house. Going to the vet is an absolute nightmare. Last time we went for a minor eye issue (the usual cat eye virus problem, she had it since i adopted her), she panicked so much she refused to eat for several days after and I had to force feed her. I live in an apartment and i try to get her used to getting out by taking her in a stroller to the community room in my building at night when no one is there. I also bring her brother cat with us, who is her emotional support. However every time as soon as we get back in the apartment, she jumps out of the stroller and vomits and breaths like she is in panic. I only try to do this because I am moving to Virginia from upstate NY during the summer and it's an 8 hour long drive, I most likely will have to do alone with the cats. I thought i would try and get her used little by little to car drives and leaving the house. SO I started with the community room of the building. But her reaction is so strong, and honestly i dont know what to do now. Shall i keep and try to get her used little by little? Or shall i not stress her repeatedly til the move to VA, and just deal with the 8h car drive differently? I really need some advice, i dont want her to panic to the point of vomiting but i dont know how to tell her that she's safe. Thank you for the help

 

[Kris107]

Perhaps the stroller rides aren't for her. I vote for letting her be if she seems terrified. Some cats are adventure cats and others are strictly homebodies. For the trip, talk to your vet and see if you can get her meds. When you get to your new place, definitely get a small room ready with lots of things that smell like "old" home. I had a cat who was anxious until the day she died. Then there are cats on all parts of the spectrum to brave and confident.

 

[Alldara]

Don't stress her repeatedly.
Get her used to whatever stroller/pen that will be her safe place in the car. Make it safe, and cozy. Invite her to have treats in it and play around it and eat in there. Put her favorite toys and some catnip near it and just generally get her used to it.

Ask your vet for some anxiety medication before the move and perhaps an appetite stimulant for afterwards. You can likely do a phone appointment for this with some vets. (Don't forget to scope out vets in your new area before moving! Maybe even call ahead and let them know you're moving with a nervous cat and might need their services. You can pre sign up to be a patient! Then you're not looking for who is taking new patients during an emergency should one arise due to stress or you need a refill on appetite stimulants.)

Talk to her about what will happen. When you will move, how she will go in her safe pen and have a nap and then you'll be in new home together as family.


New home
In your new place prepare to keep her in a safe room for a few days. Cat proof this room before releasing your cats inside it. Perhaps this room is your bedroom. You'll spend time in it relaxing too so she knows it's safe and a family space. Ensure she can meet all her needs in this room (litter, food, water, the same comfort crate, some familiar beds and blankets and scratching posts).

Play some cat calming music (any streaming platform) or cat purring on loop. This is to keep her from being stressed by new sounds jarring her so much (if there's a constant sound, new sounds are less scary). Also play this music frequently before you leave during calm peaceful times.

Ensure you have some high reward treats or food that she goes nuts for like Churu or something. She might live off treats a couple days. Be prepared too for hand feeding her.

Keep talking to her in a calm, positive voice. After a few days open more space up to her and encourage exploring but don't push it. Ideally you say have two scratching posts now and one would be already in the room with her and the other would be where you'll want it permanently. So she will find her own scent markers like this as she explores. You can use spare cat blankets as scent markers too. You can also take a used shirt of yours, pet each cat with it and rub it along the walls at cat height to already build that family scent in your new space.

So you'll be using that comfort idea of just pushing the threshold of safety. A treat just outside the safe room door that she could use a paw to pull in for example or playing with her in the doorway.


Right now with the stroller you aren't slowly building that confidence or slowly pushing that safe boundary. You're doing the equivalent of throwing a child in deep water to teach swimming. You were trying to do the first and have very good intentions. But the reality is she doesn't need to be used to those spaces you're taking her to now and she's not a cat who enjoys exploring; she's not confident with it. So focus on building your bond and trust with her over this time.

 

[cejhome]

Gabapentin, is great for this, as long as there aren't any health issues or other medicines that would make Gabapentin not possible. We had a cat (Nilla) who stressed at car rides, leaving the house, fireworks, thunderstorms. Car rides and vet visits was the worse. I guess because she couldn't go and hide. She couldn't be examined at the vet without sedation. She wouldn't attack, just would try to get away from them. Our vet was at the time was a very experienced cat vet. She prescribed Gabapentin and it worked great. For vet visits we would give it to her pill capsule wrapped in a thin layer of pill pocket - about a 1/3 of a pill pocket) the night before and the morning of her vet visit (2 hours before her vet visit), it was the only way she could get an exam.

We moved about a 5.5 hour drive distance at the end of December 2021. I followed the same with dosing with Nilla for that car ride. She fell asleep about 20 minutes into the car ride (when I hit the highway) and slept the whole way. When I got her crate into the new house (we had the master bedroom and bath already set up for her), she was ready to look around in about 10 minutes - still a bit sleepy, but not stumbling.

I had a large (not the extra large) metal crate in the back of my small SUV for her - I had a small disposable litter box and a bed it in. There was enough room for her to stand up and move a little bit. I covered it with a blanket, and left a tiny corner open so I could look back and see her. I stopped a couple times during the drive to check on her. She didn't even wake up. I think I got to the new house around 12:30 pm. A couple hours later, she was ready to look around the new house and even went out on the screened in porch with me to lay in the sun.

If you can, try and play mellow music in the car as a moderate/soft level while you drive and try to stay calm yourself. I have absolutely no sense of direction (more of an anti-sense) and this was the 2nd time I had driven to the new house, and the 2nd time I had to drive so far. I was nervous and had to have the "Google Lady" - Google maps guiding my way. My husband had a flat tire in his car (we were driving both cars down to the new house). So was very stressful for me! I am so glad Nilla didn't have a problem with the trip at all (or settling into the new house).

I always had a small supply of Gabapentin capsules for just-in-case unscheduled vet visits, etc. It must be prescribed by your vet - the dosage is based on your cat's weight.

Nilla was about 13 when we moved. She is gone now, she had heath issues as she aged and we finally had to have her put sleep due to cancer.

 

[catloveroc]

Thank you all so much. This is super helpful and makes me feel less in panic about the move myself.

I will implement everything you folks suggested, recapping for my own mental organization:

- get her used to the crate, create a safe space for her there
- establish patient status with a vet in new town beforehand
- ask vet for anxiety med & appetite stimulant for afterwards
- in new house start with safe room and slowly expand, use familiar scent
- play soft relaxing music
- have her favorite food/treats handy

Something else I worry about is doing the drive alone. Since it's such a long drive I might need a bathroom break. I don't know how i am going to do that however. I can't and don't want to leave the cats in the car alone and obviously can't bring them with me to the restroom. I will keep looking to see if anyone would be available to do the drive with me, but I do not have family and I don't know many people here. I have been looking into these devices that allow you to void in the car (i know, not the most refined topic of conversation), but i dont know what else i could do.

Thanks again for the help, you guys are truly fantastic.

 

[Alldara]

Were looking forward to hearing how it goes for you and if you need any more help brainstorming after getting to where you need to be!

As for the cat ride, you find a solution you are comfortable with!

 

[Margot Lane]

Obviously since it’s a summer drive, try to find cool & shady places to park if you do have to leap out to commune with nature. Hope your car has good air conditioning. Are you doing it one straight shot or breaking it up w/ a motel? Feel free to contact us if you can during the journey! Please let us know when you arrive!

 

[catloveroc]

Thank you all you make me feel supported and it's helping a lot. I am on the fence as to breaking the trip or not. I wonder what would stress the cats less. I have been leaning towards doing one long stretch, given how my cats reacts to the community room, so it's one and done, and she's not traumatized for two days. I am now thinking I should still have a plan B in mind and maybe map some hotels that would accept cats, just in case it seems it may help to stop somewhere.
I am going to get my car thoroughly checked before the trip, we do indeed need good AC for the trip.
I will make a note to reach out and update you all once we're in VA! Thank you!!

 

[Alldara]

Thank you all you make me feel supported and it's helping a lot. I am on the fence as to breaking the trip or not. I wonder what would stress the cats less. I have been leaning towards doing one long stretch, given how my cats reacts to the community room, so it's one and done, and she's not traumatized for two days. I am now thinking I should still have a plan B in mind and maybe map some hotels that would accept cats, just in case it seems it may help to stop somewhere.
I am going to get my car thoroughly checked before the trip, we do indeed need good AC for the trip.
I will make a note to reach out and update you all once we're in VA! Thank you!!

Wonderful plan!

 

[cejhome]

If you can use Gabapentin, you will need to test it out well beforehand, to make sure the dosage prescribed will work for your kitty. Try and get or borrow one of those metal crates, not a cat carrier. One that is big enough for a small bed and litter box. Make sure that the crate will not move around in the back of your SUV - I had a couple rolled up carpets next to it, and I think a small box behind it (between the crate and the rear door. I also used old towels and a moving blanket to cushion it so it wouldn't rattle around. I covered the crate with a light weight blanket. If it will be warm out when you move, maybe a sheet will do.

I made stops - one bathroom stop and one just to stand up and stretch my legs a bit. Both stops were not at rest stops. One was at a Cracker Barrel - fast in and out, and one was as a Stuckey's Pecans place - same thing - very fast in and out. The parking lots are plenty busy, so I felt comfortable leaving Nilla in the car. Those sorts of places cater to families, older people, etc., so I didn't worry about anyone messing with my car and people weren't rushing in and out (except for me!!!), so I felt that if more comfortable that the folks going in and out of those places would notice if something wasn't right around my car.

I didn't need to stop for gas, but if you do, hopefully you can pay with a credit card at the pump so you don't have to go in. At both stops, I peaked in at Nilla to see how she was doing - she was sleeping.

It was Christmas week when we moved, so it was cool (not cold). I you aren't going to be gone longer than just a quick restroom break your kitty will be fine, even if its hot outside, as long as your A/C is working well.

If you have a smart phone, even if you don't have a car that has the fancy bluetooth stuff, you can use Google Maps or the Apple equivalent. The Google Map lady was a life saver for me. Make sure you test it out well before hand to make sure you have it set up so you can hear the directions. My old smartphone didn't work with the bluetooth unless I played around with the settings in Google Maps. I can't remember the solution, but I am so glad I didn't wait until it was day of the trip to make sure I had it working! I also printed out the directions from Google Maps, just in case something happened.

Make sure you have water and a snack if you will be needing it. That way you don't have to do anything when you make a stop but run in, use the restroom and run back out. Try and time your stops to not be at the busiest times, if possible.

On finding a vet before you move - do try to have a few lined up that get good review and are convenient to your new home (if possible). If you really like one ahead of your move, see if they will let you go ahead and have your current vet send over your kitty's records. I did that. However, turned out the vet I chose wasn't "the one". I went end up trying out 2 more vets, with the 3rd one being the one I stayed with. They aren't the closest, but I love the vets and staff,and the practice has several vets, so they can get you in fast when you need it. Very efficient and competent folks. It's not a corporate vet, either. The most important thing to corporate owned practices is PROFIT, not quality care. The vets aren't owners, they are just employees of the corporation.

Do not be afraid to switch vets if you don't feel good about your initial choice. The 1st vet I chose had great reviews, he was nice and seemed very competent, however I did get the feeling he was stretching himself too thin - he needed another vet there (he only had a part time vet to help him). He ended up messing up a prescription for Nilla - prescribed way to much of her blood pressure med. Our pharmacist caught it, even though the prescription was for a cat! 2nd vet was close and had multiple vets, but I just felt like they were more comfortable with dogs, and didn't really know cats. I could tell by the way the two vets we saw there handled Nilla, that they weren't really familiar with cats. 3rd vet is about 15 miles from us (about 20 minute drive), but well worth it. They are great with Buddy and for the short time they saw Nilla before we had to put her to sleep, they were wonderful.

When I got to the new house, I was way ahead of my husband. He was going to try and get there a little bit before me. He had flat tire in his car - he made it off the highway to a tire place, but had to wait until they opened. He didn't want me to wait with him. I ended up getting there a couple hours ahead of him. I got out of the car, unlocked the house, and ran back out and removed the stuff from the back enough so that I could get the crate out and carried it in. Brought it into the master bedroom, set up a water and food dish - I had already set up a litter box and brought down a supply of food, toys, etc., when we both came down with a u-haul truck a few weeks earlier.

At this point she was awake, but still sleepy. She was scared, but not too stressed. She settled down quickly.

I sat in the bedroom with Nilla (I shut the door) for a little bit, then went to work bringing the stuff in from my car.

Within a couple hours, she was wanting to be out and about in the house and even wanted to sit on the porch with me (screened in porch) in a sun spot. It may have been winter, but it was a very nice day!

It was turned out to be not too bad at all!

Here is the type of crate I used - "Folding Metal Dog Crate". Its great because it folds up (you have to remove the plastic tray), it doesn't take up much storage room. I used duct tape to tape the little litterbox to the tray so it couldn't slide around. I actually used a small plastic storage bin for the litter box.

 

[cmshap]

Don't forget to scope out vets in your new area before moving! Maybe even call ahead and let them know you're moving with a nervous cat and might need their services. You can pre sign up to be a patient!

I just wanted to comment on this being one of those mind-blowing, "why did I never think of that before?" ideas. Thanks.

I am not moving soon, but probably will eventually in the coming years, and this is a great idea.